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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade

@45thabsurdist.bsky.social
934 followers 1.3K following 2.7K posts

Procedurally generated communiques of the Luddite Martyrs Battalion of the Butlerian Jihad Now is the time of Monsters. Who put all this order here?

PostsRepliesMedia
45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I HATE YOU ALL, YOU KNOW?
ALL YOU SCUM.
I WANT TO BE
PRESIDENT BECAUSE I HATE YOU.I WANT TO FUCK WITH YOU.
I WANT TO MAKE YOU SHUT UP AND DO THINGS PROPERLY. GET THROUGH YOUR DOOMED LITTLE LIVES QUIETLY.
-the smiler- transmetropolitan
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Some more enlightened societies would describe this as “democracy“
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Ketan Joshi @ketanjoshi.co · 27/09/2026
Remember the random dude who got 49020939 articles of uncritical media coverage in the space of two days because he quit anthropic based on his fears of existential AI risk? Yeah..........he's a climate denier. So is the whole AI industry. www.crikey.com.au/2026/09/22/a...
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Pookleblinky @pookleblinky.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The people making generative AI are in a millenarian cult based on a Harry Potter fanfic and heavily subsidized by Jeff Epstein in its beginning, that is a death cult by day and a rape cult by night. And they make zero effort to hide any of this, they count on you going no fucking way that's weird
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mitch (he/him) @drmitchpdx.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
yeah, i never asked for an endorsement. was not something i was seeking nor was it something i was excited about. it’s true i do have litmus tests. one of those is police accountability with teeth
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Like Netanyahu, I have some critiques of Mamdani. For example, I’m not a fan of how his city’s police force arrested Susan Sarandon and Hannah Einbinder, instead of arresting Benjamin Netanyahu.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
… And yet nobody is threatening to firebomb people referring to it as the “Boston Lesbian Bar Mask Discourse.”
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Harry Potter And The Methods Of Starting A Sex Cult In An Old Hotel In Berkeley California, by Eliezer Yudkowsky
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
bsky.app/profile/segy...
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Calling this “Operation Paperclip”
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Kevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
"Mister Trump, there are still some MAGA voters who are stubbornly standing by you. Can you say something to alienate them too?"
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
I believe I have a sol to the current AI datacenter debate which will satisfy everyone: we currently possess the technology to trap only those who believe in Roko’s basilisk in an inescapable torturous AI slop hell, while the rest of us live out our goddamn lives addressing actual problems.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
hey ladies: time to massage your search terms on the apps. shouldn’t take much to throw this bunch off tho. on account of how they’re dumber than a bag of hammers. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...
theguardian.com
FBI warned ICE agents could be targeted by fake ‘tradwife’ dating profiles, memo reveals
Exclusive: Internal FBI memo, reviewed by the Guardian, said women wanted to dox and ‘embarrass’ agents, but provided few details
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
so Charlottesville is our Kapp Putsch, January 6th is our Beer Hall Putsch and just like with those, the assholes who participated run the government now. And just saying, between 1920 and 1923, Germany killed *way* more fascists in the streets, and they still ended up in charge of the Third Reich.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
My man looks like the Allan of the Good Guy Dolls line from Child’s Play.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Oh. Well then they should stop. www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
theguardian.com
OpenAI boss and Elon Musk back calls to put brakes on ‘reckless’ AI development
Rare show of unity from rival developers after safety warnings from Anthropic boss and AI researchers
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Jennifer X. Pumpkins 🎃 @jenyetagain.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
i feel like i've got to say it every once in a while: i'll mock ai for anything because i hate it, i have and will continue to mock it for things that could, conceivably, be solved. those aren't why i hate it. i hate it for unsolvable reasons which disqualify the entire venture.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Just finished Night Watch by Terry Pratchett, and gotta say: This is why responsible worlds have a secret order of Time Monks. Cuz of the quantum.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Release the Only Jokes cut.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
My dad died last week. My kid brother remembers that when he got home from school, Dad said “there was a disaster today. A lot of people died.” Then he asked if my brother wanted to play catch. They threw a ball back & forth while waiting for Mom & I to get home, & Dad tried to answer his questions.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
The main things I remember about 9/11: The first kid who walked out from where there was a TV as we were on our way between classes and said “a plane just flew into the World Trade Cenyer.” The second kid who said “shut the fuck up,” and laughed.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
I’m not gonna say no cis man should ever be an OB-GYN, but I am gonna say that if his other job is being a republican senator, then his practice has more in common with the Department of Licenses & Inspections than with the Hippocratic Oath.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Paul Frazee, upon discovering that toasters sometimes make something that looks kinda like a face on the toast and people think it’s Jesus:
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Happy Labor Day y’all. Adding to an overwhelming body of evidence that the regime‘s entire worldview comes from hanging out in weird-smelling corners of the internet: the Federal Government has concluded that trans girls are all violent Stalinists. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...
