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Michael Gorwitz

@gorwitz.bsky.social
103 followers 119 following 77 posts

A young man that you all know as Joe the Policeman from the "What's Going Down" episode of "That's My Momma"

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Curt Hogg @cyrthogg.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Manny Machado blew a bubble. The fans in the front row reached out. Garrett Mitchell brought it back.
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Curt Hogg @cyrthogg.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Pat Murphy on the ball hitting the cable for an out. “Ueck decided to put a hand on it. Thanks Ueck.”
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Jesse @requiemarm.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
you shouldn’t learn about bands from shady TikTok manipulation, you should learn about bands by hanging out with a girl you like but are also extremely afraid of
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Merriam-Webster @merriam-webster.com · 17/09/2026
She's a 10, but she corrects people's grammar.
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Chris Hayes @chrislhayes.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
It’s been driving me crazy for a while that this is not a bigger story so I tried to do something about it. I think it’s pretty jaw dropping. youtu.be/bFpHYSoi2CI?...
youtu.be
‘Ghastly untrue’: Hayes torches GOP senator’s 9/11 conspiracy theories
YouTube video by MS NOW
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Curt Hogg @cyrthogg.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Final: Brewers 4, Cubs 3 (10) Miz shoved. Jackson Chourio may not be real. Garrett Mitchell has a cannon. Luis Lara redeems himself. Absolute cinema of a ballgame. The record: 90-56
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Jason Kirk @jasonkirk.fyi · 08/09/2026
Lack of replay is awesome. Was the call right? Who gives a shit, move along
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Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Sometimes a friend will bring their small child to my apartment, and I always feel bad because once they're done petting my dog and reading the three picture books I own it's like...I don't know what to tell you, kid. You wanna send an email or something?
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Grace Robertson 🏳️‍⚧️ @graceonfootball.com · 29/08/2026
he's going to saudi arabia, but liverpool should sack richard hughes anyway, just so he can experience being sacked.
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Grace Robertson 🏳️‍⚧️ @graceonfootball.com · 29/08/2026
frimpong the kind of player to make you a true believer in the bundesliga tax
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Ryan Nanni @celebrityhottub.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
The original problematic streamer
The mean kid from The Wizard, wearing his dumbass Nintendo Powerglove
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Mark Yarm @markyarm.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Gen X Hemingway:
Twitter pic: Butthole Surfers t-shirt, never worn
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Michael Gorwitz @gorwitz.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Charley. He does this a lot
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HELL Kennedy @helenkennedy.com · 21/08/2026
The Trump administration fired the editor of Stars & Stripes. The military newspaper's publisher, who announced he would retire earlier this week, was also fired. The paper had revealed the deplorable conditions on the USS Lincoln, embarrassing Hegseth and Trump.
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Michael Gorwitz @gorwitz.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Me at the end of every first date
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Michael Gorwitz @gorwitz.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
The Germans need to come up with a word for “the disappointment at realizing the text you received is actually just the confirmation code you requested”
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Wabi Sabi For Costco Frankenstein Heads @wabisabi4robots.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Werner Herzog with a word balloon
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Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
FIFA has a funny set-up where every country gets exactly one vote which means small countries are way overrepresented and you can hang on to power by promising little giveaways to those countries and their reps. Thankfully no similar system exists in the United States government, that would be bad
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 23/07/2026
the living daylights is also the best bond theme
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Jelly Pumpkins @jellyzedsy.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
I cannot stop laughing at this. They were so close to cracking lmao #InfoWars #MAJA
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Jason Kirk @jasonkirk.fyi · 17/07/2026
"Four or five non-wins" would be a generously forgiving nickname for all but three of Tommy Tuberville's 21 seasons
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Robin Wigglesworth @robinwigglesworth.ft.com · 15/07/2026
👌👌👌👌👌👌👌
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Michael Gorwitz @gorwitz.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
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Michael Gorwitz @gorwitz.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
with no more evening soccer I just watched my third consecutive Jason Bourne movie. Im officially a mid 40s white man. It’s joever
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Mina Kimes @minakimes.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
No soccer until Tuesday
Sad Pablo Escobar
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CJ Fogler @cjzero.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Harry Kane upside down on the side of his head with one hand down and the other on his legRaygun upside down in the Olympics on her head with both hands on the ground and her feet/legs in different positions
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Mike Goodman @themlg.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
