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Kahn Johnson

@kahnjohnson.bsky.social
468 followers 375 following 2.7K posts

Journalist, writer, therapist

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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
"I think we should help other dogs by fostering one" she said, detailing all the ways it was a good idea. I expressed reasoned scepticism, not least the fact we would probably struggle to not just adopt the poor thing. "No no, this is definitely just fostering" Took her a week. He's now ours.
This be Raggy. He's old, this is his first ever home and he has vet bills in his future which a fosterer wouldn't have to cover but an owner does.
He's a scruff, brown and white version of Sprocket. Like an ambling, tatty rag rug.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
If you can't decide what to have for lunch, cook both options while you think about it. #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
On the left in a shallow white bowl is some pasta, with This Isn't Chick'n and Bac'n (don't quote me on the spellings) and toasted pine nuts sprinkled/dumped on top.
On the right, in a deeper red bowl with a white interior is a tofu stir-fry. Smoked tofu, peppers, mushrooms, cashews, udon noodles, garlic, chilis and sweet chilli sauce
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
And today we celebrate New @davidmbarnett.bsky.social Book Day. Probably with wine #BookSky
The cover of Twisted Pike (black with white writing and a red dog on it), the latest novel by David Barnett
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Me? Absolutely fine. No stress-related retail therapy going on here no no no....
So, from left we have new albums by Brian Fallon (Not Bad For New Jersey), Neil Young (Second Song), Linkin Park (Unshatter), Europe (Come This Madness) and Anthrax (Carsum Perficio)
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
One of these was mind-blowing and amazing, the other fun if headfuckingly baffling. Slice + Dice in Norwich is a great way to spend a morning. #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
Tofu Florentine.
A muffin, with sliced tofu - prepared in house so it's like an egg - hollandaise sauce and asparagus. Then black sesame seeds sprinkled over.
Absolutely stunningThe game of Wyrmspan in full swing. By which I mean to people stumbling along trying to work out WTF is going on.
Great game! Next time we're playing the bird one
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
"Real time 24/7 updates" claims the bot account posting the wrong score more than 24hours late. Then there's the photos.... Maybe AI isn't quite ready to take over the world #LFC #RedSky
A screenshot of a post from The World Eye, in which Liverpool apparently beat Bournemouth 2-0 (it was 1-0), the picture of Iraola looks like it comes from a 1940s scifi drama and the picture of two Liverpool players looks like a still from a Ken Loach film.
And the kits are 20 years out of date
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
So he's in the top three for personal xG, chances created and total shots in a tight game with few chances. Useless. Get rid.
Match stats showing Wirtz had the third highest personal xG behind Isak and Christie, ranked top for chances created and was third - behind Christie and Isak this time - for total shots.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
After reading about @janehill.bsky.social and her fun at the Christie shindig, thought I'd share my latest essential purchases...
A pile of Miss Marple, stylised with pastel shades.
From the top down we have The Moving Finger, A Murder Is Announced, They Do It With Mirrors, A Pocket Full Of Rye, 4.50 From Paddington, The Mirror Crack'd From Side To Side, A Caribbean Mystery, At Bertram's Hotel, Nemesis, Sleeping Murder, and Midd Marple's Final Cases.

The Murder At The Vicarage, The Thirteen Problems and The Body In The Library are already on the shelf having been read. My new set of Poirot books, all witj black covers, currently arranged in piles waiting to be read.
Pile one, on the left, is - top to bottom - The Mystery Of The Blue Train, Peril At End House, Lord Edgware Dies, Murder On The Orient Express, The ABC Murders, Murder In Mesopotomia, Cards On The Table, Three Act Tragedy, Death In The Clouds, Murder In The Mews, and Dumb Witness.
The middle pile is Death On The Nile, Appointment With Death, Hercule Poirot's Christmas, Sad Cypress, One, Two, Buckle My Shoe, Evil Under The Sun, Five Little Pigs, The Hollow, The Labours Of Hercules, and Taken At The Flood.
The third pile, on the right, has Mrs McGinty's Dead, After The Funeral, Hickory Dickory Dock, Dead Man's Folly, Cat Among The Pigeons, The Clocks, Third Girl, Hallowe'en Party, Elephants Can Remember, Poirot's Early Cases, and Curtain: Poirot's Last Case.

