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Jess

@baconjess.bsky.social
2.9K followers 1.2K following 8.7K posts

Minneapolis Can I pet your dog?

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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 22m
Got mine before the term started being used, but I embraced it and I'm gonna embrace "cake topper" even more.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 28m
I mean, you are!
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Chris Ingraham @cingraham.bsky.social · 32m
“Measured levels were approximately 8.3% ethanol, 0.35% methanol, and 0.48% isopropanol" like giving your baby a strong malt liquor
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Dan 🏳️‍🌈 @helloeveryth.ing · 36m
Haven’t we been through enough
Grand Casino Arena
Just Announced: Nickelback
View email in browser. Nickelback Tuesday, March 30 at 6:30 p.m. EVENT INFO
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 52m
OMG JANESVILLE MENTIONED (Is this going to count as Waseca County's weird outstate statuary?)
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Face @thecaseface.bsky.social · 13h
my Somali neighbors are good, actually.
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Plain James @plainnjames.bsky.social · 5h
I hate gay Halloween what do you mean you’re sexy James Talarico of the Houston Wokes
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 15h
I don't want to take the name of the Lord in vain, but GOD DAMN Solomon.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 16h
You too, babe.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 16h
I love it for him and us!
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 16h
Rumplestiltskin watching the Sox and Guardians.
Picture of the Cleveland-Chicago baseball game and a very old man with long hair and a long beard in the background.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 16h
He's cute, though.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 16h
Another dude I do not remember telling me he sees me here all the time and he likes my vibe. I have to start paying better attention.
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Jonah Maves @hunchojman.bsky.social · 21h
2nd place finish for Olivia Miles in MVP in her Rookie season. 6 1st place votes too. 442 total points behind A’ja’s 713.
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John Moe @johnmoe.bsky.social · 21h
As completely deranged and fucked up and wrong as he is, I gotta say it is stressful to have the damn president of the United States constantly attacking my state of Minnesota, sending violence, calling for violence, putting all lives at risk, killing our neighbors. Like it really takes a toll.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 21h
I love the Lynx with all my heart, but they played like absolute garbage in the playoffs. And the last few games of the season. Or several. It happens!
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
new way to describe michael tracey just dropped
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Ben Schleuss @benschleuss.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Oh, we care about refs getting things wrong now???
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Oh my God COME ON DREAM
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Because it's your fault she called the wrong number, obviously.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
This reminds me of when I worked at Bakers Shoes and around the holidays we'd get folks trying to order pies because they thought we were Baker's Square. So many were dicks that our manager told us to start taking pie orders. Enjoy your pieless Thanksgiving, Karen.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
So, Pacers fans can get 20 percent off the season package just in their team store, but the cheap ass Wolves are doing half off one month because I have a ticket package. And season ticket holders get the same deal as any rando Pacers fan?
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
The very rare occasions I have to listen to other teams' broadcasters make me appreciate the Wolves broadcast team* even more. *I haven't heard the new dudes yet. And if I have in other contexts, I do not recall a thing.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Ugh. Gotta listen to the Pacers broadcast? Ew.
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rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
a little louder for the cheap seats in the back
One of the biggest myths is that men rape by mistake. Like, "Oh, they need consent training." But research is very clear: Sexual violence is not a mistake. It is an intentionally made decision by people who know they don't have consent. They just don't prioritize consent over things like status, power, domination, and sexual gratification.
For my research, I got a certificate of confidentiality from the National Institutes of Health, so my notes couldn't be subpoenaed. One of the reasons I call them perpetrators in my work is because every single person I interviewed confessed in that context. The first question I would ask them was, "When you received that email from Title IX that you were under investigation, did you know what it was about?" Every perpetrator I interviewed said "yes." If sexual assault were a miscommunication, you would be wondering, What have I possibly done wrong? That is not the way that any of them reacted because they knew.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Mine is super boring. I'm weirdly disappointed.
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Barbie Devyndarbė @katchin05.blacksky.app · 07/10/2026
It’s funny to me that men are so often ready to fight about parking spaces, hair cuts, video games, etc but can find such deep wells of civility when it comes to squaring up on the rapist behavior in their circles. Why do so many of you have such an otherwise unseen ability to talk it out then?
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ashley fairbanks @ziibiing.com · 06/10/2026
people are so mortified by the idea of a firing squad, but they’re fine with lethal injection, like it isn’t actual torture. god forbid we be confronted with the real, grizzly nature of murdering people at the hands of the state.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
It's only for one month. 🙃
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Rob Delaney @robdelaney.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
This isn’t AI. My cousin Braycen was torn apart by Havana syndrome which is why he’s in his coffin in “chunks”. The ugly “boy” in the (real) photo isn’t his son; it’s a full grown small intruder man who ran off with the head & ate it behind the funeral home. RT to salute 🫡 🇺🇸
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Gotta remember to not include travel time for appointments on my personal calendar. Arrived way too early for my dentist appointment.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
HELLO BONE COLLEAGUES
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I was in tears immediately
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Wow, such generosity.
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Steve McPherson @steventurous.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Big, if true.
Pet hospital sign that reads ‘Jellyfish are just wet ghosts.’
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
So nice of the Wolves to send the half off DAZN subscription email the day after I sign up to watch the first preseason game.
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Elizabeth Wrigley-Field @wrigleyfield.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
My Minnesota friends have already seen this, but I keep thinking about it and want more people outside our state to, too.
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Bougie Man La Flare @ad-renaissance.blacksky.app · 06/10/2026
“Why I oughta” 7s
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Jaden drew blood!
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
And now WTF are these promos? I don't know who any of these dudes are, nor do I care. I think I'd rather have commercials?
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
God these Wolves unis are dope as hell.
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Big Baller Brandon @brandonbeck4.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Remember the preseason doesn't matter, unless the Wolves offense appears to be beautiful and unstoppable which is an obvious sign of a great season incoming
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Haven't seen it in mine yet, but I'm going to be paying closer attention now.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Might actually use my League Pass this year to watch Naz.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I restarted. It's slightly better but I will not be able to handle a full season of this.
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I can barely hear Alan and Jim Pete talking over what sounds like interference on AM radio. It's fine on my phone, so I guess I'm going to try to cast to the TV?
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
WTF is wrong with the sound on DAZN?
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Jess @baconjess.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I'd be happy if the Lynx went more green. But not anything like the horrifying green the Wolves use.
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✨🥀Persephone🥀✨ @bipolarpisces35.blacksky.app · 05/10/2026
Meanwhile, every time the camera panned to a new man
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