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Thumper Forge

@fivefoldlaw.bsky.social
1.7K followers 422 following 865 posts

Witch. Warlock. Minos/Melos. Spicy Shopkeep. Notary Public. fivefoldlaw.mayhem.my

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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Whenever I come to the conclusion that none of this is true or believable, something as simple as an Equinox snaps me back to where I belong.
patheos.com
Give It To The Squid: The Realness Of Witchcraft
Whenever I come to the conclusion that none of this is true or believable, something simple inevitably snaps me back to where I belong.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Editor: "So... the Joker is still a mass murderer, but his backstory now includes AuDHD, an ambiguous sexual orientation, and abusive parents, thus making his multitude of heinous crimes both understandable and forgivable?" Ryan Murphy, writing for DC Comics: "Plus he looks like Charlie Hunnam."
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
What scene makes you emotional no matter how many times you've seen it?
static.klipy.com
Nicole Kidman as a Witch in Practical Magic
ALT: Nicole Kidman as a Witch in Practical Magic
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Someone got in my comments all, "Wicca is less than 60 years old," so I was like, "That would mean Gerald Gardner came up with it after he died." Which is "semantics" and "manipulation tactics," apparently. Eh. I can live with that.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
"I find the Law of Fives to be more and more manifest the harder I look." -Lord Omar Khayyam Ravenhurst #HailEris #DiscordianWitchcraft
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Principia Discordia @principiadiscordia.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Spaceballs? ‘Oh, shit. There goes the planet.’
Alt-text: Meme image styled as a social-media post above a purported “UNITED STATES SPACE FORCE — SERVICE DRESS UNIFORM — NEXT GENERATION” design sheet. A male model wears a severe dark-gray military uniform with high collar, broad belt, tall black boots, and triangular Space Force insignia; surrounding panels show the uniform from behind and close-ups of its cap, collar, shoulder, sleeve patch, rank insignia, and belt buckle. Someone has crudely Photoshopped an enormous glossy white, rounded helmet onto the main model’s head, making him resemble the absurdly oversized-helmeted villains of Spaceballs. Caption: “Spaceballs? ‘Oh, shit. There goes the planet.’”

Generated with Bluesky AltText, a CustomGPT.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Early birthday presents from the GREATEST BOYFRIEND IN THE HISTORY OF ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER'S INTERNET. (Please also note the Jellicle Mug in the background.) #NowAndForever #CatsTheJellicleBall
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Customer: "Hi. I kind of know what I'm looking for, but I'm not quite sure. Could you help?" Me: "Of course!" [I help him find what he's looking for.] Customer: "Thank you so much. I'm probably your worst nightmare of a customer, huh?" Me: Customer: Me: "Nowhere. Near."
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
"A secret method of identifying your Discordianship for the benefit of other Discordians is by wearing a pull-off aluminum beer-can tab ... That is called an All-Seeing Eye of Eris (complete with Tear) and it will help other members of the Discordian Society keep out of your way." -Lord Omar
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Solitary Witch Books @witchbooks.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
With no context or explanation. Just 20 (in my nightstand) esoteric books we have been reading and re-reading every night during this summer for pure enjoyment. #witchybooks #booksforwitches @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social @llewellynbooks.bsky.social
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Listen. I am from Texas, so I know I don't really have a leg to stand on here, but literally everyone at the Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood airport deserves their own HBO docuseries.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
In case anyone's looking for me... #HarvestGathering #DiscordianWitchcraft
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
The malocchio is no match for relentless whimsy. #RaeDunn #DiscordianWitchcraft
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Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
me: *sneaks into the cinema dressed as a man made of wicker to see The Odyssey*
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Paul F. Tompkins @pftompkins.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Odysseus mentioning that he’s in the Bronze Age made me think of a caveman saying “Man it is extremely Paleolithic around here lately”
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
Customer: "Could I get a bottle of [product name]?" Me: "Sure. I've got them in the back, so I'll go grab one for you." Customer: "I don't see them." Me: "Yes.... because they're in the back." Customer: "Oh." 1/2
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Nick 🐙 @nickoctopus.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
on a similar tip, a welcoming and inclusive pub here in Edinburgh once found that someone had graffitied "GAYZ ONLEY" across their exterior, presumably upset about this aspect of their business. So the pub of course had a sign made, and rebrand themselves as that every June for pride month
a screenshot from google streetview, showing a pub with a sign reading "GAYZ ONLEY".  There is a progress pride flag in one window, and a trans flag in the other
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Emerson UU Church @emersonuuchurch.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
I'm currently working a psychic fair and reflecting on how similar it is to managing the spicy shop: In both situations, when a customer tells me what they're into, the one thing I can never say in response is, "Ew."