The Murder On The Links is on the shelf having been read. I can't find the few remaining titles in the right covers so I'll wait...
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
*cough 😂
My post from an hour ago that says exactly the same thing 😁
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Thanks to Røry, @greenlungband.bsky.social , @themeffs.bsky.social , @classicrockmag.bsky.social and my utter heroes at @okcomics.bsky.social this is now shaping up to being an excellent Saturday. Potential #LFC result not withstanding. And once the dog's been walked...
The (numbered & signed) vinyl of the new Røry album Bloodletting stands before the latest issue of Classic Rock magazine, fanned across the top of which are the latest issues of Spider-Woman, Poison Ivy, Harley Quinn, Catwoman and Batwoman, on top of which are the CDs of the new albums by Green Lung, Røry again and The Meffs
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
I'll need @silverduke.bsky.social to check my maths, but I make that four keepers #LFC #RedSky
The list of Liverpool's Premier League squad for the coming season: Araujo, Barcola, Alisson, Bradley, Chambers, Chiesa, Ekitike, Endo, Frimpong, Gakpo, Gomez, Gravenberch, Isak, Jaros, Kerkez, Mabaya, Mac Allister, Mamardashvili, McConnell, Munoz, Szoboszlai, Tsimikas, van Dijk, Wirtz, Woodman
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
#LFC #RedSky
A picture of Liverpool's Director of Football.
To the right of his perfectly-sculpted grey hair it reads "Have you tried buying a right winger and it wasn't your fault?"
Across the bottom it reads "Call Football Directors 4 U"
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
It's a lentil and tofu salad. Might be one of the most #vegan things I have ever thrown together. Needs the olives and some soy sauce to give it a kick. So healthy it's just wrong #VeganFood #VeganSky
I mean, where to begin here? It looks like a beige mess - yellow lentils, sweetcorn, smoked tofu, tomatoes - or something my dog threw up.
And yet, delicious
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
My favourite Meffs T-shirt suddenly became available in black. So obviously....
My new T-shirt from punk rabble-rousers The Meffs. It reads "We'll be less activist if you be less shit"
Will be worn with immense pride
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Player of the match #LFC #RedSky
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Injury prone, eh? #LFC #RedSky
Career stats for Ronald Araujo at Barca. Short version - averages 30+ games a season, scores goals
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Some recent cookings Honestly, no idea what that third one is. It's smokey tempeh, black beans, chipotle paste, tomatoes... It's Mexicanish, but I have no idea what I actually created. Answers on a postcard.... #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
This Isn't chick'n, bacon and mushroom pasta with parmesan and pine nutsA creamy tofu and mushroom curry with a load of coriander leaves stirred through it
Served on home-cooked chipsThe Mexicanish thing - tempeh, black beans, tomatoes, and there's a jacket potato under there somewhere
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
A sadly forgotten 90s band whose debut single barely scraped into the top 30 #LFC #RedSky
Curtis Jones on the left, Ryan Gravenberch in the middle and Dominic Szboslzlai model the new LFC away shirt somewhere in New York looking for all the world like a boyband that never quite made it
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
"Missed"? What, they were out? Had gone away for the weekend? Forgot to buy rain tickets?
Over a picture of a brown, dry slope - with a browner, drier path wending its way up the slope to the right of the picture - a young couple walk hand in hand across the dry land. A headline reads "UK's most parched regions miss chance for rain ahead of next heatwave". 
The paragraph below this gentle apocalyptic setting reads "Some of the driest regions of the UK have missed their chances for rain ahead of another heatwave beginning this week".

