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Allyssa Capri ♡

@allyssacapri.bsky.social
90 followers 32 following 250 posts

31 | culture writer | bylines: /Film, Catapult mag, The Take on YT, others | witch wannabe | cinnamon spiced woo woo loudmouth hoochie mama🌙✨️🪷🌿🍄 allyssacapri.substack.com

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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 22/12/2025
Chelsea Fagan by chance.....? (I saw her IG story lol)
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 23/11/2025
The fact that people are more willing to believe this with Michelle Yeoh, who is older and could believably be losing body mass, over The Other Two is laughable. I hate stan culture. Some of us didn't spend the entire 2000s being shown/educated about EDs to be gaslit like this
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 29/06/2025
Just imagined you with a Ricki Lake style talk show where you do this and interview people and you hand them tissues as they sob on an obnoxiously colored couch
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 28/06/2025
Natasha Lyonne Gina Gershon 🤝🏻 Being cishet, playing lesbians
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
Did you really re-appropriate the cover of The New Jim Crow for this thumbnail? Is that what I'm seeing here?
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 01/06/2025
The lack of shitposts and humor is fr the thing that keeps me off this site 😭 a bunch of corny humorless people!
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
I'm so worried for my kid(s), man.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
or b) condense Abby's story to include more familiar characters like Ellie and Dina, and in doing so bastardizing the entire moral point of the game. Ugh. They also made Ellie a lot dumber in the show than the games. Game Ellie was more cunning; show Ellie needs Dina to explain everything to her 🙄
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
Because they chose to do this season as just Ellie's half of the game, now they're setting themselves up to either a) have the fanbase be shocked and pissed when next season is mostly Abby — which is A BIG REASON FANS WERE PISSED WITH THE GAME —
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
Exactly. I was really rooting for this season to be good since I was an outlier in loving the second game, but they took so many missteps with the story. Namely, having the opportunity to tell both Abby and Ellie's stories simultaneously to create more moral tension between the two perspectives.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
They don't know how good it used to be and they're also not having kids yet (or ever) so it's real easy to judge others for consuming the crumbs we're getting now.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
litist Lilo & Stitch/kids movie discourse makes more sense if you realize the negativity is coming from Gen Z pseudo-intellectuals who did not grow up with the absolute renaissance of children's films and TV shows that Millennials did.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
The thing I really don't like about the second season (and probably third) is the show working overtime to make Ellie's actions righteous/her as still Good. A more media literate public would allow for her to be more objectionable but they feel like they have to make everyone black and white
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/05/2025
Especially since the game did no such thing
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 26/05/2025
Okada/Omega fanboys cry!!!! THIS IS THE MAIN EVENT!!!!!
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 26/05/2025
And if I say hers is better.....🙈
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Microplastics Sommelier @leastactionhero.bsky.social · 22/05/2025
my buddy sent me this from nanning, which is presumably one of china’s most supple and moisturized cities
Store sign reading:

