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James Norton

@jrnorton.bsky.social
2.5K followers 525 following 784 posts

Editor of Heavy Table (@heavytable.com), author of Lake Superior Flavors, generally in pursuit of tacos.

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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
A bit alarming when you find yourself yelling at the TV, and the topic is "pie." But that episode was profoundly wrong.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
All the hallmarks of a fun episode: smart, likable killer, villainous victim, Columbo getting to appreciate the bad guy despite himself and learning a little bit about wine along the way. An all-timer!
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Finally: an auto-tuned Columbo-themed novelty track. I guess that sounds sarcastic, but I'm actually stoked. My favorite episode (Any Old Port in a Storm) even!
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columbo screenshots @columboscreens.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Glad to hear they're maintaining standards! heavytable.com/giordanos-in...
heavytable.com
Giordano’s in Uptown, Minneapolis – Heavy Table
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Reposting this here for anyone who hasn't watched it recently, this is how you do a theme song / opening credits: youtu.be/vMWc4Ol7yCM?...
youtu.be
Bosch Main Title | Amazon Originals | Can't Let Go
YouTube video by Bhatkele Satkele
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
My wife and I literally yelled this exact thing. "What are you doing?! Get out of the road!!"
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Yes! There's all this "they're gonna kill us all!" and then stopping for water, visiting grandpa's house, getting a quick cuppa, etc. etc. Similarly, if Taverner doesn't put you back into the system IMMEDIATELY it's an insane crisis, not a weird little thing that happened.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
It really has all the hallmarks of something dashed off during a coffee break that was itself in the middle of a more important meeting, probably about licensing rights. I think they should just switch to the opening credits for Bosch, which were amazing, and still sort of set the right mood.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
It got me thinking that maybe it's a clever in joke - a criminally on-the-nose theme song for a show all about double and triple crosses and encoded meanings - but I think it was simply "oh my God we got Jagger to do the theme" and then Jagger just winging it rather than writing something.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Legitimately aggravating because it's been such a solid and tightly-wound show for five seasons. I will say that the Mick Jagger theme song has always been terrible. "Hey Mick, just sing the basic plot of the show, OK? Here's the elevator pitch we used."
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
this whole season feels a lot more Whovian - unearned sentiment, weird pacing, general sloppiness in terms of character motivation. the fact that there's an actual wise-cracking kid in the mix is just the headstone on the grave.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
calling it now: Jackson Lamb and Scrappy Doo getting into a farting contest is when Slow Horses jumped the shark. I think a once excellent show is cooked.
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Herr Spooky Gunther Büergers @calamityjon.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Peter Falk as Columbo playing a tuba.
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Jess Fink🍉🌈 @jessfink.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
🎃
A 7 panel comic by the artist. First panel: The artist is running from a distance towards a group of people playing basketball in the park. The artist is holding a pumpkin above their head and screaming "AAAAAAAAA". Second panel: The artist has leapt up and is in position to slam dunk the pumpkin into the basketball hoop. Panel three: the pumpkin splatters violently against the backboard of the basketball hoop, sending orange pumpkin goop everywhere. Panel four: the players stand staring, covered in pumpkin goop and shocked. Panel five: the artist stares at them wide-eyed, also covered in the goop and says "it's October FIRST". Their hand reaches towards their face. Panel six: the artist rips off their own face like a rubber mask to reveal a skeleton beneath. Panel 7: the group of players stand shocked and horrified, watching as the skeleton falls to the ground in a pile of bones, the sound effects says "CLATTER".
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Michael Spicer @michaelspicer.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Most TV is just this now.
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taylr @taylordahlin.com · 28/09/2026
mukhtar ibrahim, founder of the sahan journal, and ubah ali, a former WCCO reporter, have just launched the somali brief, an independent media outlet where somali americans can tell their own stories www.thesomalibrief.com
thesomalibrief.com
The Somali Brief
The Somali Brief is a digital-first media platform covering the stories shaping Somali American life.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
don't sleep on Costco Business Center. The "business" is the business of delicious food.
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 16/09/2026
17 new public bathrooms. Across all five boroughs. Because you can’t wait — and you shouldn’t have to.
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Gabe Fernandez @thelatinochild.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Between Rhea Seehorn, Stephen Root, and Matthew Rhys, the Emmys have briefly redeemed my belief in the underlying goodness of humanity. Incredibly well-deserved awards!! Widow's Bay is crazy good! Justice for Kim Wexler! Ah, man. Lovely stuff.
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Ian Boudreau @ianboudreau.com · 15/09/2026
YEAH
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Saw this at the Trylon last night, it holds up, and will always hold up. What a film!
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taylr @taylordahlin.com · 13/09/2026
