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The Flat Universe Society

@flatuniverse.bsky.social
262 followers 559 following 175 posts

Like the Flat Earth Society, but way bigger. And way less wrong. Ω = 1 Join the FU Society today!

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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 15/10/2025
@neildegrassetyson.com I have a sincere question: The earth is tilted at 23.5° relative to the plane of our solar system. Our solar system is tilted 60° relative to the plane of our galaxy. What is the tilt of our galaxy relative to the plane of the flat Universe? Thank you!
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 03/02/2025
They say graphene (a single atom thick) is the flattest thing in existence, but if you made an earth sized sheet of it, gravity would cause it to just crinkle up and wrap around Earth’s spherical surface. Even a small sheet of it bends, infinitesimally, in response to earth’s gravity. Flat my ass.
phys.org
The flattest material in the world
The Nobel Prize for physics goes to Andre Geim and Konstantin Novoselov, both Russian-born physicists now working at the University of Manchester in the U.K., for their discovery of graphene.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 21/01/2025
The Milky Way is so alone tonight in this motel vending machine in Alabama. I will consume you, lonely sentinel.
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DocAtCDI @docatcdi.com · 25/12/2024
If the earth was flat and fish swam over the edge, where would they go? Trouter space.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 22/12/2024
The U.S. Congress has asked the flatness experts at our society to review a proposal for a federal flat tax rate. Here is our report, in full: Flat spacetime bends around massive celestial objects. Accordingly, a flat tax should bend to a higher rate around massively wealthy people.
An image depicting how the sun causes a greater bend in spactime than the much-less-massive earth:
The image is covered by a two dimensional, horizontal grid. In the center of the grid is our Sun. However, because the Sun is so massive, it causes a bend in spacetime, and so we see the grid lines sag downward underneath the Sun. 

