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Grant Alpaugh

@grantalpaugh.bsky.social
2.8K followers 1.2K following 87 posts

Phone Fuck

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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Humor Satire Memes @funnysnarkyjoke.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
Artist: Tina Menzel
An illustration of a weary skeleton sitting at a table next to a tabby cat.

The skeleton sits on the left, resting its skull in its hand, looking down exhaustedly at a white bowl filled with colorful, loop-shaped breakfast cereal. A signature on the side of its skull reads "@TIINA_MENZEL". A speech bubble from the skeleton reads, "WHAT A YEAR, HUH?"

On the right, a domestic tabby cat sits next to a steaming yellow mug, looking up at the skeleton with wide eyes. Its speech bubble responds, "...IT'S MAY."
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
they did it. they finally did it. the jersey that made me a gooner. #plchampions #coyg #myplmornings
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
media.tenor.com
a man in a suit is sitting in a chair with a book in front of him and the website sharktankgifts.com is visible
ALT: a man in a suit is sitting in a chair with a book in front of him and the website sharktankgifts.com is visible
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 02/03/2026
complete insanity
Pres Trump told me tonight the US had identified possible candidates to take over Iran, but they were killed in the initial attack.

"The attack was so successful it knocked out most of the candidates," Trump told me. "It's not going to be anybody that we were thinking of because they are all dead. Second or third place is dead."
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Luke BOO 👻 ber @coolhand.bsky.social · 17/02/2026
“now a major motion picture” shoot me in the face
The cover of wuthering heights with a now a major motion picture badge on it
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Brian Grubb @briancgrubb.bsky.social · 17/02/2026
it is important to remember that every social media platform stinks in its own unique way or ways the key is to find the one that stinks in the way that you find the most tolerable
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 16/02/2026
imagine being a beautiful cow and ending up as a boxy, three-button USA flag sport coat with a collar gap and the bottom-most button fastened
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 30/01/2026
jesus christ 🤦‍♂️
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 04/12/2025
media.tenor.com
a man in a suit has a purple pocket square on his chest
Alt: keenan thompson authoritatively says “stop it”
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
good grief
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
media.tenor.com
a man wearing glasses and a suit stands in front of a police badge
Alt: will farrell says “watch your mouth” sternly.
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 24/08/2025
Know your rights, Chicago. Ask for a warrant. Record the goons from a safe distance. We don’t want or need them here.
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
WeRateDogs @weratedogs.com · 22/08/2025
Here are the Top 5 Dogs of the week!
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Heather Cox Richardson (TDPR) @hcrichardson.bsky.social · 20/08/2025
An idea:
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 17/08/2025
media.tenor.com
a man in a suit and bow tie is standing in front of a blue background
Alt: bill murray in a tuxedo holding a glass of whiskey and having his picture taken
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 17/08/2025
media.tenor.com
a man wearing glasses and a suit stands in front of a police badge
Alt: will farrell sternly says “watch your mouth.”
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Niall Harbison @niallharbison.bsky.social · 12/08/2025
Things are really starting to look up for Mr Anthony Hopkins
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 10/08/2025
jesus christ
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Kit Whitfield - fantasy writer @kitwhitfield.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
A tombstone in Bridgnorth, Shropshire, photographed by Andy Darby. Note the border inscription.
Gravestone inscribed: Alistair Stephen Fabian Mitchell. 13-6-1957, 10-2-2019. Barrister of the Middle Temple. My brain, socialist. My heart, anarchist. My eyes, pacifist. My blood, revolutionary. 

Around the edge, the legend: The only man in British legal history to be convicted of biting a policeman with someone else’s teeth.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
that’s a hell of a thing
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
jesus
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 08/08/2025
media.tenor.com
michael jordan is wearing a suit and tie and smiling .
Alt: michael jordan is wearing a suit and tie saying “stop it. get some help.”
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 30/07/2025
Holy shit, they did it. They wrote the headline.
NYC Mass Shooting Was Nearly Impossible to Prevent, Experts Say
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Niall Harbison @niallharbison.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
RIP Cindy Crawford. She had a golden end to her life. She sadly passed with her beloved family today 💔
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 07/07/2025
sir, your phlebitis
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 06/07/2025
just because he’s nuts doesn’t mean he voted for stein, derek.
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Scott Smith @stampergr.bsky.social · 05/07/2025
On July 5th 1948 Larry Doby became the first Black player in the American League, roughly 3 months after Jackie Robinson made his debut in the NL. #LarryDobyDay
Two baseball cards of Hall of Famer Larry Doby. The top shows him during his time playing for Cleveland, he has blue hat with red "C" 

The bottom card is from his time with Chicago White Sox. His had is blue with a red bill, and red C.
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @aoc.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
Freedom from kings. Freedom from fascism. Power to the people forever. ♥️ Happy Independence Day 🇺🇸
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
derek, will there be any advice that does not involve become anaemic?
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
big boss from metal geat solid saluting at the foot of a grave.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 29/06/2025
#guardiansbaseball
enjoying the beautiful day at progressive field
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
sir, your phlebitis.
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Nick Varga @karaoke-god.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 09/06/2025
i am thinking of you
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
media.tenor.com
a man wearing glasses and a suit stands in front of a police badge
Alt: will ferrell says “watch your mouth,” in a threatening manner.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 16/05/2025
media.tenor.com
a man in a white shirt stands in front of a crowd wearing a pink hat with the letter b on it
Alt: judge smalls in caddyshack exasperatedly says “well… we’re waiting!” in a taunting manner
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
mac from it’s always sunny in philadelphia says “god dammit”
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
media.tenor.com
a man speaking into a microphone with the word good written on his face
Alt: donald glover saying “good.” in a menacing tone.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 06/05/2025
*waves at the general state of the world*
media.tenor.com
a man is sitting at a table with his eyes closed and says yeah
Alt: tim robinson nods his head and says yeah
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 06/05/2025
having worked on campaigns myself, i can confirm that “veep” was the most accurate political show ever made.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 02/05/2025
i think it is instructive that he suffered a traumatic brain injury and became markedly more conservative…
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 23/04/2025
yes, well.
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Justin Sherin @wychstreet.bsky.social · 21/04/2025
Fordham posted this, lol
pope francis grins as he tries on a Fordham basketball jersey
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Reposted by Grant Alpaugh
Stealth40k @stealth40k.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
Nintendo paid homage to the 1991 Paul Rudd SNES commercial by bringing him back to make one for Switch 2. This is amazing.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 19/04/2025
ad maiorem dei gloriam, sir.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
(complementary)
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
i think this errs only in that it gives these people credit for having a plan, when pretty much all evidence available suggests otherwise.
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
christ wept
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Grant Alpaugh @grantalpaugh.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
yes, sir.
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