iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

Tim Hortons launched several new items for their Harry Potter collaboration. The foreign owned coffee chain that still uses a maple leaf in their branding to trick people into thinking they are still Canadian announced that a portion of all sales will go to their Conversion Camp Day fund.

Lilac purple background that gradients through different shades. Top middle is a red maple leaf with a white "Tims" across it. Under which in large capital letters says "CONVERSION CAMP DAY". The word Conversion is white with a red border, while Camp Day is alternating blue and yellow letters with a white border. Underneath shows 4 Harry Potter themed donuts and 1 Harry Potter themed donut box.

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Joey Coleman @joeycoleman.ca · 28/07/2026

A milestone in Hamilton's cybersecurity failure recovery. 27 months later, the clocks at the MacNab Transit Terminal are now working. #yhmcc

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

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curiouskittyk.bsky.social @curiouskittyk.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

WTAF Carney said "That's our point, who knows if there'll be anything left to see next year."

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

Ontario Premier Ford announced today that his Government will be filing a lawsuit against the US Forest Service. The suit alleges that Smokey the Bear, the US Forest Service's mascot, was not specific enough in pointing out exactly who can prevent forest fires.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

The government launched an ad campaign telling Canadians that they can visit national parks for free this summer. When asked about the optics of launching such a campaign while half the country is on fire, Carney said "That's our point, who knows if there'll be anything left to see next year."

Screenshot from the ad campaign. Shows Carney and four others standing on a trail with grass on either side and trees in the background. Carney is wearing a white shirt and dark blue pants, the other people are wearing uniform green shirts and beige pants or skirts. Text over the middle says "with the Canada Strong Pass"

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

Conservative MPP Donna Skelly was at Tim Horton's today promoting Camp Day—a day when a foreign multi-billion dollar company asks everyday Canadians to donate to a good cause—saying "I'm confident in our government's ability to extinguish the wildfires at the campgrounds before the kids arrive."

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

Mayor Horwath decreed that Council hold a special meeting today to learn about the special interests of data centre lobbyists. When asked why today's meeting was necessary the mayor said "We've heard from the public on the issue, but we didn't take the time to listen what the money has to say."

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

In a recent interview George Lucas talked about his love for generative AI; referencing changes he made to the original Star Wars trilogy starting in 1997, "I was into AI slop before it was cool, I've always been a fan!"

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 30/06/2026

A #HamOnt Mayoral Candidate is raising the alarm to ensure everyone knows that the voter registry is a thing that exists & that candidates are given access to it. "If they'd give this information to me, they'd give it to anyone!" warns the candidate in over a dozen identical Facebook posts.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

Prime Minister Carney met with a group of top RCMP officers today. Tasked with training law enforcement across the country, these highly skilled men & women will be instrumental in the rollout of Canada's new Combating Hate with Hate Act.

Prime Minister Mark Carney facing a group of uniformed RCMP officers. Carney is shaking hands with one in the middle. Most of the RCMP are wearing vests, light blue shirts, dark cop hats and pants both with a yellow band. There is one RCMP officer in the back wearing the red uniform with the tan hat and big brown leather boots.

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Joey Coleman @joeycoleman.ca · 20/06/2026

The Hamilton Fire Department is reporting a single alarm fire response. As per this term of Council's decision to decrease City Hall transparency, data provided does not state exact location. There are three HSR buses stopped on King Street West between Bay Street and Caroline Street. #HamOnt

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 27/02/2024

LETTERS | "Removing free parking won't solve the city's affordable housing crisis. We need to make parking spots wider so that big trucks like mine can have more place to park. My truck is easily big enough for a family of 3, just can't park it anywhere!"—Kevin, downtown. #HamOnt

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 31/08/2023

Doug Ford added 5 addresses to the Ontario Greenbelt today. These addresses—all of which contain homes of reporters who questioned the premier about his Greenbelt promise—are already developed & will need to be returned to a more natural state. Cartoon by @davidbrace2.bsky.social.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 10/06/2026

Thanks to Carney's "Elbows Up" slogan VPN companies in Canada are seeing a surge in interest as patriotic Canadians look for domestic options to spoof a US IP address as Carney's Online Harms bill is expected to pass into law by the end of the summer.

Mark Carney mid speech, left hand in front of his chest mid gesticulation.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 10/06/2026

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 07/02/2026

The HATS program was to provide tiny homes for folks experiencing homelessness. Over four years into the program and council is still debating how to implement. "Residents want us to do something, but it's hard" says one Clr, "Why can't they just volunteer their front lawns & make our job easy?"

