iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Before anyone gets the idea, this is something I've been turning over in my head for a while and has nothing to do with the recent news and is in no way a defense of any of the predators that we've heard about. I hope every rapist has their lives ruined if they're not just entirely castrated.

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Maybe this whole thread is "men's rights" or whatever but I'm just so tired. I'm exhausted, it took so long to even consider I could be a man. I'm still nonbinary but that's also just a nebulous, self-defined personhood. I want to *feel* like a good man. I need guidance and role models, not disgust.

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I'm genuinely tired of having to constantly doubt I'm transitioned enough or masculine enough or not-woman enough because I'm moving in a direction that people blindly hate that we refuse to define as anything but negative and disgusting. Even when I started T I was afraid of masculinizing too much.

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Femininity is soooo spelled out. It was incredibly easy to pretend to be a woman pre-T. But my entire view of masculinity was deer locking antlers and the man working a 9-5 for his family he never saw. Sweat, lust, aggression, stoicism thinly hiding a natural born desire to abuse. That was it.

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We should be teaching boys what they CAN grow up into (or transition into). All I hear is "I hate men who do this". No wonder some of them look for role models that tell them they can grant them freedom. A man doesn't need to be breadwinner or head of the house to have positive masculine traits.

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Now I should state that man ultimately failed me in other ways and I had to move on BUT the point is that I had had decades of training to view all of these attributes of men OVER their personhood. (I'm not saying if someone is a rapist they deserve any respect or anything, rapists should be shot.)

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The thing that had to happen to me was dating a man who did everything in his power to show me he wasn't dangerous. And he had to do that because my first relationship WAS a dangerous sex pest who pressured me and demolished my boundaries. Because I was taught *that is normal, that is what men do*.

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Because I was taught that no matter how he acts, even the kindest, softest man was actually holding back a violent crazy pervert on the inside. So how could I be one of those? Now, I look to men like Tom Holland and other sweet, bubbly men and think "thank god I found my archetype."

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And yeah, there are a lot of terrible men to point to as examples, which is why I spent 17-24 hating being a woman and just assuming that was normal because I had already decided I 'didn't relate' to men because I was good natured and polite and strong willed. I had no good examples that mattered--

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And I'm not saying "no one wants to hear this" because I feel shame about having this view, more that everyone is so much more satisfied with their demonization of all men ever than they would be teaching boys that they have the potential to grow up into something that isn't a rage demon sex pest.

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 19h

I know no one wants to hear this but the culture where we always tell daughters that all men are evil crazy monsters made it really really really hard for me to transition and I would have avoided actual decades of suicide attempts if I hadn't been taught to think men aren't *literally just people*

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We lost something as a society when we started punishing people super harshly for beating asses for anti-social behavior. If you play music out loud on the train someone should be able to slam your head into the wall a few times without consequence, because you deserve it.

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Reposted by Vepsilon

I'm not leading the much needed uprising because I'm a destitute disabled person trying to stay fed and housed. You aren't leading the uprising because you work 50 hours a week to pay off two cars, a single family house, and feed three dogs. We are not actually in the same boat.

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It's so funny to me when contrarian weirdos like this just get completely ignored. Like, you're quote tweeting yourself at a stranger who's just posting a quote agreeing with the original post. What are you actually doing lmao

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It is fully legal in the state of oregon to rent someone an apartment that you provably KNOW is infested with bugs, you just have to fix the infestation after the tenant reports it. What a disgusting, deeply sick society we live in. Landlords should be rounded up and thrown into a volcano.

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Whatever you do, if you have a place to live that is *at all* habitable, do not rent with CCC. All this fluff about supportive this and case manager that, they knowingly sold me an apartment that is infested with dangerous pests!! Fuck this city for letting this happen to vulnerable people.

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What I said in my report, and my partner had to repeat on the phone, is that they aren't spraying enough units. Later we get a letter on our door, they know reported them and that they're gonna do a building-wide spray in November. This place had dead roaches in it when we moved in!! November???

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Portland government is such a joke. I reported the roach problem (happening since we moved in) to the city health department and at first they just said "well your property manager said they sprayed, that should do it" when I specifically mentioned *in my report* that it didn't work! Maybe read it!