theguardian.com
‘Nakedly political’: US attempts to link trans support to authoritarianism in new health department report
HHS releases report linking ‘gender ideology’ to political violence – a study scientists say was poorly conducted
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Antebellum politics is fascinating, the South kept getting policy concessions and whipped themselves up into a paranoid rage anyway, essentially because they couldn't stand being culturally judged for having slaves
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Strangers in a Tangled Wilderness @tangledwilderness.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
If someone who loves you has ever grown or cooked something delicious for you you have known contentment that is as far out of Elon Musk's reach as his wealth is of yours.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Happy Labor Day y’all. Adding to an overwhelming body of evidence that the regime‘s entire worldview comes from hanging out in weird-smelling corners of the internet: the Federal Government has concluded that trans girls are all violent Stalinists. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...
theguardian.com
‘Nakedly political’: US attempts to link trans support to authoritarianism in new health department report
HHS releases report linking ‘gender ideology’ to political violence – a study scientists say was poorly conducted
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Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Apparently people are sharing this far and wide on social media, which I think is horrible. This could cripple ICE operations. PLEASE do not share this.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Goddamnit gang, fascists are stealing our outfit again. Someone email Soros and tell him he needs to cut an extra check for everyone on staff in Antifa Outreach this month so that Black Bloc can update our look:
Hyperreflective Rainbow Bloc
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
This is all fascinating speculation, but we know that the first humans in Ireland came with Noah’s daughter Cesair and Fintan mac Bochra and some others who decided that fucking off west was a better plan than dying in some flood just because god didn’t like sinning all of a sudden.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
www.vice.com/en/article/h...
vice.com
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Star Trek V: The Next Yard Over
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talia jane @taliajane.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
U.S. State Department has designated leftist tech group Autisti/Inventati (A/I) a FTO, accusing it of ties to terrorist orgs due to the group’s encrypted platforms such as Noblogs, a popular blogging platform with leftist groups. A/I responded rebuking the designation: “We will not back down.”
"Today we were made aware that the US
Government has targeted a small, volunteer-run, technology collective from Italy with
disproportionate sanctions as anyone can read in the Treasury Department Statement, the State Department Statement and the related Executive Order.
We deny all allegations included in the statements, while we strongly affirm our dedication to providing a platform of tools for digital self-defense, addressing the need of free communication for activists and other individuals, groups and associations.We will not back down, we will keep doing what we have been doing all these years and we will do whatever is in our possibility to counter the false allegations made by a politically desperate administration with the sole intention of swaying people and media attention away from their own violence and warmongering.
Antifascism and anticapitalism are not terrorism.
Protesting is not terrorism. And everyone has the right to speak out and to struggle for humanity.
Collettivo Autistici / Inventati — 'Socializzare saperi senza fondare poteri'
Stay human
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Today’s disappointment: learning the name Enes Kanter, and that this is not the name of a wizened old bubbe in Havana who has wild stories about blowing up the Reich’s train bridges back during the war.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
“land a interview with Maddow” is the new “impress Jodie Foster”
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Leah Sottile @leahsottile.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
One of the most exciting things happening in Portland today is the city desperately trying not to exploding whale this building.
