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David Bell

@davidcbell.bsky.social
284 followers 199 following 386 posts

I work in computer program administration with the ProConductor utility.

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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Fairy tale homophones: The Aunt and the grasshopper. I had an aunt who drank a lot of grasshoppers. She was a drunk, but had minty breath. The end
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Grandma Moses didn't pursue her love of painting until age 78. It's never too late! Sir, you are 54. You cannot compete in the little league world series.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
It's very effective. So many of us aren't dating you now (I mean, I assume).
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
static.klipy.com
Rosie the Riveter: WWII Icon
ALT: Rosie the Riveter: WWII Icon
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Explaining blue sky to someone: it's like twitter without the Nazis and everyone picks on one guy named Jerry, even Jerry.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
And, you have multiple serving suggestions for the blood of your enemies. You definitely seem worth not dating.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
I mean, it's an excellent sales pitch not to date you.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
The Autocorrect Genie gave me a magic carport and 1 millions doll hairs
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Reposted by David Bell
Path (seasonal)🎉 @demandavoider.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
y'all ever feel like icarus pushing a big ball of wax up a hill towards the sun?
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
People, she seems nice. You heard her, Don't date her.
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Reposted by David Bell
Xela Hart @xelahart.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
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Reposted by David Bell
amy brown 👻 @amybrown.xyz · 08/10/2026
yeah the party starts at 9 but we're not cutting the big newton until 10:30 so come thru whenever
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Make sure those kids get away from your apple tree.
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Reposted by David Bell
Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
a flash mob where we all start crying at the same time
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Much like many other disorders.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
It's a sad truth the majority of us live with daily.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Not everyone likes pizza, and pizza is amazing.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
I use it as an excuse to buy 8 cakes.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
I really like Abdul El-Sayed. Every time I watch him speak he really puts forth his points and ideas in common sense ways. I hope to the shiny eternal being of your choice that he wins in November.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
They said updates, not improvements.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
My granddaughter just taught me that overalls have a built in macaroni and cheese pocket and I feel like I have wasted a lot of my life not owning overalls.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
The babies got her the job because they were tired of listening to her lie at home.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Still generating engagement!
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
If he got hit by a truck tonight I would know the spells do work, they just take time.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Is deep impact the one where they have to train astronauts to use drilling equipment in a mine?
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
The More you know
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I love so many... But "Jesus was not a good carpenter" is definitely one of my favorites.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
A lot of people said "Blade" many ignored the importance of some motherfuckers trying to ice skating uphill.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I apologize, I'm an atheist and worship is just not my first instinct.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
My wife and Son were both medical assistants during COVID. The day she had to threaten a man with CPS because he wouldn't mask up so he could bring his dick child in was the day she lost her love for the job.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I keep telling you, this is Orange Julius, the sunglasses hut is on the other side of the food court.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Mom Ford and sons Molly Crue Public Emily 30 Seconds to Venus
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Jerry, this message is important to me, and I will read it in the order it was received. You are currently 437th in queue.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
I don't know if that one leads to a haunting, unless you made a deal with him.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Was it sexy Tim Curry devil from Legend, the South Park Devil, or the ever popular Devil appearing as a human?
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Is it just me, or is allowing an increased military presence within your borders to a country who said they were going to take control of yours, a bad idea?
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I hope he wins and doesn't wear a suit to accept it
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
That must be some email address.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
static.klipy.com
Audience Clapping and Applauding
ALT: Audience Clapping and Applauding
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Just don't take it too far... You don't want to fly too close to the sun.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Sooo.. ballpoint then?
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
I think in this case you actually could probably get the neighboring states to pay.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
Strong leadership isn't about knowing all of the answers. Strong leadership is being able to listen to the right experts at the right times. Knowing you aren't the best person for every situation, but knowing who is the best person for each situation. Someday we may have that again.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
It's worth noting, him saying it's dead doesn't mean it is. All agreeing parties have to dismiss it. I haven't seen anyone saying this was more than him signing off that it was dead.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
This is like if my neighbor's house was on fire and I presented him with a bill for the repainting I will have to do because the smoke discolored my paint.
Trump Imposes 50% tariffs on Canadian goods.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
Listen, if we pay 3.85 it's too much. But if he can get us up to 6.00, then 3.85 ain't so bad.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
As fox reports it -Canada attacks US with dangerous Hydrogen compound.
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
Deeee-troit basketball
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 02/05/2026
Wait until the "tone down the rhetoric" Republicans see this. <Intended as sarcasm, please do not respond as if I don't know that they don't care>
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David Bell @davidcbell.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
You got it. Anything for you Jerry.
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