We also see the Earth. It is much smaller and so only causes a small curve in the grid lines around it.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 21/12/2024
It’s hard for an astronomy themed vulgarian like me to find his community, so you can imagine my joy when I found a subculture of French folks devoted to the “vulgarisation d' astronomie”…and my heartbreak when Google Translate told me it just means “popularization of astronomy”.
A screen shot of someone’s Bluesky account who’s profile blurb says “Vulgarisation d’ Astronomie” (a phrase that does not translate into “vulgarization of astronomy”)
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 20/12/2024
It finally dawned on me to google “Flat Universe Society” just in case it might actually exist. Turns out there’s a dodgy FlatUniverseSoc account on Xitter. This tiny fly-by-night operation burped out 8 tweets in 2017 and disappeared. Our society will be forcibly enrolling their abandoned followers.
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Dracula @justkiddingsimmons.bsky.social · 20/12/2024
Happy flat fuck Friday y'all
youtu.be
ITS FLAT FUCK FRIDAY YOU FUCKING LOSERS
YouTube video by pigdeons
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
Flat Earthers, dust off your tinfoil hat and report for duty: The Flat Universe Society hereby enrolls/conscripts all of you into our organization! * Welcome, misguided but brave pioneers. Gooble gobble. One of us! This is an unavoidable merger, not a hostile takeover. *Annual membership fees apply.
A yellow traffic sign that says “MERGE”
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
BREAKING!: "the geometry of the universe is flat, like a sheet of paper.." - NASA
wmap.gsfc.nasa.gov
WMAP- Shape of the Universe
Public access site for The Wilkinson Microwave Anisotropy Probe and associated information about cosmology.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
Can you place a phone call by repeatedly hanging up a landline phone? Yes! Get a dial tone, then rapidly press the plunger buttons, say, three times. Congrats! You’ve just successfully imitated a rotary phone dialing a “3” To place a call, just tap out all the digits, leaving a pause between them.
Top view of a rotary-dial phone. The plunger buttons in the phone’s handset-cradle are clearly visible.
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Dgar @dgar.bsky.social · 14/12/2024
Why do meteors always land in craters?
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Nyebodnye @nyebodnye.bsky.social · 13/12/2024
@flatuniverse.bsky.social Baseballs are flat. I checked.
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Nyebodnye @nyebodnye.bsky.social · 13/12/2024
So you're proposing that the sun shining out of Uranus' arse coincides with being RickRolled
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
Uranus spins on its side. This means that one of Uranus' poles is often pointed towards the Sun. Let’s just say the truth out loud: Unlike every other decent planet, Uranus is literally bent over, pointing its butt at the sun. A line drawn from its south pole stabs our sun once every 84 years. (1/3)
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Rika Smith @iamrikasmith.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
Eek
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Katy's Shit Cartoons @cartoons.katymontgomerie.com · 28/11/2024
Atoms are binary. They are either intended to be hydrogen or helium. We can't just scrap this worldview just because of a handful of exceptions
Pie chart:
74% hydrogen
25% helium
1% other (in tiny font)
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Reposted by The Flat Universe Society
Adam P Knave @adampknave.com · 08/12/2024
I believe the Earth is actually a custard filled globe, hardened by fire and caramel along the upper crust. Yes, I have founded the Flan Earth Society. I even wrote some stories about it. It's decent flan fiction.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
Propelled by thrusters of atmosphlatulence.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
This is a boilerplate meme form: Rapper Drake is seen cringing in the upper image, and agreeably smiling in the lower image. Next to the upper image is the text “The earth is flat!”. Next to the lower image it says “The universe is flat!”
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
Steven Hawking noted that of the infinite number of universes only those with exactly the correct density for forming galaxies would give rise to sentient observers such as humans: therefore the fact that we observe Ω to be so close to 1 (ie, flat) would be "simply a reflection of our own existence”
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handle.invalid @handle.invalid · 06/12/2024
WHY is XOR a "+"? I am outraged
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
#BookSky #BookChallenge
paperback book cover of Ralph Milne Farley's "The Radio Planet". There is a humanoid alien in the foreground holding a bow and arrow. He's pointong of toward the distance where we see a bizarre landscape of tall mushroom-like trees, and a distant flying-dinosaur-type creature.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
You do some shoplifting, you go to jail for a million seconds (12 days). You commit a brutal murder, you go to prison for a billion seconds (31.7 years). What crime do I have to commit to get sent to prison for a trillion seconds (31,710 years)?
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
Wikipedia, mansplaining the Shape of the Universe. “Many textbooks erroneously state that a flat or hyperbolic universe implies an infinite universe; however, the correct statement is that a flat universe that is also simply connected implies an infinite universe” Quibble-quibble. Sh*t’s flat, yo.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
It was so cool when Einstein wowed everybody with his e=mc2 thing, and then we all suddenly understood spacetime, despite it making no fookin’ gut-sense to any of us (still).
Image taken from Wikipedia’s entry on “Spacetime” it shows a flate square plane and from the center a cone extends upward (the future light cone) and also there’s a cone just opposite from the center point going downward (the past light cone).
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
Dang, someday soon the only job left for a pancake like me is gonna be changing the belts on automatic pancake machines.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
A bluesky account based on quasi-educational flat universe jokes will inevitably run out of steam. Unless its comedic density just so happens to match critical density of the Universe at 10^{-29} g/cm3, which it does, making this shizzit muzzafukkin flat and muzzafukkin immortal.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
“The observable universe (of a given current observer) is a roughly spherical region extending about 46 billion light-years in all directions” But a few paragraphs later: “the observable universe is spatially flat with an unknown global structure” Pick a side! en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shape_o...
en.m.wikipedia.org
Shape of the universe - Wikipedia
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
What does the flat universe sound like on a cold December night? Maybe like this: youtu.be/e- _soDLfECU?si=QErgvUVigNNeh_Bg
youtu.be
Looped
YouTube video by Bowery Electric - Topic
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
A tiny bit more density, and the Universe would have a positive curve, like a sphere, and we’d die in a Big Crunch. Slightly less density and it’s a negative curve, a saddle, we’d die in a Big Freeze. It is only when conditions are just perfect that we get flatness, and a universe that never dies.
Image taken from the wikipedia entry for “Flatness problem”. Three objects are in the image. A black sphere is above a black saddle shaped object which is above a flat black rectangle.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
Flatness is no laughing matter: “Whether the universe is “flat″ could determine its ultimate fate; whether it will expand forever, or ultimately collapse back into itself” en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flatnes...
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
“Current observational evidence imply that the observable universe is spatially flat to within a 0.4% margin of error of the curvature density parameter with an unknown global topology.” en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shape_o...
en.m.wikipedia.org
Shape of the universe - Wikipedia
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
Dear everyone else, “Math” is an uncountable noun. Sincerely, North America
Bart Simpson writing “math + math ≠ maths” on a chalkboard
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
Some random pancake on the internet talking about a flat-as-a-pancake Universe is obviously a parody account, right? Well, let’s make a bet: if you google “shape of the Universe” and find I’m right, you’ll follow and repost me. If you find I’m wrong, I’ll eat my underwear on a live video broadcast
Panty underwear that has images of pancakes on it.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 26/11/2024
The Universe is flat AF, but how thick is it? Is it more like an exquisite New York style thin crust, or more like the grotesque abomination they call pizza in Chicago?
An AI generated image of a pizza pie. The image has a vertical dividing libe in the center, and on the left we see a thin NY style crust, and on the right, a thick Chicago style crust.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
Science quiz question! The earth is tilted at 23.5° relative to the plane of our solar system. Our solar system is tilted 60° relative to the plane of our galaxy. What is the tilt of our galaxy relative to the plane of the flat Universe? Post your answer in the comments!
Digital display of the word “Tilt”, as seen on pinball machines when the player tries to cheat by tilting the machine.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
The FU Society has zero followers so far. Too bad this platform won’t step up and employ some algorithms to ram our posts down everyone’s feed hole.
An animated gif of an woman sitting in a chair with a goose at her feet. She’s repeatedly plunging down the handle a force-feeding apparatus which is attached to the goose’s mouth.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
Great minds concur that the Universe is flatter than a 7” vinyl single. However, these same great minds still have no idea which is the A-side and which is the B-Side.
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
Scientists dont know how many dogs have fallen over the edge of the universe. But thanks to The FU Society’s work and the sweet harmonies of the BeeGees that number has dropped significantly. “Just my dog and I At the edge of the universe Well, I didn't wanna bring her..” youtu.be/vKHnZWyDCUk?...
youtu.be
Edge Of The Universe
YouTube video by Bee Gees - Topic
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The Flat Universe Society @flatuniverse.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
Perfect flatness is mathematically represented as 1 Average pancake flatness: 0.957 Flatness of the Universe is 1 with a .4 margin of error, so even if our calculations were as wrong as possible the Universe’s flatness would be 0.996 That’s way flatter than a pancake, y’all.
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