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Gokupants

@gokupants.bsky.social
338 followers 137 following 4.9K posts

Seriousposting is for weirdos

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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
POV: PIV
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
me trying to explain to my grandmother why they are called skeets: "so there is this guy named lil jon...no grandma, not robin hood's friend"
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
my personal 9/11 is that now all but one of our vendors requires us to create tickets through a chatbot interface instead of just filling out a damn form i already checked the knowledge base the bot has access to and the answer was not there, thats why im making a ticket in the fiest place! FUCK
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Reposted by Gokupants
Faine Greenwood @faineg.com · 28/09/2026
MC
@burntbulb.bsky.social

okay you can't keep taking every one of my posts and photoshopping it
onto sephiroth
2:52 PM - Sep 28, 2026

+ Follow back
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
my boss has invited me to a chatgpt workspace uuuugggggghhhhhh
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
alex jones does not understand what parody is, which is ironic given he is a parody of a functional human being
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
CEO retired today. His final act was to pocket message the all company teams chat with the letter G.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
guys i think we need more microwaves in the break room what if a dozen people want to use them at the same time
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
there's a handful of crows in the company parking lot that love hanging out on one particular pickup today, they declared war
a crow has shidded on the driver's door handle
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
check out this lady i saw at the beach with her dog wearing a white and gold dress
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
has @badposter.lol posted hole yet?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Hold up. The Dalai Lama's name is Tenzin Gyatso? The airbending masters Tenzin and Gyatso were named after the Dalai Lama? Huh...
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Breaking: FBI director Kash Patel has been identified as the Something Awful user who said he fucked his dog for a dare.
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Mrs. Detective PikaBOO, Esq. @clapifyoulikeme.favrd.social · 15/09/2026
This is one of the funniest threads I’ve read in ages. At no point does OP break, and the landlords, well, www.reddit.com/r/Landlord/c...
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Reposted by Gokupants
Steve Flack @vitaminsteve.com · 11/09/2026
that’s it, we’ve peaked. Call it a day, go start your weekends.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
George Bush painting a picture of the WTC on the 25th anniversary, tears in his eyes: "It took so long to distract people from how evil I am. Thank you, Donald and Michelle, for helping me with this seemingly impossible task. Mission accomplished." He adds a small silhouette of a 767 in the back.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
As of this afternoon, it is now possible to have been born after 9/11 and be halfway through your 20s.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Charlie Kirk had holes
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Never forget: Charlie Kirk didn't kill himself
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Shot through the neck and you're to blame Tyler, you give shooters a bad name ... Woah, you're a loaded gun, yeah Oh, there's nowhere to run No one can save me, the damage is done
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Living in a world of make believe I can hide behind what's real But wearing your bigotry on your sleeve And they all know what you feel And here it comes again Straight through the neck
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Happy anniversary to the day when the annoying whining sound in my right ear finally stopped. There was a loud bang and then finally some silence.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Haven't heard from Charlie Kirk in a while. Tomorrow is 9/11, and it's kinda weird he hasn't been out there saying hateful things about Muslims. Did something happen?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
It's been a year. Are we still all Charlie Kirk? Can I be James T Kirk now?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
Dude, you look like you got a sunburn from watching TV.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
We know Mitch McConnell is truly dead because it has been longer than 1d10 days. If his phylactery was still intact, he would have regenerated by now.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
A bicycle with six wheels is called a hexcycle, or heke for short.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
PSI just means Per Square Inch. You can use it to measure a lot of things. Freckles. The perfect amount of jelly to put on a sandwich.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
So are Swifties going to be called Kelces now?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Testicles are 93°F, so I can say that this weekend is going to be hotter than balls.
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Liam Hogan @liamhogan.id.au · 02/07/2026
Ad Rock: you can disagree with the current All: POPE MCA: but if you push his buttons then you’re a All: DOPE Mike D: ordain yourself a bishop and you’re All: SCHISMATIC Ad Rock: excommunication is All: AUTOMATIC
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Hell yeah
The time is 4:44:44
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
What do you think Joe Rogan's podcasting studio smells like? Weed mixed with BO? Maybe some fabreeze hastily sprayed right before the guest arrives and it wears off a third of the way through recording.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Retire In Piss, Alito
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Honey nut cheerios are disgusting. You're telling me a bee nutted in my cheerios? 🤮
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
In my phone image gallery, the cover photo for my favorites folder is goatse. It makes showing coworkers pictures of my cats more exciting and dangerous.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
Conservatives are stinky and gross. Whenever anyone suggests they take a shower, conservatives say "no we can't make changes to the dirt and grime, that's been there since time immemorial. It's traditional dirt."
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Do people at Billy Batson's school ever wonder why lightning keeps striking near the school on a clear day all the time, and then suddenly Billy shows up late to class? Is he building some sort of lightning gun out behind the bleachers?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
Pokemon come from eggs. Does that mean all pokemon have cloacas? Is Infernape a monkey with a cloaca?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
Could Light not simply have written his own name in the death note and specified that he would die peacefully in his sleep at the age of 110?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
Breaking: RFK Jr diverts all available HHS resources to track down the theives that stole his raccoon penis bone collection. "I have a bone to pick with them" -RFK Jr
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
It's 84 and sunny and one of the customer service reps has a space heater on under their desk. What the actual fuck?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
All that money and Elon Musk still can't afford a decent razor.
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Meegan🌙 [Beegan🐝] @jovialstarfish.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
girl on white couch meme, but piper perri has been replaced with chester cheeto who is squated up and pooping cheetos. this white couch is about to be so dirty.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Walking up to the grill display at the hardware store and asking where I can find the bear grills.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
The one on his roof?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Rabid Fuckwit Kook Jr.
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Do you think Superman feels a little pang of guilt whenever he checks the "prove you are human" captcha box?
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Gokupants @gokupants.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
I will (never) log off
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