i already like sagal’s strong coffee and bur but love them now for this rejection of AI in favor of a charming, hand drawn menu board instead stop in if you’re at cedarfest! we must support businesses who don’t use AI
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
This ambitious sprawl reminds me of both The Ladies' Paradise by Zola and Martin Dressler by Millhauser - stories of overwhelmingly grand, complex, but ultimately efficient economic engines that are basically self-contained worlds. Both books are great reads!
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columbo screenshots @columboscreens.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
It is not cheap to subscribe to, but I fork over increasing piles of money every year because they're really thorough and pretty fair. Not many publications walking the ideological tightrope anymore, it's a pleasant throwback in that way.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
So much rides on portioning. If that's a substantial egg sandwich, like a tasty, satisfying meal of an egg sandwich, I think that's OK. The Peg egg sandwich at the Fair was $8, which felt great, actually. But the $4 bacon add-on feels steep.
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s. e. smith @sesmith.lol · 08/09/2026
All else aside there is nothing I want or need genAI to do for me. I like reading. I like doing research. I like playing around in spreadsheets. I like interviewing people. I like writing. I like doing these things for myself because I take pleasure in the doing and they make me a better thinker.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
hell yes, a rare and indirect Burnett Dairy Cooperative shoutout
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BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL AKA PRESIDENT FOOTBALL @edsbs.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Reacher singing this while beating you to death with a running push mower
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
100% agree!
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
On one hand I don't disagree, on the other hand I started with season 2, which was utterly ludicrous throughout, so my tolerance for goofy plotting with this series is really high. I'm still digging it.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
what about the library shelf clampdown thing! I had the visceral joy of calling that before it happened, it was a thrill that for me justified the season as a whole
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
"Hey Mr. DJ, I Thought You Said We Had a Deal" by TMBG ("Chess Piece Face" / "Rabid Child" / "World's Address," all also by TMBG)
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Norm Charlatan @normcharlatan.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Our county runs monthly fix-it clinics where you can bring in broken items and handy volunteers will try and fix or mend them. Our food processor stopped working, and a kind, older guy walked me through troubleshooting, identified a problem with the handle mechanism, and fixed it right there.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
I know!! That was my first choice, they were out, I had to get the long john, I somehow survived.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
I don't write many personal essays. But when I do, it's because something legitimately moved me. To my surprise: trying to figure out why we cover something as absurd as the Fair led me to some strange places.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
turns out they were out of cinnamon twists, so chocolate long john it was. No complaints! Apple fritter = also good.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
All that said, my GOD is this a trivial dispute. Time to put it aside and worry about the big things in life: whether to get a chocolate long john or a cinnamon twist doughnut from Cub Foods.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Cities can do whatever they can get away with, just as corporations can do whatever they can get away with. But "we can get away with it" is not a defense. The curb in front of my house has cars parked on it all year! I think it's OK that they're parking for free. Whatever! Hospitality, man.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Spending the morning parked in a Substack comment section yelling at someone from Falcon Heights about their $25 street parking charge during the Fair. Look, just be cheerful about it! "Hey, suckers, if you don't like the fee, just park somewhere else! Otherwise, pay up ya mugs!"
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Cheers, and thanks Bill! This one should be free for all, if memory serves.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
but only one new food is gross AND $22, and that's the food I have lowkey fallen in love with after the fact, the Australian Battered Nightmare Potato.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
It's worse than that, some of the new foods ARE gross!
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#1 Lifelong Houston Cougs Fan Brandi 😾 @itsthebrandi.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Subscribe to @heavytable.com for the most comprehensive state fair food preview from the actual day of the fair
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Fantastic to have you back in the mix!!
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Would love to know how it earned that second star in the Strib. To me, it's a quintessential one star or four star dish, depending upon how bleak your sense of humor is.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
It's the dish we can't stop talking about! Even though we would like to.
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James Norton @jrnorton.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
One more random candid from the day, absolutely the hardest working-looking shot of the team in the field that I've ever seen. Reflective of our excellence? I think so!!
Seven or eight people in matching light green T-shirts crowd a table full of food and beverages from the Minnesota State Fair, deploying cameras, pens, notebooks, and phones as they document every atom of flavor and appearance. Brenda Johnson / Heavy Table
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