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Sable, Final Girl 🏳️‍⚧️ @ghostlysable.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

My apartment building manager actually left us a real life letter asking us to not kill the roaches infesting our apartment because that way the poison spray could get back to their nest. Like mhmm ok bitch how about we just don't sell people apartments infested with bugs? Let's start there. :)))

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Reposted by Vepsilon

not only will the closet kill you, it will hurt the entire time you're dying

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Reposted by Vepsilon

Hannah Shelley, MLIS (Maggots, Lycanthropes & Ice Skeletons) @hannahshelley.site · 02/10/2026

Please stop anthropomorphizing computers. They cannot "run" a program, because they don't have legs

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I'm so physically anxious I should probably see a doctor but if I miss any more class I'll get dropped so I'm forced to do my best today barely breathing with blurry vision and numb hands. This is an inhumane way to make someone live. I wanna throw myself off a bridge.

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

The people quote posting this being like "good on him for not tolerating abuse" or "so many toxic people to block in the replies" are pathetic, whining crybabies that need given a wedgie and stuffed into a locker. You people are practically incapable of changing your own diapers.

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

You have genuinely spelled out things so clearly that the quote tweets and responses from people who don't understand have to be misinterpreting things on purpose, it's really incredibly simple.

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Turns out it was "the plumber" and its back on now that I'm home because I almost had an anxiety attack. Really cool how it's illegal to do this unless it's "an emergency maintenance issue" so basically any time they want they can just take water away and call it that and we just have to suffer.

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Trying to tell myself that I'm brave for crashing and burning for a whole week because at least I tried to push myself (knowing I was probably going to crash and burn)

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I'm like actually going to cry in public today I wish I could call out sick so badly I'm so god damn tired of being dirty and stinking and being late and not being able to afford anything ever no matter how hard I work! Fuck this life! Fuck Portland and fuck America for making this happen to people.

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I have a screenshot now of google maps showing me the train leaves at a certain time and it saying "walk, 7 minutes" AND THEN TELLING ME TO LEAVE 5 MINUTES BEFORE IT ARRIVES. WHY CAN I NOT REPORT THIS. WTAF.

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Aaand late to class because google maps lied again. "Left 2 minutes ago" no it didn't. I was watching the stop as I came down the hill for a full 4 minutes and saw no train. So it was either several minutes early to it's stop or it didn't come at all. Either way now I'm accountable for being late :)

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I can't imagine going to work as one of the three sane SC justices and not like, poisoning the fucking coffee. Like are we serious? Am I just built different why are these people standing by and watching??

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They fucked up my hygiene last week too because the only laundry room on my floor flooded for some reason and I couldn't do laundry for like 3 days. No other options provided, just, get fucked people who pay us money. Cause like what are a bunch of stupid poors gonna do? Makes me wanna burn shit.

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The cold water just.... doesn't work in my apartment this morning. The shower doesn't come on at all. Guess I'm going to class stinky 😒. I cannot believe these people are charging almost $1000 for this shithole, Portland 'affordable' housing is a joke and a scheme. So tired of this constant BS.

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

"Or just argue with me it's easier" you are the most intolerable kind of person

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Pathetic bag of rotting feces can't even explain to a single person what good this does for the public. You sniveling garbage worm, the only good thing you will produce is a warm carcass to feed bacteria the second you finally decide to end this worthless agitation you call a life. Kill yourself.

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

My discover feed is broken is that happening to anyone else or did I do a thought crime

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Reposted by Vepsilon

Kat Tenbarge @kattenbarge.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

There’s something to be said for how most of the political spectrum can unite around hounding some lesbians over niche drama in their spaces but huge segments of society are silent about pervasive campus rape impacting a huge population of primarily youngwomen

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

I don't understand how so many people that don't understand dead names work in government and medical offices. Yes I realize no one ever updated my name and you just now found my info under another name. No you do not need to refer to me as that name or say it like 10 fucking times. Christ!!

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Vepsilon @vepsilon.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Good job with the 'strongly worded letter' this time. You do realize sitting on your ass and waggling your finger does literally nothing right? So explain to your voters why you are doing nothing?

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Reposted by Vepsilon

Ben Seager @benseager.co.uk · 28/09/2026

So just this morning I’ve seen: - someone taking a phone call while driving - someone FaceTiming(!) while driving - Two people driving through red lights at a busy junction. This was in the space of about 10 minutes. Can we have a *actual* war on motorists please. One where they actually lose.

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rprobbins.bsky.social @rprobbins.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Makes me pretty frustrated that a lot of jobs that pay enough for a car, jobs that I'd do well at at least, require a car in the first place. I don't make enough to get one until I get paid more. Idk if I'm making sense I'm just so tired of making barely enough to afford my small, boring life.

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Reposted by Vepsilon

Make it make some sense already 😳😡

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Lmao the person I responded to blocked me, there is no way to take these "buh professionalism !!" people seriously

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