Man that dude tweeting about how fifa did the right thing while his admin pulls every insane level it can find to turn Balogun into a non-citizen can really fuck the fuck right off.
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Alex Ip 葉清霖 @alexip718.com · 05/07/2026
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 01/07/2026
"Every serious legal mind must inevitably face a fundamental choice: Read the Constitution and apply its words as the bedrock laws of the land, or transcend its tired text and interpret the super-secret invisible version that tells you exactly what you want to hear."
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The US Constitution Is for Simple Folk Still Burdened by the Belief That Words Have Meaning
“Every serious legal mind must inevitably face a fundamental choice: Read the Constitution and apply its words as the bedrock laws of the land, or transcend ...
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Chris DeVille @chrisdeville.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Iconic
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Michael Gorwitz @gorwitz.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Majora’s Mask szn
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Ryan Rosenblatt @ryanrosenblatt.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Germany beaten by a strict adherence to the rules
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Cristian Farias @cristianfarias.com · 29/06/2026
The Supreme Court Gives Donald Trump Full Control Over the Executive Branch, Except the Part of It that Impacts Their Retirement Portfolios
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Michael Caley @michaelcaley.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
the USMNT second team playing Turkiye more or less even is pretty impressive
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Mike Goodman @themlg.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
You’re telling me a careless under-thought act of aggression against Iran has backfired, handing them a structural advantage from a situation that had been an uneven but balanced state of affairs?
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victoria zeller🫛 (RISEBALL, summer ‘27) @dirtbagqueer.rocks · 20/06/2026
i will not let some hitler youth dickhead running a govt twitter account ruin my enjoyment of our extremely multinational, diverse, and beautiful soccer team. thank you for your understanding at this time 👍
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Jan Ochoa @janochoa.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
Please. One more time.
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Ryan Nanni @celebrityhottub.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
those fuckin scamps
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Molly Knight @mollyknight.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
It took Mamdani five months to get rid of the NYC deficit and oversee a Knicks title. 🫡
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Michael Caley @michaelcaley.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
Brazil midfield for the first 20 minutes
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Daria and Friends Playing Volleyball
ALT: Daria and Friends Playing Volleyball
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Clint Smith @clintsmithiii.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
I wish Grant Wahl was still here for this
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 11/06/2026
SPEECHLESS. LFGK
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Brian Floyd @brianmfloyd.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
mamdani put that game on bus stop tvs and wu tang clan did halftime and it was like saging the entire city of new york
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Matt James @matt-james.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
WU TANG CLAN AINT NOTHIN TO FUCK WITH
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Jason Kirk @jasonkirk.fyi · 11/06/2026
In hindsight it just took the Knicks three quarters to get all the Trump stink out of the building
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TrumpsTaxes @trumpstaxes.com · 09/06/2026
LOL if you thought the Trump boos were loud on TV, wait until you hear them from inside MSG. Video courtesy of Evan Roberts from WFAN on X.
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Denali @denali.bsky.social · 08/06/2026
I really enjoy EB White's take on New York and New Yorkers.
An excerpt from EB White's Here is New York
There are roughly three New Yorks there is first the New York of the man or woman who was born here who takes the city for granted and accepts its size and its turbulence is natural and inevitable second there is the New York of the commuter the city that is devoured by locusts each day and spat out each night third there is the New York of the person who was born somewhere else and came to New York in quest of something of these three trembling cities the greatest is the last the city of final destination the city that is a goal it is this third city that accounts for New York's high-strung disposition it's poetical deportment it's a dedication to the arts and it's incomparable achievements commuters give the city its title restlessness natives give it solidity and continuity but the settlers give it passion and whether it is a farmer arriving from Italy to set up a small grocery store in a slum or a young girl arriving from a small town in Mississippi to escape the indignity of being observed by her neighbors or a boy arriving from the corn belt with a manuscript in his suitcase and a pain in his heart it makes no difference each embraces New York with the intense excitement of first love each absorbs New York with fresh eyes of an adventurer each generates heat and light to dwarf the consolidated Edison company
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Dan Devine @yourmandevine.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
Mike Brown's press conference ended, and it turned into an impromptu media availability for Fat Joe and Jadakiss.
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 05/06/2026
i literally just wanted to own a two bedroom home in a walkable neighborhood where i can have three cats and a dog and wear nice outfits to go feed pigeons and now society is about to collapse
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