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John Scalzi @scalzi.com · 17/08/2026
"AI" has existed in its current form for barely four years and the fact that it's jammed up the cognitive development of an entire generation that fast (and that there's a specific overclass of techofascists who are deeply thrilled about this) is a big damn red flag. www.nytimes.com/2026/08/17/u...
nytimes.com
What Do Students Lose When They Stop Writing? (Gift Article)
Educators are worried that many students can no longer write essays without A.I. And it’s costing more than just grammar skills.
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Chef Kennedy🐸🏳️‍🌈 @kennedy.northsky.social · 13/08/2026
Woke 1 is dying. Woke 2 struggles to be born. Now is the time of Woke 1 Game of the Year Deluxe Remastered Edition
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Oddworld: Abe’s Oddysee
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Erin Fogg says Free Link @criminalerin.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Ah well what's the torturous needless preventable deaths of thousands of people a year when a stolen car is now pancaked into a tree
sfchronicle.com
First-of-its-kind database: Majority of people killed in police chases aren’t the fleeing drivers
The majority of people killed in police chases in the United States were passengers or bystanders, first-of-its-kind data analysis shows.
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
first heard this story as “from now on his face is on passports,” which would be bad. But it’s actually “other nations’ customs officials will immediately be able to identify people who sought out the limited-edition dictator crime guy passport,” which is fine. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...
theguardian.com
State department to offer Trump-branded US passports nationwide
Passports with the president’s portrait, previously only available in DC, will be offered at 27 agencies nationwide
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jessamyn @librarian.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
I work at a public library. People who want to use AI seem to have no trouble doing so. People who don't want to use AI have a harder time. I crowdsourced and then finalized this document "How to disable or avoid intrusive AI" and then gave it a short URL: notoai.org Please pass along if it's useful
An aircraft passenger oxygen mask: a drop down passenger mask with air bag and yellow plastic mouth and nose cover, oxygen tube has been cut; Demonstration model used by flight attendant crew for passenger instruction. Has text on the side indicating that it's non-functional.
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Jared Pechaček @vandroidhelsing.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
things are kinda dour today, so let’s get a singalong going! repeat after me: KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQATSI KOYAANISQA
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
k so the Oddyssey movie is prob fine, but hear me out: The Odyssey, starring: Bugs Bunny as Odysseus Daffy Duck as Agamemnon Tweety Bird as Telemachus Penelope Pussycat as Penelope Sylvester as Antinous Pepe Le Pew as Amphinomus Pepe Le Pew as Eurymachus Pepe Le Pew as Leocritus
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Write A More Inscrutably British Headline Challenge- Impossible
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Pat Savage @patrickesavage.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
Time for another note about the Trump administration’s approach to funding US science. But let me make something clear right up front. When I talk to people about this subject (and that includes some journalists as well) and say what I'm about to at the end of this paragaph I am sometimes met with disbelief. But I mean what I say and I am trying my best to say what I mean: The Trump administration hates academic science funding, full stop. They hate where that money goes, and they hate who it goes to. They want to keep all that money for themselves, to hand out to favored cronies who can help them get elected and to steer yet more money and more power back into their hands.

That’s it. That’s the story. They are naturally not putting it in those words, but instead talking about “gold standard science” and the “reproducibility crisis” and funding “bold inquiry” for “transformational breakthroughs”. This is all bullshit, and it’s important to realize that.
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Pookleblinky @pookleblinky.bsky.social · 19/04/2024
An economist will look at a thing and come up with a hundred explanations for it, each assuming abstract reasoning and ethics and such. That marine biologist will go "this one is eating the other one."
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
Anyway remember how trump university had to pay out $25 million to former students?
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Gingerspiced @gingerspiced.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Pete Hegseth: "We need our warriors to embrace the Spartan mindset" U.S. Military: *suffers crushing defeat to the Persians*
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45th Parallel Absurdist Brigade @45thabsurdist.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
“It’s not rape, I just physically overpowered someone to force them to have sex,” I would like you to meet my good friend, “It’s not assault, I used the elastrator, and that’s just farm equipment.”
The Elastrator, a common piece of equipment used in animal husbandry that’s really effective at cutting off blood flow to the testicles and scrotum, resulting in a short period of discomfort, rapid tissue death, and the above organs shriveling up like raisins and falling off within a week or two.
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