Missed. Implying there was something they could have done to get rained on.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
♥️🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ #LFC #YNWA #RedSky
The LFC club crest overlayed on the Intersex-inclusive Progress Pride Flag, which the club is using as it's icon on all social media channels - much to the annoyance of people who don't think YNWA applies to everyone
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
It's @defleppard.bsky.social and Extreme tonight - but what to wear....
On the left is a Def Leppard T-shirt from the last tour (I think). Darkish blue with the famous logo across the top and a collage of band members on top of the famous Hysteria design. On the right is an Extreme T-shirt from 1995 depicting a clown looking down the barrel of a pistol.
Yes, it does still fit
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
Would it kill them to make this dishwasher safe? #LFC #RedSky #FirstWorldProblems
The new matchday mug. Smaller than the normal mug size, but has the same muted red colour of the shirt and same random white flecks. Has LIVERPOOL FC 26-26 written across the front
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Fuck me it's actually something useful #LFC #RedSky
To the left is a red cardboard tube featuring the LFC crest, the words ALL RED, and the letters W (at the top), N (right at the bottom) and A. To the right is a posh red travel mug with corrugated sides and a black lid
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
They aren't sure?????
Screenshot of a Guardian headline that reads: Reform investigates whether Makerfield candidate's sexist posts were costly
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
All I keep thinking is..... why? #LFC #RedSky
The new LFC home shirt, which for reasons I really don't want to think about too much, has been created as a crop top. Because obviously.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
What? #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
So, a quick pizza for lunch turned into.... A new brand of frozen pizza (right, already forgot the name, don't recommend), the last of the frozen chips (front), four hash browns (left) brought back from a brunch by Herself, and a big mushroom (centre) which was also a refugee from the brunch. Hidden under the mushroom is what I chose to believe was a small bit of soggy cauliflower. Because vegetables are important.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 13/05/2026
It's May, so obviously the rain has upgraded to hail. If that doesn't call for steak and chips... #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
A, let's call it generous, portion of homemade chips, rainbow chard, and a large brown block which is actually a rather delicious This Isn't peppered steak.
Ketchup was added to the chips after the picture was taken because I'm not an animal
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
This kid speaks for all of us
To the left, Trump yaks on. Behind, spanning to the right, are three bored looking adults. Then we hit the kids. Kid one is yawning, the second looks bored, the third? The little girl in the yellow T-shirt? With an expression that will serve her well in the years to come she just looking at Mad Gramps with a face that screams 'you are so full of shit and I can't believe I have to be here listening'
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
Took the dog, did a voting
Third strikes the traditional polling day pose of Dog By Big Sign That Says Polling Station
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
Won't lie, that's one sexy playlist pile #MusicSky
From the left, bookended by an alert Hellboy and an anxious Gollum, we have:
Fish - Vigil In A Wilderness Of Mirrors (2024 remix book version)
Iron Maiden - Dance Of Death 
Pink Floyd - Dark Side Of The Moon
Jethro Tull - Benefit
Fish - Internal Exile (big ass book version again)
Iron Maiden - A Matter Of Life And Death 
Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
Jethro Tull - Living In The Past (biggie book version)
Fish - A Feast Of Consequences (big book version)
Iron Maiden - The Book Of Souls (hardback edition)
Pink Floyd - Animals
Jethro Tull - Too Old To Rock n Roll
Fish - Weltschmerz (big book etc)
Iron Maiden - Senjutsu (hardback edition)
Jethro Tull - Songs From The Wood 
Pink Floyd - The Wall
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 20/04/2026
"The result wasn't a true reflection of the game" Whatever you need to tell yourself, Dave. #LFC #RedSky
Match stats for the Merseyside Derby.
Everton's xG was 0.8 to Liverpool's 1.45.
Liv had 14 shots to Eva's 10. Six were on target, only four for Ev.
Both keepers made three saves, Ev won 19 aerial duels to Liv's 14. Liv committed more fouls (12 to eight) but had more corners (six to Ev's one)
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
For a 3am idea, not too shabby.... #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
A bowl with chipotle tempeh with peppers, tomatoes and mushrooms, served with lime and chilli rice.
Yes, that's rice with chilli flakes and freshly-squeezed lime juice stirred in.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
Because sometimes you just want something quick and simple.... #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
A white bowl containing wholewheat spaghetti, on which sits wilted spinach, then This Isn't bacon and some mushrooms, topped off with toasted pine nuts. Because obviously.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
The cover of this month's Mojo magazine with Jane Hill's name all over it
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 06/04/2026
What, they're taking the scenic route?
Guardian headline reads "Artemis 2 astronauts travel farther from earth than any human has before" 

Which is confusing given this isn't man's first trip to the moon....