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
The magic rocks have my emotional support abomination (Red Brass Deon-Lakin of Jumpshire) feeling cautious but curious. #Lithomancy #WitchSky #DiscordianWitchcraft
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
Boyfriend is watching the original Wicker Man for the first time. I feel like he's either going to break up with me or demand to attend a Summer Solstice ritual. #WitchSky
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Emerson UU Church @emersonuuchurch.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
The 1969 Stonewall riots marked a new beginning for the gay rights movement in the United States, but it wasn't until the 1991 murder of Paul Broussard that the Houston community said "ENOUGH." Join our live-streamed service at 11 a.m. CST (or watch later on our YouTube channel):
youtube.com
Sunday, June 14th, 2026: Remembering Paul Broussard - Reverend Ed Proulx
YouTube video by Emerson UU Church
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
Me: [dancing about] "PRACTICAL CATS, DRAMATICAL CATS, PRAGMATICAL CATS, FANATICAL CATS..." Boyfriend: Me: "... ORATORICAL CATS, DELPHIC ORACLE CATS, SKEPTICAL CATS..." Boyfriend: Me: Boyfriend: Me: "... DISPEPTICAL CATS."
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
After spending well over 20 minutes in our restroom, a customer walked up to the counter and said, "I hope I didn't leave it too messy in there." Yeah, sight unseen, I'm just going to lock the door and put up an Out of Order sign. #RetailSky
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Jared Pechaček @vandroidhelsing.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
does the eagle know its role in Prometheus's punishment or is it just showing up every day like "holy shit, free liver AGAIN??"
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
Customer: "Hey, could you notarize something for me?" Me: "Sure!" Customer: "Great! Basically, I need you to watch me sign a document, just to prove it's me." Me: "Yes. That's... what a notary does." 10/10 on the mansplaining tho.
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@Christopher Penczak @christopherpenczak.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
Great step-by-step instructions here and best to leave a unique comment for greater impact if you can.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 08/06/2026
To the parents of the little girl at the next table who casually turned around and started eating our fries while politely staring us down: Your kid has a very bright future in sales, and we love her unconditionally.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
Blew a tire on the way home. Tow truck driver is making small talk about hunting iguanas. Boyfriend has code-switched to North Texan. I am nodding a lot and occasionally grunting affirmatively.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
I have never in my life been more afraid of vampire attacks than I am right now in this restroom.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
Boyfriend ran out of standard-issue traffic invectives and just screamed "DOJA CAT" at a Honda Civic. It's *kind of* the best road rage ever.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
OMG I AM ON A BILLBOARD SORT OF.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
A couple of years ago, @sarahlcrowder.bsky.social gave me the tea towel on the right. Today, I added the tea towel on the left to create a cautionary fable.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
Boyfriend is currently judging me for something I apparently did in a dream, so that's a fun relationship achievement unlocked. 💝
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yaoi gagarin @mel.bzky.team · 26/05/2026
the real clown shit is when you do mundane stuff like cooking together or watching a stupid show together and youre suddenly overcome by a love 200x more profound than any other feeling youve ever known. and then you have to sit with the fact its been brought about by the act of watching Riverdale
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Trae Dorn - Writer/Witch/Weirdo. @traegorn.bsky.social · 26/05/2026
This month's episode of BS-Free Witchcraft is a review of @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social's The Chaos Apple. And I have one major issue... #witchsky #witch #chaosmagic #discordianism #witchcraft
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 26/05/2026
Boss: "Okay, explain again why you were late?" Me: "I was stuck behind white people shit." Boss: Me:
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
I mean, not yet. But the night is young!
