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Giraud, basically

@giraud.bsky.social
6.3K followers 682 following 13K posts

Please be funny or a cat.

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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I love interviews with Millie Bobby Brown because they’re always like “My husband, Jacob Tortelloni, has taken an interest in paleontology recently. I know this because he refuses to eat his chicken milanese unless I cut it into dinosaur shapes for him first.”
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Sure I play it cool, but all this time I’ve been smuggling a skeleton around
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
I don’t know why you’re being so ominous about it, but thank you, I would love to receive just desserts
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haunted girlfriend @sliceofwife.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
I'm in the bath being mysterious
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Remember that other week we liked macklemore?
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Anime woman in backpacking clothes stands in front of a wooded area and says “I’m so pumped for Autumn I’m gonna fill my ass with leaves”
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Tommy Wiseau is going to do the halftime show at Hi-Mark stadium
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
sure it’s fun being diculous one time, but multiple times? there’s a word for that
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
okay so apparently cops hate it when you wave ‘em around like you just don’t care. They only like the first part
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Make a band edible: The Pixie Stix
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I bet Abraham Lincoln loved getting faxes from samurai
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
My core 9/11 memory is calling my mom from downtown new york crying and her telling me to stop being so dramatic
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Dr Pepper Zero Sugar is a lovely name for a girl
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Love how Paul’s response is basically “you shouldn’t have gotten that iPod if you didn’t want to delete ‘The Miracle of Joey Ramone’ every time you plug it into your desktop”
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Get in, Loser. We’re going down to the internet cafe so you better fucking wear your ski goggles
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
idk what the problem is, i would love a pile of dogs
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
If you want better phonetics, follow the OED instead
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
I’m so tired of the NFL using bell cow running backs. That job should be for people only
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Even smiling makes my face ache 🥀
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Adding soap shavings to my tacos because I’m out of cilantro
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
She was the best one
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Me trying to teach Max Collins how to make a margarita: Max: I will swallow the limes, I will choke on the rinds Me: no, no, just cut them in half for now Max: wanna put my tender heart in a blender Me: OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING STOP THAT
no.no
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𝔏𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔏𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢 @fleurkenstein.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
ICYMI: Episode one of Who Prose There? The really good book review. Where we discuss how to fit a velociraptor in a car, cloaca logistics, and Antonio Banderas. m.youtube.com/watch?v=SiNF...
m.youtube.com
Who Prose There - Don Juan Velociraptor
YouTube video by Durs Productions
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Henry David Thoreau: *invents No. 1 pencil* Dixon Ticonderoga: lmao check this shit out
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
haters on medieval twitter seeing a short plague victim: lmao get rekt buboes baggins
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𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 @borgerville.com · 23/08/2026
nice age of bronze, let me guess, it’s collapsing? of course
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
why didn’t anyone tell me about binturongs back when we were picking favorite animals? seriously wf
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Fart City, Utah—is anyone saying this?
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Mika Fae Queen of Night 🏳️‍⚧️ @msmaxwellmusic.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
this has real "final video log on derelict space freighter" vibes
Kamala Harris Zoom call with the words Be "Ruthless"
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
everything christopher walken says sounds like it was clipped together from other christopher walken conversations
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
let’s just jump straight to Woke 5 already i wanna make gender reveal parties illegal unless they’re a trans debutante ball
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Pru @prufrockluvsong.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
Eating a cinnamon roll by snapping it open like a slap bracelet
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
my mom said I’m not allowed to watch goshzilla at your house any more
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
I know, I’ve been to New Jersey
Vice article headline reads Neanderthal Men Were Banging Human Women for Hundreds of Thousands of Years with a picture of a neanderthal in animal skins while two humans copulate in the background
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
A jumanji-themed italian restaurant called “Jumangia”, is this worth anything?
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Shout out to that one kid who yelled “present!” at roll call, mfer carried us through homeroom
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Me, on a blind date with a pirate: Oh, you have a peg leg? That’s so interesting! Is it short for pegnelope?
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glue @delightedbutdying.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
castlevania? should be called castlefangia with all those vampires popping up
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
One Piece is basically the Odyssey but where everyone they meet is really fucking annoying
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
Man, what are we doing here?
Chalkboard street sign promoting ice cream flavors of corn, sesame, taro, matcha rose, thai tea, and lavender
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
The thing about he-man is that he already had a nice castle, with no moss or ghosts on it, but then he’s like “no, I’m going to this other spooky ass castle with a bird lady and I’m gonna wear a harness”
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
Matthew McCottagecheese is anyone saying this?
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
2.5 hours into this christopher nolan movie and haven’t seen one fucking minivan yet
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Pontiac Trans-Am is short for Pontiac Transgender-American. Not many people know that.
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stovey @doorhook.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
*turning to the camera as I shake out loose cereal from my shirt* “I guess you could say I…still have a few trix up my sleeve”
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Helen Keller truthers explaining how Homer could have written the Odyssey
Charlie Day conspiracy meme of him standing in front of a cluttered bulletin board with lots of red lines connecting papers
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
knights in white satin? bro you’re gonna need better protection than that
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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Fucked that there are a million songs about love but only one about baking me a cake as fast as you can
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Giraud, basically @giraud.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Posting a picture with today’s paper for proof of life is giving hostage
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