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max

@mxwllhnryl.bsky.social
146 followers 163 following 500 posts

25 he/him 🤷🏼🍄🧙🏼🦠🎸🎷🎻🎤🎹🧗🏼🛹

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Reposted by max
-𝚖𝚘𝚡 ☃︎ ❄︎ @moxiest.art · 18/07/2026
An xkcd comic. 4 panels of people having a conversation that reads

OUR ENTERTAINMENT
DIVISION IS FAILING.
WE CAN'T COMPETE WITH FREE CONTENT.
WHERE ARE THEY GOING?
YOUTUBE?
TIKTOK?
NO.
THE GOOGLE IMAGE SEARCH RESULTS FOR WORST LADDER.
YIKES, LOOK AT THIS ONE! THE STEPLADDER IS BALANCED ON-WOW, THEY TIED A LADDER TO-
OOH, CHECK OUT THE-NO!
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
You don't think forced labor is immoral?
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Prison Journalism Project @prisonjournalism.bsky.social · 01/05/2026
"In prison, we often must adapt to abnormal conditions, including seeing distorted versions of ourselves. After I finished my morning routine, I considered whether there were any documented psychological effects of us not seeing ourselves for long periods of time."
prisonjournalismproject.org
The Magic of Having a Glass Mirror in Prison
The metal mirrors in Alabama prisons distort our faces. When a glass one suddenly appeared, I truly saw myself for the first time in 26 years.
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The Onion @theonion.com · 18/07/2026
“While I understand people’s concern, I’ve simply been on a routine visit to the next world,” said the seven-term Republican
theonion.com
Mitch McConnell Clarifies Absence Due To Brief Planned Trip To Afterlife
WASHINGTON—Explaining that the public had no reason to be alarmed over his temporary leave, Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) clarified Friday that his absence from Congress was due to a brief planned trip ...
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Emu night (1/2)
Comic page 1: a group of young emo people are hanging out in a venue with a banner that reads EMO NIGHT. Outside the venue, an emu is on the phone. He says, “yeah, could you pick me up? I think I misread the flyer.” Suddenly, behind the emu someone exclaims, “hey!”
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The Life of Sharks @thelifeofsharks.com · 14/07/2026
Happy Shark Awareness Day!
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 14/07/2026
shoutout the chucklefuck pundit who insisted once that “environmental racism” was a nonsense term
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Assigned Media @assignedmedia.org · 14/07/2026
Magdalene Visaggio was once in seminary, training to become a Catholic priest. Now she's a snarky online trans girl like the rest of us. In a challenging new essay for Assigned, she writes about the toll being hated for who she is has taken on her psyche. assignedmedia.org/breaking-new...
assignedmedia.org
I Am Not Sorry Lindsey Graham is Dead - Assigned Media
How a decade of hate made me a worse person
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The Onion @theonion.com · 14/07/2026
“Let’s see the Kennedy Curse try to take down a man with 92 billion lumens of photonic goodness surging into his taint,” the pantsless HHS secretary said as he triumphantly spread his legs from his perch on the tower’s boiler in conditions so hot a passing barn swallow was seen bursting into flames.
theonion.com
‘Time To Become Immortal,’ Announces RFK Jr., Exposing Perineum Atop Solar Tower
SAN BERNARDINO COUNTY, CA—Tugging down his blue jeans as tens of thousands of heliostat mirrors angled the noonday sun in his direction, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. was r...
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The Onion @theonion.com · 13/07/2026
Why Do We Have A Meeting With HR?
Why Do We Have A Meeting With HR?
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Good charlotte had a song that was a huge hit in the Warriors cats animated video fandom
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Butt Dust is an awesome band name
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onion person @junlper.beer · 11/07/2026
japan is making kinds of cigarettes i never imagined was possible
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
Childhood... A kid eats a bug and another boy points out "yop this kid's eating a bug! A bunch of boys gather around him and chant "GO! GO! GO! GO!" 

