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Jim Vark 🌌

@mountain.stoats.boats
363 followers 304 following 1.5K posts

I ride bikes in nice places and yell about sports. That's it, that's all.

PostsRepliesMedia
Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 15/10/2026
Barn Cat news: this is what now happens when I do huge, attention-seeking things like "turn on a tap" or "slightly move the bin"
Small white and tabby cat giving me death stare through the kitchen window
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 14/10/2026
well that's an easy decision
Windows dialog box for Epic Online Services uninstaller
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 29/09/2026
my thoughts on the City stuff:
that one wattpad comments tweet but it reads "i want that club Obliterated"
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 26/09/2026
crimes.jpg
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 12/09/2026
welcome to the lmaoring
The Madring squiggly text logo that someone on the design team definitely tried to make look like it says "lmaoring"
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 04/09/2026
oh hello, a new candidate approaches
FB marketplace listing for an absolutely bag of tat white 1992 mitsubishi colt, £300
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 03/09/2026
@magnets.eurosky.social ok boss did I fuck up
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 17/08/2026
Truly impressive levels of 'talking complete bollocks' on display here especially when you discover that the village green pictured, at the time of writing, looked like this:
Photo of village 'green' with entire surface covered in dead, brown grass.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 14/08/2026
need to get my hands on this document to see if we're following just, y'know, internationally recognised standards for this stuff
ISO 22328-1:2020
Security and resilience — Emergency management
Part 1: General guidelines for the implementation of a community-based disaster early warning system
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 13/08/2026
I give up, time to crack the emergency icecream
Simpsons meme

Bart: this is the hottest day of my life
Homer: hottest day of your life SO FAR
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 13/08/2026
So I guess it's the kind of summer where butterflies simply grow on trees
Five tortoiseshell butterflies visible amongst general greenery
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 12/08/2026
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 03/08/2026
Black Sea area seems smaller than I remember according to the BBC
BBC graphic showing Black Sea and surrounds, scale bar indicates 200m and 1000ft to scale, making the Black Sea approximately 1km wide
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 28/07/2026
the sign:
guy standing on the pavement beside a British street, holding a black sign with fluoro 'GOLF SALE' on it
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 25/07/2026
too fierce to handle, yes
Small tabby and white kitten sitting quietly on my leg looking at the cameraSmall tabby and white kitten mid roll playing with a rainbow snake toy looking up at the camera
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 25/07/2026
Feeding time for the definitely extremely feral barn cats
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 15/07/2026
Well that was easier than I expected
A tabby and white kitten sits on a set of electronic scales looking up at the camera. The scales read 728g.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 30/06/2026
look how cute these idiots are
Two tabby cats, one big one small, curled up contemplating a snooze.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 26/06/2026
me, a month ago: hmm that cat looks like she might be pregnant, best leave some food out me now:
The kitten and her mum curled up in my lap, looking up at the camera
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 26/06/2026
Barn Cat update: uh oh
A small white + tabby kitten in front of a bush
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 26/06/2026
oh god oh fuck
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 25/06/2026
take me back ❄️
Snow covered lake under blue skyDeep snow with snow covered mountains behind under blue skySnow covered lake under bright sun in blue sky
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 25/06/2026
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 25/06/2026
just in case anyone needs this today:
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 21/06/2026
new friend Barn Cat!
Small tabby + white cat who has shed her feral nature and is rolled over snuggling while looking up at the camera
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 12/06/2026
Barn Cat update: ok the mood has definitely improved today, are we best friends now?
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 11/06/2026
Barn Cat is unsure if pleased to see me this morning
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 28/05/2026
It's fascinating the way that AI has perfected slop production to such an extent that people think it's the source of the term. All these things were already slop, people have been talking about Marvel slop for a decade at this point, but the firehose of AI slop has made it synonymous.
Text reads: "Vaguely amused to notice that the word slop has expanded from AI to any soulless stuff designed to sell. At least with my kids. Marvel movies = slop. Cakes in Costa = cake slop. A 'name that meme' card game in a charity shop = millennial slop."
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 24/05/2026
the littlest voice
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 16/05/2026
N24 at night is just great, darkness means there's way more cuts to the pits and reminders that people are running monsters like this:
HWA Evo.R in the pits at night, with mechanics surrounding working on the car.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 01/05/2026
slow worm! hey buddy!
A slow worm just chilling in the sun.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 27/04/2026
A new small guy has decided they live in my shed now
Small tabby cat lying on a shelf in a shed, illuminated by a sunbeam. Small tabby cat sleeping on a shelf in the sun.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 22/04/2026
Reassuring to know I've been making my position clear enough tbf
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 15/04/2026
😬
- Update: 5 orgs