....or is it....?
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
The bi-annual 'really need a herb garden' project is underway. Let's see if I can remember to water things this time....
Golden thyme, a couple of rosemary plants and something I've completely forgotten. Bodes wellGarlic chives in the middle, surrounded by sage, thyme, oregano and.... nope, forgotten that one as well. Five might be one too many
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
How delightfully presidential
A report from the Guardian in which it says the President of the United States posted the following on Truth Social:

Tuesday will be Power Plant Day and Bridge Day, all wrapped up in one, in Iran. There will be nothing like it!!! Open the Fuckin' Strait, you crazy bastards, or you'll be living in Hell - JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah. President DONALD J. TRUMP
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
First a football match to endure, and then some light reading care of @okcomics.bsky.social - at least the day will end well....
A fine spread of comics, fanned out in anticipation of them being read - plus it looks good in a photograph.
From left we have the latest issues of Poison Ivy, Harley + Ivy, Harley Quinn, Catwoman and Batwoman
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
Or, if your girlfriend gets to them first, one egg. #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
A box of Mummy Meegz Chuckie Eggs. In the bottom left corner is a little 'sell' box telling the lucky buyer the box contains three eggs. 
Reader, I did not get three eggs
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 01/04/2026
April fool!
Front page of The Guardian with the headline "Trump says wIll end in 'two or three weeks'."
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 26/03/2026
Soup makers are just the best #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
A bowl of chick'n and sweetcorn soup. Lumps of This Is Chick'n and loads of sweetcorn kernels squish up against butter beans and diced onion in a very full bowl.
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
Again 😂😂😂 What is it with people thinking Chiesa is the fucking answer and not being able to debate the fact he fucking isn't 😂 #LFC #RedSky
My reply reads: Chiesa can't play three games in a week. I'm not saying Gakpo deserves his place, I'm saying there are reasons why he's on the pitch. Yes, Wirtz can play there, but then who plays in Wirtz's position. Dom? Then who does the Dom thing? And so it goes on. If Mo was fit he'd have started today, not Cody
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
Finally, it's time to return to the dark, creepy, sinister world of the surprisingly genial @davidmbarnett.bsky.social #BookSky💙📚
The cover of Scratch Moss, the latest book from brilliant David Barnett
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 19/03/2026
So it turns out he's not even in control of the war he claims he started which he's already won but wants to win more... Image care of @chatham58.bsky.social
A post from the toddler in chief. To save you having to read the whole thing, he's basically saying that he didn't know Israel was going to bomb that vital gas field, Israel won't bomb it again, Iran had no business retaliating against Qatar and if they do that again he'll blow up the gas field he didn't want Israel to blow up in the first place.

Yes, that makes all the sense you think it does
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
Saddened by the news of the death of Phil Campbell, we stuck 1916 on and started cooking. Not totally sure what was created, mind.... Still, tasted good. #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
Tempeh cooked in Moroccan seasoning, with black beans, peppers, onion, garlic, and sweetcorn. Served with 'coriander rice' - black and brown rice, with olive oil and dried coriander stirred through
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
Chip shop is finally open #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
A box overflowing with fresh chips, covered in tomato and curry sauces. Top left sit two battered vegan sausages. Bottom left lurks a welcoming lump of mushy peas
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
Lifestyle aids for the older lady
Ghost (white and mottled dog who may have once been a Littlest Hobo tribute act) about to trot from sofa to flaw via some firm foam stepsPotato (big black dog who looks like a bear) enjoys nomming out of her holiday EasyEats bowl
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
Valentine's brunch Not of my making, went to The Greengrocers in Norwich #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
Clockwise from top: field mushrooms, tomato, beans in a little pot, two sausages, a pot of spread for the toast, bubble & squeak, wholemeal toast and smashed avocado. In the centre lies the spinach, which all vegan breakfasts have even though none of us have the stuff at home
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
Happy Valentine's 😁 #Caturday
A Tarot card, number 7 The Lovers, showing a grumpy black cat pushing away the face of the human that is holding them. The human is attempting to kiss the cat. The cat is having none of it thank you
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Kahn Johnson @kahnjohnson.bsky.social · 09/02/2026
Couldn't remember if leek and potato soup was chunky or smooth. So made both. #Vegan #VeganFood #VeganSky
Four bowls of soup - two at the front are smooth leek and potato soup, the two at the back are chunky version with loads of potatoes and leeks floating about
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