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Joey Coleman @joeycoleman.ca · 04/02/2026

If someone files a Freedom of Information request about this new tracking system, the response will be the City cannot process the FOI request at this time due to the ongoing impacts of the cybersecurity failure.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 04/02/2026

City Hall to be decked out in construction-paper chains, popcorn garland, & classic red & white bunting as the city prepares to celebrate the 2 year anniversary of the Feb 25th, 2024 cyber-attack that helped the municipal bureaucracy & administration adopt a less-digital approach to doing business.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 09/09/2025

The Canadian Department of Pedantry issued a reminder for Canadians today: If it doesn't come from Minister Champagne's office it isn't austerity; it's just sparkling neoliberalism.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 09/09/2025

The Canadian Department of Pedantry issued a reminder for Canadians today: If it doesn't come from Minister Champagne's office it isn't austerity; it's just sparkling neoliberalism.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

Council's decision to instruct staff to draft a maximum heat bylaw made Hamilton a national leader in 2023. Now, in 2025 Toronto is poised to be the first to cross the finish line. When asked why, #HamOnt city staff said "Toronto is just a better city run by better people."

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

Haldimand waste hauler convicted of illegally dumping raw sewage—judge advises owner of D&C Pumping Service to get into municipal politics if they want to be able to pollute natural waterways without consequence.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

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Lucy @lucycappiello.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

Do you guys want me to do it? I love making quorum.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

BREAKING | Trudeau, Poilievre, & Singh announce they are forming a band named The Political Spectrum Rejects.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

BREAKING | Even if they lose every remaining game, the Toronto Maple Leafs are safe from being the team that blew the biggest lead this week.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

BREAKING | Trudeau, Poilievre, & Singh announce they are forming a band named The Political Spectrum Rejects.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

BREAKING | Even if they lose every remaining game, the Toronto Maple Leafs are safe from being the team that blew the biggest lead this week.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 23/04/2025

Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre abandoned his "verb the noun" rhetoric on the campaign trail today. Instead, the lifelong politician told the crowd how much he appreciates the critiques of political pundit Steve Boots, adding that watching WTHC? is better than any cabinet meeting.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 23/04/2025

The archbishop of Toronto, Cardinal Frank Leo is headed to Rome for the conclave to elect the next Pope. If elected, Vatican experts say it is only a matter of time until maple syrup is decreed an appropriate substitute for the Eucharist.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

After the death of Pope Francis, conservatives across Canada are expressing anger at what they call an unfair & unjust system. "It's bad enough we didn't get to vote for PM, but now they won't let us vote for the new Pope either!" said one Protestant who failed both high school civics & religion.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 22/11/2024

After having a line of questioning ruled 'out of order' during public delegations regarding the 2025 budget, Clr Danko has hired 3 outside experts to assist him for future public delegations. There is no record of a public procurement process for the position.

An image of the three Spanish Cardinals representing the Spanish Inquisition from Monty Python's Flying Circus.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 22/11/2024

Hamilton city council looked at the rules surrounding public delegations today. Due to existing charter protections of freedom of expression citizens will continue to be allowed to delegate, but those deemed "troublemakers" may be required to do so from a pillory, at the chair's discretion. #HamOnt

An image of Hamilton City Council chambers with a wooden medieval style pillory added across from the speaker's lectern.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 22/11/2024

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Olga Bea 🐝 @obkwak.bsky.social · 22/11/2024

And Council shall be given discretion to pelt said delegate with rotten vegetables if they deem it necessary.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 22/11/2024

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

The average cost to rent a 1 bedroom apartment in Hamilton has fallen, ever so slightly, for the second month in a row. Prices have gone from 'wholly unaffordable', to 'virtually unaffordable', to now 'basically unaffordable'.

Three white pillars outside a residence with the top half of a "FOR RENT" sign visible.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

After Hamilton Police fatally shot a 43 year old man over the weekend one Clr took to social media to remind grieving members of a marginalized community that "Police officers don't murder people, people with badges murder people."

A picture of three police officers standing around at night wearing reflective vests. Two are standing on a sidewalk, one is standing on a roadway leaning into the passenger window of a car. Yellow police tape can be seen in the top left background. Part of a police vehicle that says POLICE can be seen in the bottom right foreground.

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

Shortly after the popular Portuguese restaurant Wild Orchid announced on social media that it would be closing its doors for good on Dec 31st, Forge & Foster Investments released the following statement:

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

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TheSpecPitchbot (Satire) @thespecpitchbot.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

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Tamara @procrastamara.bsky.social · 09/11/2024

I’m working on a starter pack for #HamOnt. Please let me know if you’d like to be added! go.bsky.app/2Y3sEAk

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