- wow it looks like a major hospitality management  platform in europe does this because i just started to get lists of folks and which hotels they are checking in to

good lord people

- i feel an email to the information commissioners office coming on
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 15/04/2026
Hands up if your org does this (no don't)
i was quite surprised to discover that no one had registered deleteduser [dot] com, and was curious to see how many emails i'd get if i registered it, assuming many orgs 'delete' logic probably just overwrote the email address with blahblah@deleteduser.com or similar.

The answer, is at least 3 different orgs in the hour that I've owned that domain and been listening for email.

And yes, all of those emails contain the actual PII of the person who has been 'deleted' :-D
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 09/04/2026
How has it taken me almost 30 years to realise BMW had a Jenny Holzer art car??
1999 BMW V12 LMR art car by Jenny Holzer1999 BMW V12 LMR art car by Jenny Holzer
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 02/04/2026
saw a reindeer though
Young reindeer on snow-patched grass with snowy hills and trees behind
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 02/04/2026
pretty sure it's just everyone else doing it wrong
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 01/04/2026
I am pleased to report I also found one of the Good Roads despite it being an officially warm spring
View of snowy road running off into the distance under blue sky
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 01/04/2026
I am (back) in: Norway 🇳🇴
Snow-covered Lyngen Alps looming through the mist across the waterMore snow-covered Lyngen Alps looming through the mist across the water, with shafts of sunlight breaking through
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 01/04/2026
I am in: Sweden 🇸🇪
View of ice road over frozen river, the border between Sweden and Finland. A footbridge to the right allows crossing in warmer seasons.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 01/04/2026
I am in: Finland 🇫🇮
View over frozen lake under blue sky with scattered clouds, with low rolling hills behind. Two snowmobiles are visible in the distance crossing the lake. Another view over the lake to a different set of hills in the distance
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 30/03/2026
also @jaymc.bsky.social @robynemz.bsky.social your lot have been out and about way up north
Red nordic hut with spraypainted "YNWA" text on facing wall, with fjord and snowcapped mountain behind
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 30/03/2026
came better prepared for snow this year but the snow wasn't playing ball (this year/last year comparison)
View looking down dry rock slab path with rope handrail over small town with sea and mountains behind. View looking up rock slab path disappearing above. Similar view to first picture but with several inches of snow on the ground. Similar location to second picture with snow on the ground.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 29/03/2026
update:
View across the water to Arctic Cathedral in Tromsø in the gloom under clouds, with snow covered hills behind
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 17/03/2026
Very funny that this inversion has massacred me, as I had to quit going on hikes with a friend a decade ago because she was simply too fast and I was clearly annoying her with my pace every time.
Text reads: "Blair Braverman is a writer, adventurer and dogsled musher who has competed in the Iditarod and Kobuk 440. (She took 36th place in the 2019 Iditarod, becoming the first Jewish woman to finish the storied, 1,000-mile (1,609km) race.) “Personally, if I were with a man and he wandered away from me on a mountain, I’d be more worried for him than me,” she said. “I think it’s interesting that [the term] assumes that the woman is the one with less capability.”"
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 07/03/2026
pov you are a cat bed
There is a tabby cat staring at you as you lay on the sofa. Do not make any sudden moves.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 27/02/2026
warm out
View of mountain behind loch surrounded by windblown high grass under blue sky
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 26/02/2026
most fucked up cuck chair I've seen yet
It's an armchair with no arms? With like... 4 inch long legs. And it's orange.
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Jim Vark 🌌 @mountain.stoats.boats · 26/02/2026
Time to retire from duolingo thanks to their insistence on embracing AI garbage, this counts as having completed it though right?
Duolingo 2500 day streak
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