Adulthood... A man points to a man on a computer and says "yo, this guy's having a protracted mental breakdown online." A bunch of guys gather around him and chant "GO! GO! GO! GO!"
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
This cyclosporiasis outbreak is making me glad that most of the produce I've eaten recently has been fresh from my garden or the community farm
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
I am so in support of the expansion of professional sports to be more inclusive so lets actually be more inclusive, yeah? Trans players getting a chance to play professionally would make these leagues even more awesome.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
Love this, but I couldn't help noticing: the article claims there are at least 18 out LGBTQ+ players in the league. I don't believe that's entirely accurate because I don't think there are any out trans players in the league. Might be more accurate to say LGB, unfortunately.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Genuinely curious. I mean this would be a great time for a third party candidate to give it a shot... Just saying...
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Okay so like if everyone ignored the nazi tattoo before the primary and NOW is realizing he's a bad person, is the seat he's running for just fucked now? Is the "vote blue no matter who" camp just going to plug their ears and vote for him anyway?
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The Onion @theonion.com · 07/07/2026
“While we know fans have been collecting Twinkies for years, we believe that online-only snack cakes will help reduce physical clutter and allow for faster cream consumption without all the lengthy installations and updates,” said Hostess general manager Judd Freitag
theonion.com
Hostess Discontinues Physical Twinkies
ORRVILLE, OH—Stressing that the change in the product line was a necessary adjustment to keep apace in the digital age, snack food manufacturer Hostess announced Monday that it would discontinue physi...
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Brosephine so scary 🎃 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
Can’t sleep? Simple methods that work: • study hurricane forecast • who hates me • what did i forget • relive supreme humiliation • win 12-yr-old argument • buried alive? could happen • what i did vs should have done • dead people i miss • what if i’m bad • why do i say stuff • what’s my fuckin deal
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Heathers is pretty good
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
So?
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
Are you trying to say that justified him being institutionalized indefinitely?
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Jon Phillips @jowiph.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
I would kill or die for Larry
A small operation in Oregon that hunts truffles with a trained dog has added an unpaid trainee. A cat named Larry accompanies the handler and the truffle dog into the woods every outing, works a patch of ground a little apart from them, and digs with tremendous confidence in places where there is nothing.
The handler says Larry has never found a truffle and shows no sign of understanding the assignment. He does not use scent the way the dog does and he does not respond when the dog makes a find.
He simply digs his own holes nearby and then inspects them. "He thinks he's on the team," the handler said. "He is emphatically not on the team."
TRUFFLE DOG FINDS THE TRUFFLES -
'TRAINEE' CAT DIGS RANDOM HOLES AND FINDS DIRT
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Stephen 🔶🌹💚 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 🇬🇧 🇪🇺 🇺🇦 @thestephenralph.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
Happy #Caturday Everyone. Pru did exactly this to me only last week! 😁
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Digital Brain @yourdigitalbrain.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Peacock spiders are only 4mm long, but their courtship dance rivals any bird of paradise. Australia has over 90 species of these tiny, ultra-colorful performers.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Sluggo, dressed as Tifa Lockheart points to Fritzi dressed as Revolutionary Girl Utena and says "your Revolutionary Goil Utena costume is great, Ms. Fritzi." Fritzi turns to her niece and asks "Nancy, where's your costume for the anime convention?" Nancy turns around and points to the back of her head where she has affixed two large eyes such that she resembles a soot sprite from Spirited Away. Fritzi looks surprised.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Man, I WISH libs were commies
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Well, technically they can, and if you have to shuffle the lineup around there are situations where the DH position gets forfeited and they have to.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
At least in soccer it's strategic. I can respect an actor more than an actual crybaby.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
I guess that depends on if Rubenstein et al want to win or just have a mildly profitable baseball team. If they want to win (or at least seem to the public like they want to win), Elias is probably next on the chopping block - obviously getting rid of Hyde didn't do it.
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Taggart Rehnn 🇨🇦🍁 @taggartrehnnauthor.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Sometimes ignorance is bliss...😂😆🤣
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The Onion @theonion.com · 30/06/2026
“Jesus Christ, everything’s happening so fast I can’t even keep track of it—let us catch our breath!” Reds fan Aaron Cartwright said as he scrambled to down a beer and a hot dog during a recent home game in his native Cincinnati
theonion.com
Nation Decides Baseball Too Fast Now
NEW YORK—Just a few years after Major League Baseball introduced sweeping pace-of-play reforms intended to make the sport more compelling, a stressed-out nation confirmed Thursday that baseball games ...
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
The slower you're going when they rear-end you, the less catastrophic that collision will be. The correct response to tailgating is move over if it's safe but otherwise slow down.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
I've been saying I need a bumper sticker that says this
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
That's still a thing on basically all trains in the US except for one company. The problem is that Amtrak has a monopoly on long-distance rail. Any commuter rail in the nation still functions the way you describe.
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The Onion @theonion.com · 27/06/2026
“After several rounds of clinical trials with a control group, we can confirm that anyone marked by the imprint of suffering from Ranggnarr, The God of Mosquitos, is far more likely to be bitten by the insect deity’s loyal worshippers,” said Entomology Department Head Marcus Falwell
theonion.com
Study: Mosquitos More Attracted To People Branded With Mosquito God’s Rune Of Punishment
NEW YORK CITY—Touting the discovery as a breakthrough in understanding the behavioral patterns of the insects, Rockefeller University researchers published a study Friday revealing that mosquitos are ...
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randomly generated oni @ceritusorbis.com · 26/06/2026
spread the good word
If you're 
reading this,
I hope you get
high as hell
and something
great happens
to you today.
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Kayla B @queenofthesouth.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
All children deserve to eat for free at school. ALL OF THEM. I don’t care if their parent is a millionaire. Free lunch.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amanita... Not to be confused with amanita phalloides, which look very similar but are pure white and are one of the deadliest mushrooms we know of.
en.wikipedia.org
Amanita muscaria - Wikipedia
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
About the same amount of poisonous as alcohol. Can make you sick but not deadly.
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Nefarious Means @nefariousmeans.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Never did I think I would see a cure for sickle cell in my lifetime. A friend of mine in fifth grade died from this disease. My parents kept me home from the funeral because they thought I was too young to handle it. Modern science is a miracle. www.wafb.com/2026/06/23/n...
wafb.com
New Orleans man becomes first in Louisiana functionally cured of sickle cell disease
Daniel Cressy, 23, underwent gene therapy at Manning Family Children’s Hospital.
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Kate Gray @hownottodraw.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
why do they have vegan meat in every flavour and type except human. cowards
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Similarly I get frustrated driving in Maryland because the unspoken code is different than it is in MA, but at least it still exists. I don't really know anything about NJ.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
I think "bad" drivers in Massachusetts are aggressive, but they still follow a certain set of rules (which may not exactly line up with the law). In some places bad drivers are unpredictable, which is truly dangerous.
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max @mxwllhnryl.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
Yeah, she has a very specific schtick that was funny once or twice but got old and it doesn't seem like she had anything else to pivot to or mix it up with.
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EcoFriendly West @ecofriendlywest.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
Brent Suter, Los Angeles Angels relief pitcher, is speaking out against fossil fuel advertising in sports: “As an athlete, I care a lot about promoting companies that share my values, and I also care a lot about our planet … I want to represent companies that want to be part of the solution.”
climatecoloredgoggles.com
Meet the baseball player who's tired of promoting Big Oil
In an exclusive interview, Brent Suter becomes the first American pro athlete to speak out against fossil fuel advertising in sports.
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