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New Message

@newmessage.bsky.social
340 followers 320 following 1.2K posts

The truth is, I'm here to entertain ME, not you. If you feel anything is 'too sacred to ridicule' you are an extremist. youtube.com/@NewMessage

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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 3h
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 3h
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Brett Shaw @brettshaw.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
OMG you sound like my Mom.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Kash Patel is so hard right now...
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
They were bound to stumble onto a successful business strategy eventually, I guess.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Hawt.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
He's certainly mutilizating the English language.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Those pervert glasses from Meta come in tinted, right? So we're fine.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
"Is it time for Morbing? You bet!"
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Oh no.. they not only fly planes, but they drive cars now too?
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
"Who am I? Well I'm not Bruce Wayne, that's for sure."
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Alberta Community Bat Program/Western Bat Program 🦇 @albertabats.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
October belongs to the bats. 🦇🍂 They migrate, hibernate, navigate with sound and live surprisingly long lives. And there's still so much we don't know about them. It's Bat Month! All October we'll be sharing the science, stories and mysteries of bats. Come hang out with us. 🦇
A Little Brown Myotis rests on grey tree bark with a dark background. Text reads October is Bat Month! Come Hang With Us! Logos of both WCS Western Bat Program and the Alberta Community Bat Program. PHoto by Jason Headley.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Share a TV show that raised you
Best kid's show EVER.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
So you're arming the oysters? Crazy.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Kash Patel is rock hard right now...
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Really, we should call them 'Ca-cas'.
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Alfred E. Neuman ( MAD Magazine ) @alfreds-mad-world.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
#madmagazine
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
But last time I did that, my team won, so....
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
*whispers* Nobody tell him about the Dodos....
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
* shakes the offering plate *
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
*Sits quietly for a long, long moment... then gently drops the Bible into the fire*
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
And none of that 'double space' shit, either.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
🤞
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Teasing his Reichstag moment?
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George Wallace @mrgeorgewallace.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Private companies are hiding the Musk doc, while public funds are makin' Trump ads. If you are cool with it you can kiss my entire black ass and whatnot.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Cap'n Crunch must stand trial for the crimes he committed against the proud people of the Crucnchberry Islands!
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ouinne @ouinne.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
ANNUAL HALLOWEEN REMINDER THAT ANYTHING WITH ACTIVATED CHARCOAL *WILL* FUCK WITH YOUR MEDICATIONS
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The prosecutor called it a 'graze', not a miss.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Look up who directed.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Methinks the calls were coming from inside the house... 🤔
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
How are the kids supposed to learn to time a mad sprint across traffic then?
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
'Thirst trap', or 'Who's on first trap'? You decide.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Show Less Like This.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
He's starting to feel it, too.. Finally, starting to feel it.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Holy shit. This guy just won us the trade war.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Not again, no.
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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M Meerkat @kackbro.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
We Feel Your Pain,Bernie.......
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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Alfred E. Neuman ( MAD Magazine ) @alfreds-mad-world.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
National Ghost Hunting Day • September 26 2026 #madmagazine
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Marie Antoinette: "Let them eat cake!" * supporters prepare to flee the imminent Revolution * Donald Trump: "Let them eat shit!" * supporters start posting tiktoks of recepie ideas *
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New Message @newmessage.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
The military is pretty hard on Privates, but... it builds better men.
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