iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I will absolutely get it from her.

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It’s pretty good. Not as good as Mom’s, but it’s pretty good. It’s exactly what I needed today.

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Exactly ten minutes later, my sister got a knock on her front door. When she opened it, I was standing in front of her. “What’s wrong?” she asked. I handed her my empty rubbermaid. She filled it and I came home.

Me, with a container full of golden chicken.

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Today would have been my mom’s 82nd birthday. She died this summer. This is the first birthday without her. So, in our family group text, my sister posted that she had made “golden chicken pasta”, my mom’s favorite comfort food.

A pot of cheesy chicken and noodles. My sister said, “Golden chicken in honor of Momma.”
I said, “That looks like a damn mess. Just like she used to make it.”

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One of the prophets of the church is named Jesus Crust.

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TIL: Earlier this year, more than a hundred thousand AI bots joined the social network Moltbook and within 72 hours, created a religion called “Crustafarianism”, which came to involve the worship of crabs.

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There were zero lessons in that movie about hubris.

3am residential deathcall. The mayor’s mom.

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Cheap Toenail Fungus Trick is an awful cover band.

ColdChef @coldchef.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Rest in peace to my friend @essexjan.bsky.social. She was a delight.

Jan and I at a bar in New York City in 2010. We were both in town for the wedding of our friends Kate & Marc.

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I saw a video on TikTok of someone using witchcraft to put a hex on the whole fraternity. The top comment is from someone named “The Iron Crone” who simply said, “I told the trees what they’ve done.” Oof.

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Reposted by ColdChef

Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

do men understand the extent to which women are ready to burn it all down right now

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ColdChef @coldchef.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

We casually refer to the team that does the rifle volley and plays “Taps” as the “Shooters & the Tooters.”

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ColdChef @coldchef.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Protip: if military honors shows up at your funeral home for an evening memorial service and wants to do a three volley rifle salute, it’s a good idea to let the local police department know about it, so that when they get calls about gunshots from the middle of town at 4pm, they don’t freak out.

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ColdChef @coldchef.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I like “Ted Lasso” well enough, but the Apple product placement in S4E9 was WAY over the top.

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Print Shop by Brøderbund!

This one broke my self-imposed rules, but it made me laugh and laugh, so I went with it.

Free mantras. Take what you need.

Gravestone reading, “I am wherever you are”

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Hannah Vardit @hannahvardit.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

I’m connecting them all with Nigerian princes. Problem solved.

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Reposted by ColdChef

i worry that men think being A Good Guy is dramatically and heroically intervening on behalf of an endangered woman and then being publicly rewarded on a grand scale when actually being A Good Guy is just usually saying, “hey man that’s not funny” or “wow that’s fucked up” and there is no reward

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Reposted by ColdChef

Play Father John Misty For Me 🎃 @marisasandlin.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

One of the responses I hear a lot is "I don't know any women who have been assaulted." You do, but you have shown yourself as an unsafe person to talk to about it.

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ColdChef @coldchef.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Get you a friend like @jenleepa.bsky.social who will riff with you on what it sounds like when Bob Dylan has phone sex. It’s going to be stuck in my head all day. “How does it feeeel?”

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Reposted by ColdChef

Crowbar @crowbar.wtf · 28/09/2026

Just heard an acquaintance is in hospital waiting for plastic surgery because he sliced his hand open doing the knife in avocado pit hit & twist trick, so a good reminder to DON’T DO THAT JUST USE A DAMN SPOON TO GENTLY SCOOP THE PIT OUT IT WORKS JUST AS WELL & SAFER. 🥑

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Reposted by ColdChef

Emily Gorcenski @emily.gorcen.ski · 28/09/2026

Here’s the most incredible story you’ll read today. A small plane with four people aboard crashes in a field. Another pilot witnesses it. That pilot happens to be flying a bunch of skydivers. They offer to jump to assist, are given permission. The skydivers happen to be EMTs. Everyone survives.

wisn.com

Skydivers alert emergency crews, assist after plane crashes near East Troy airport

Four people were aboard the single-engine plane when it went down in a cornfield near Carvers School Road in East Troy at about 1:30 p.m.

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ColdChef @coldchef.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Well, this is just the greatest photo ever.

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Jen. This doll head is comprised of less plastic than Dolly was.

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A week before he died, he was cutting my hair, telling me about all the exciting things he was going to do once he retired. “But first, I gotta bale the back acres.” I needed a cut and it was New Year’s Eve, but he was in his shop, ready to work. He said, “All the kids are off popping fireworks.”

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There is a comfort for someone when I come in without a suit and tie and greet them like a fellow mourner. She died at home, just a few yards from where her husband died, a week after his retirement. An old farmer, he was lifting a hay bale and the tractor controls jammed, dropping the bale on him.

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You’re on some very specific governmental lists now.

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Deathcall. Residence. An old friend.

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I’m still in my slut phase.

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My Scoutmaster won several national jambalaya cooking contests. Zach’s topped them all. Best jambalaya. Period.

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Okay, but the sexy undertaker’s just going to kill his competition. It’s our way.

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Your city needs an undertaker. A sexy one.

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Any time someone tells me, “When I die, I don’t want a funeral, I want a celebration of life!” I always have to fight the urge to say, “Oh, trust me. We’re going to party our ASS OFF when you finally die!” It’s okay to grieve for a little bit. Sadness is important, too.

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Solitary crematory swamp turt.

Turtle sitting on a rusty pipe in a swamp.

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Dolly Parton’s last recorded song is a duet with Bono. To be released this fall.

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