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Vanessa Biscuits

@vanessabiscuits.bsky.social
182 followers 48 following 931 posts

Waiting for this nightmare to end.

PostsRepliesMedia
Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 30m
That’s what Dan was saying. I was like if the person doesn’t exist and you’re combining people then sure whatever but it’s well documented that it’s a guy just make it a guy.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 32m
Yea I’m like how many documentaries have there been? I think we all know it was a guy.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 34m
I know that. I’m talking about the FBI guy who analyzes his linguistics.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 52m
Why is a girl the one who figures out who the unabomber is in the Netflix Unabomber movie? Don’t we all know it was a guy?
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 1h
That makes sense. I’d been putting it off since we had to find a new dentist in Arlington.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 3h
This makes me irrationally angry.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 3h
When they call and are like “hang up and I’ll transfer it” and sometimes I’m like go back to voicemail.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 4h
So he’s making it a burrito?
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 4h
Exactly. I saw you called and your email. I’m choosing to ignore for now.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 4h
Clearly only Dan notices these things because when I went I put in my AirPod and listened to my podcast.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
That was 100% on purpose.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I just got an email from a plaintiff’s attorney saying she is not in the business of suing people.
static.klipy.com
Drew Scanlon Blinking Eyes Meme Reaction
ALT: Drew Scanlon Blinking Eyes Meme Reaction
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Why is calling any place such a hassle now? Your AI chat box is trash.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
“Mama - you gonna say anything about me tearing this basket up?”
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I’m like relax dude you’re wet for like 2 seconds. Tho after about 5 mins he realized it wasn’t trying to kill him lol.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I’m tempted to do that but also I’m like he’s 4 months old and we’ve had him for 3 weeks. He does really good sometimes and then just puppy spazzes. We will see how it goes. He is just so much energy lol. Today is horrible because he cannot go outside because it’s raining and he’s like BUT WHY
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
So many Zoomies.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I don’t know how you do it. It’s exhausting. I had to take him outside because he was running into the doors and started to try to parkour off the couch and I was like no we are not doing that inside.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Ever seen a dog on crack?
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Ricky Martin is Puerto Rican and not Brazilian.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
This new update is trash. My phone constantly freezes now.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Mine did this too. I had to reset the cell network settings.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Marcel cannot throw a complete pass.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Someone call a medic.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Never ever search anything Dan says on your work laptop. #tips
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Physically or emotionally? I think like 5 years ago I was like nah I’m never having kids. This puppy confirms the choice. Putting your kids in a kennel for hours while you go out is illegal.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Dear lord.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Murphy stopped barking at the paper shredder and rumba .. however my AirPod is a different story.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
I am always cold. Dan is always hot. I think he wants those or some other kind. He is kind and bought a heating blanket that has separate settings. Whoever designed it really was married lol
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Bless him. Izzy is like “when am I ever going to use this?!” I’m like well excel is useful.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I’ll take it. I sleep w an electric blanket. Dan does not like the heater on high but when he’s done? 74 please.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
He woke me up at 3a, 5am and 7am. Now he wants to sleep and suck up to me.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Izzy is having to do statistics w excel and I’m like what in the hell even is that?
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Yep. Now in the winter completely different story.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Ugh. Dude we were given a quote on how much it would be to replace our roof and even tho it’s so durable. I know why most people have to switch out of clay roofs when it’s time. The price is absurd.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Yea. They told us it could easily last another 25 years (it’s 42 years now) but up to 50 if we maintain it properly. The roof was a giant selling point for me.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Normally, I I would consider it however, our roof is Clay tile and I don’t want to ruin it by putting solar panels up. It’s literally just a gorgeous roof. It’s the original from when the house was built. 
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
1000% that’s the pool. Given that it’s been 100+ outside we have to run it 11 hours a day. Shit is expensive.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I’ll switch yall bills. lol. Ours was $700 last month
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
74 on one side and 72 the other. At night 72 and the other 69.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Holy shit. This chicken and waffles with egg and cheese is amazing. @ntmellie.bsky.social why must you share these things.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Yes and @dannybiscuits.bsky.social hates it.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
You’re welcome!
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
@suge-white.bsky.social happy birthday!
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Wanna know why he’s exhausted? He’s gearing up to vault over the gate.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I love him too when he’s asleep and calm. When he’s Osama Bin Murphy? I can do without.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
The only time this dog is calm is when he’s asleep. He just decided a hat is his mortal enemy. The hat has been there a week.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I’m ok w that.
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Hope Lola is good!
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Vanessa Biscuits @vanessabiscuits.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Oh god Boise is horrible!
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