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🍂🪦ℭ𝔥𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔫𝔦𝔵, ℭ𝔬𝔩𝔡 𝔅𝔯𝔢𝔴 & ℭ𝔬𝔣𝔣𝔦𝔫𝔰🪦🍂 @chthonix.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
No notes. A necessary read for all under the pagan tent. Thank you for this, Thumper.
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Juliet Pebble @pebbleastro.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
Thumper Forge talks about how easy it is to be silent if you’re not affected by discrimination. I’m an old cis white lady, but I have been blessed with a trans daughter. If it wouldn’t be safe to bring her to the function, I ain’t coming. It keeps things very simple for me!
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
We don't want anyone to feel unwelcome... oh, wait, their bigotry makes you feel unwelcome? Well, that's your problem. Suck it up, infidel.
patheos.com
And Now, A Word On Transphobia
We don't want anyone to feel unwelcome... oh, wait, their bigotry makes you feel unwelcome? Well, that's your problem. Suck it up, infidel.
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Tamsin the Sword ⚔️ Monster 🧌 @tamsin.reimaginedgirl.com · 09/05/2026
If you've wondered what I've been morosely vagueposting about over the past few days, you need wonder no more. You may feel free to share this blog post to whatever extent you wish.
reimaginedgirl.com
Closing Time: A Response to the Sacred Space Conference
After my presentation at last February’s Sacred Space Conference, a few people have asked if I’ll be at next year’s event. The short answer is that, no, I will not be attending Sa…
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
Me: "Why would he put all the decorative canisters on the left side of the sink?! THAT'S NOT WHERE THEY GO." Also Me: "Oh. Wait. They look better there." Having both OCD and a boyfriend with working knowledge of interior design is going to be a endeavor.
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Chanda Prescod-Weinstein 🌌 @chanda.blacksky.app · 19/05/2026
Nobody is born Islamophobic. Islamophobic children are made and will continue to be made in a society that treats Islamophobia as a bipartisan norm and even sometimes social good. Islamaphobic children with access to guns are made possible by an Islamophobic society that loves guns.
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
Apotropaic, but make it dismissive. Like in a gay way. #DiscordianWitchcraft
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
“This is St. Gulik. He is the Messenger of the Goddess. A different age from ours called him Hermes. Many people called him by many names. He is a Roach.” -Principia Discordia, page 00027 #BoloTie #DiscordianWitchcraft
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Emerson UU Church @emersonuuchurch.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
"I have a lot of respect for the ancient Greeks. They did a lot of good stuff. They weren't perfect, but they did some good stuff." -Rev. Ed Proulx
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
My favorite take from the current subcultural controversy all over my feed: "If you know what happened but didn't share the details with me, you're a bad person. However, now that I know what happened, I'm not sharing the details out of respect for those involved. I'm kind of a saint that way."
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MxCassandraSnow @mxcassandrasnow.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
We were honored to sit down and basically hang out with @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social to talk all things Chaos, Discord & Myth. I had the time of my life and was sad it ended! Outwherever you listen to podcasts, including YouTube & this link where there's also a transcript! patreon.com/chaosandcunning
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Thumper Forge @fivefoldlaw.bsky.social · 12/05/2026
An amended Quote o' the Moment in honor of my new shower curtain: "That [book cover] really tied the room together." #WitchSky #VirgoWitch #SunSignSeries
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