哇!这里全是护手霜!
WOW, THERE'S HAND CREAM ALL OVER HERE
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
I know I'm a good writer because I just almost exceeded my word limit writing about a show I've literally never seen lol And it wasn't bullshitting either!
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 13/05/2025
Sometimes I get really, really upset that my dad didn't live long enough to see The Last Dance. A massive MJ fan. Would've been the highlight of his life and payoff of all his Bulls knowledge.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 13/05/2025
Did these people not watch M3GAN?
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Phil Lewis @phillewis.bsky.social · 07/05/2025
Three Memphis police officers have been found not guilty of all state charges in the killing of Tyre Nichols
nbcnews.com
Memphis police officers found not guilty of all state charges in Tyre Nichols beating death
Defendants Tadarrius Bean, Demetrius Haley and Justin Smith were accused of fatally beating the 29-year-old Black man on Jan. 7, 2023.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/04/2025
Bog witch energy
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Fightful Wrestling @fightful.com · 21/04/2025
Stone Cold Steve Austin crashed into the barricade. 😂😂😂 #WrestleMania
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 21/04/2025
Hearing people GUSH about women's wrestling gives me life like few other things can. Goddamn. I love when women lace up the boots and go to work. (Or in other words, fine I will pay for Peacock to watch Rhea/Iyo/Bianca)
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
They deadass just played the show on an LED outside the stadium like that??? Lmao
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Sean Ross Sapp of Fightful @seanrosssapp.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
Living Colour still fucks, Fightful can confirm
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
A promotion that protected the dude that tried to kill her, mind you
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JB 🐻✨🍉🪩 @jbfromdc.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
michelle williams meeting michelle williams is so important to me as a fan of michelle williams and michelle williams
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 10/04/2025
there is no “epidemic,” he is almost certainly going to say it is vaccines and, well, stay safe everyone.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 07/04/2025
Are Monday scaries a thing
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 06/04/2025
What! Will Washington is there too??? Never would have guessed!
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 28/03/2025
RFK D** Challenge
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/03/2025
GOOD
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 27/03/2025
I've taken up a new hobby, as I am contractually obligated to by my brain to maintain optimal stimulation. The hobby is home manicures. Anyways when they chip I feel like a disappointed parent upset with her children (my polish)
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 26/03/2025
They new Blue's Clues guy Josh is cute and I personally find that to be an issue
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 25/03/2025
The company's stance on the CONTENT of the video isn't heelish to them, tho. This is the thing people are willfully missing. No wonder we're here, propaganda works and the reaction to this is proof.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 22/03/2025
My partner and I then proceeded to spend the rest of the flight trying to prevent him from kicking the seat by holding his legs, which only upset him and made him squirm and holler MORE. Her assumption that we were letting our kid be wild is actually what likely led to her having a poorer experience
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 22/03/2025
Tangential to this but I was on a plane with my kid once, he was about to turn 2, and he was kicking the seat in front of him gently. The white lady in the seat looked back at me and said "excuse me, he's kicking my seat. Can you like, watch him?" As if I'm just sitting there. This is before takeoff
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merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 20/03/2025
society erred when we removed the computer from its honored place in the home and ushered it into every part of our profane world. we must rebuild the temple of the Computer Room
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 21/03/2025
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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BJ ColanGIALLO @bjcolangelo.bsky.social · 20/03/2025
Another issue is that the Valnet model has proven so profitable that other digital publishing corporations are replicating it in terms of SEO content mining. And the thing people don’t want to accept — it works. Those piece DO outperform original writing. www.thewrap.com/valent-labor...
thewrap.com
Valnet Blues: How Online Porn Pioneer Hassan Youssef Built a Digital Media 'Sweatshop'
The owner of entertainment websites Screen Rant, Collider, CBR and MovieWeb faces a lawsuit over exploitative work conditions.
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Mark Cuban @mcuban.bsky.social · 19/03/2025
The administration is removing phone support for Soc Security recipients. Making it more difficult for seniors to get their checks. It’s a back door way to cut SS benefits. Horrific. If you know anyone who is impacted, please help them get online to get their benefits approved
benefit.me
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 16/03/2025
I just can't think of a better microcosm for our current system than lower employees starving while the higher ups can eat.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 16/03/2025
(The second star gained WHILE he worked there FYI. He was ONE YEAR out of college when he started working there.)
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 16/03/2025
This is to put money back into the restaurant and ensure that my husband's bosses get THEIR bigger piece of the pie. So my husband basically doesn't eat. Hehad to beg for 81k after 18 months at this place. With 10 years of experience in CHICAGO. With a two Michelin star restaurant on his resume.
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 16/03/2025
My husband's job has a really fucked up pay system where the managers above him have commission pay determined by how much their inferiors make/restaurant success. The FOH manager made a decision that employees have to pay for everything they eat. At the restaurant. They. Work. At.
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Nichole @pezdispensing.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
MORTOS MY BELOVED 🥰 #AEWDynamite 🤼‍♂️
Fellas if ya girl is thicc, has flowing black hair, and is a minotaur... Then that's not your girl that's THE BEAST MORTOS
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 11/03/2025
Happy birthday!
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Kat Tenbarge @kattenbarge.bsky.social · 10/03/2025
Person who told you they would stand with you when it’s time to stand with you: Oh I meant that in the way where it made me feel good about myself to say it and not in the way where I actually had to do it
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Allyssa Capri ♡ @allyssacapri.bsky.social · 10/03/2025
Mariah and Toni put on the kind of match that says "put us in the main event next time, fuckers. Don't ever doubt us."
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