Sign in

Southern Illinois Chronicle

@thesic.net
36 followers 69 following 57 posts

Top satire from the bottom of the state

PostsRepliesMedia
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 19/09/2026
After shutting down a national cultural center for the performing arts and announcing a ban on critical news outlets from the White House, the Trump administration is expected to limit press communications to occasional updates, shouted angrily in German from a White House balcony.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 18/09/2026
An upcoming crafting and survival game will show an indicator of the player's prostate health in addition to other typical indicators. Devs say there isn't *much* to do for the gauge as it rises, though players can try a variety of poultices and untested button combinations to see if anything helps.
010
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 17/09/2026
Amid unprecedented partisan interference in the election process, state republicans were startled Wednesday to see Missouri fading from US Maps before their very eyes.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 16/09/2026
Facing mounting backlash after dropping Macklemore from his tour for making pro-Palestine statements, Ed Sheeran addressed the ongoing conflict by putting his signature folk-pop style on Donald Trump's 2017 hit, "Many Fine People on Both Sides."
021
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 12/09/2026
"Midwesturn" Becomes State Law
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 11/09/2026
Local Housing Market Rules if You Like Mine Tunnels
011
Reposted by Southern Illinois Chronicle
Todd Mitchell @toddnotmitchell.com · 02/07/2026
Don’t miss me at @ggtribune.com today exploring the important topic of AI rampancy. ggtribune.com/2026/07/02/a...
ggtribune.com
AI Stan Lee Blurting Wolverine Spoilers in Zoom Call Cameos
BURBANK, Calif. — Sources close to the matter have confirmed that an early build of the AI likeness of Stan Lee is running amok on Zoom’s cloud video call platform, shouting spoilers for Insomniac …
062
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 16/06/2026
Read more: substack.com/@thesic/note...
substack.com
SIC Staff (@thesic)
Iran Reaches Peace Agreement with Uninterested Nate Bargatze He just loves straits Reports described a tentative agreement on Monday outlining the reopening of the Strait of Hormuz and the end of ag...
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 16/06/2026
“I just really believe in straits,” Bargatze told reporters in Tehran. “They buy the most tickets to my shows, and they live the way the Bible says. I just think that’s neat.”
121
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 11/06/2026
*ahem*
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 03/06/2026
Missouri Defunds Dolly Parton Literacy Program After Someone Defines “Literacy” www.thesic.net/p/missouri-d...
thesic.net
Missouri Defunds Dolly Parton Literacy Program After Someone Defines "Literacy"
"Nice try, lady."
031
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 03/06/2026
Sheriff’s Office: Chicago Bears Free to Leave Thanks to Illinois SAFE-T Act Presumed innocence has ruined everything #satire #politics #midwest thesic.net/p/sheriffs-o...
thesic.net
Sheriff's Office: Chicago Bears Free to Leave Thanks to Illinois SAFE-T Act
Presumed innocence has ruined everything
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 01/06/2026
Data Servers Protest Human Building House in Midwest County to consider moratorium on humans
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 31/05/2026
Our prediction, his response. Points for nailing the tone, at least? 😅
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 29/05/2026
Trump Announces Musical Draft After Freedom 250 Dropouts Musicians must report to their nearest Guitar Center for processing www.thesic.net/p/trump-anno...
thesic.net
Trump Announces Musical Draft After Freedom 250 Dropouts
Musicians must report to their nearest Guitar Center for processing
011
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 25/05/2026
You can tell it’s AI because Zoning & Building didn’t shut it down.
0140
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 25/05/2026
Call me old fashioned, but there are a few things I just won’t do to build an audience.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 24/05/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/downstate-...
thesic.net
Downstate Updates #1
Target still sucks, Aurora got scammed, and republicans want a new state
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 24/05/2026
Target still sucks, Aurora got scammed, and republicans want a new state. This week’s Downstate Updates just dropped.
111
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 16/05/2026
Strike fear into the hearts of the competition during the big Forza Horizon 6 release weekend. IYKYK
011
Reposted by Southern Illinois Chronicle
Todd Mitchell @toddnotmitchell.com · 13/05/2026
I imagine they’ll malfunction about as often as before
011
Reposted by Southern Illinois Chronicle
Jon Poole @total2total.bsky.social · 12/05/2026
Morning 😂.
Cat biting a picture.
170187972324
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 13/05/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/county-eme...
thesic.net
County Emergency Alerts Moving to Truth Social Premium
Notices still available to non-subscribers by FOIA request
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 13/05/2026
County Emergency Alerts Moving to Truth Social Premium Notices still available to non-subscribers by FOIA request
110
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 12/05/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/paying-cus...
thesic.net
Paying Customers Only People Not Playing Forza Horizon 6 Right Now
Playground Games warns honest players not to see or hear the game before May 19
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 12/05/2026
Paying Customers Only People Not Playing Forza Horizon 6 Right Now Playground Games warns honest players not to see or hear the game before May 19 #gaming #satire #racing
100
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 11/05/2026
The average person in that room is undersentenced.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 11/05/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/why-me-coo...
thesic.net
Why Me, Cookie Monster, Need to Audit Fort Cookie
It not what you think
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 11/05/2026
Why Me, Cookie Monster, Need to Audit Fort Cookie It not what you think
100
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 06/05/2026
When It finally happens, all the world will rejoice. Half because it’s over and half because they believe he is risen.
010
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 06/05/2026
Who are these people on the phone talking to for their entire drive on the morning commute?!
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 05/05/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/introducin...
thesic.net
Introducing the Midwest Parenting Commentary Guide
Featuring our new Zero Accountability Meter
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 05/05/2026
Introducing The Midwest Parenting Commentary Guide Featuring the new Zero Accountability Meter #midwest #parenting #satire
100
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 28/04/2026
Area Waiting for That Extra "No, Seriously" Storm Siren
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 22/04/2026
Happy Southern Illinois Republican Document Shredding Day to all who celebrate.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 15/04/2026
This is not medical advice.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 15/04/2026
People ask how folks deal with stress without drugs or alcohol. Buddy at the end of the day I jam those Q-tips in my ears like there’s money stashed in there.
100
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 15/04/2026
Not to mention the aerodynamic boost when they stand up after going all in during tv tournaments.
020
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 14/04/2026
It’s important to interface with the community you cover.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 13/04/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/new-contro...
thesic.net
New Controversy After Trump Uses AI to Depict Himself as JB Pritzker
Pope unfazed
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 13/04/2026
New Controversy After Trump Uses AI to Depict Himself as JB Pritzker Pope unfazed
100
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 12/04/2026
Can relate
010
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 12/04/2026
Think you know Southern Illinois? Take our Dispensary Name or Church Quiz! #SouthernIL #Satire #Midwest www.thesic.net/p/southern-i...
thesic.net
Southern Illinois Quiz: Dispensary Name or Church?
Do you come here to seek the face of God or to go to church?
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 11/04/2026
On starting a new outlet for satire in 2026, a recent history on the uncaring thumb of the Meta behemoth, and an AI support chat so bad I’m worried it damaged my brain… www.thesic.net/p/meta-is-dr...
thesic.net
Meta Is Draining My Will to Live
From the editor's desk
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 10/04/2026
Reports: God Developing a Community Facebook Group Admin Complex Carol help us www.thesic.net/p/reports-go...
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 08/04/2026
Read more: www.thesic.net/p/police-k-9...
thesic.net
Police K-9 Wants Suspect to Throw Gun Again
He won't let anyone else near it
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 08/04/2026
"Unprompted, Benson leapt from the woods with the firearm in his mouth, much to the concern of both the suspect and the officer. Benson then dropped the weapon at the suspect’s feet and waited like a good boy."
100
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 07/04/2026
It’s a great week in Illinois for those pants that unzip into four different lengths of shorts.
000
Southern Illinois Chronicle @thesic.net · 06/04/2026
I accidentally made frozen air fryer burgers from an ad for hearing aids the other day
110
Reposted by Southern Illinois Chronicle
Humor Satire Memes @funnysnarkyjoke.bsky.social · 06/04/2026
[on a recipe page] Me, begging, tears in my eyes: Please. Please, for the love of God, please just tell me where the recipe is
7386853