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Smams

@smams.bsky.social
2K followers 915 following 16K posts

Notable adult Pedant is spelled "peh-dunt" It's not a pepe, it's its own frog 1 like = 1 smam I couldn't decide between my snappy one-liner bios, so I put them all

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Reposted by Smams
caden cockburn @cadencockburn.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
We Spent The NIGHT In Grandma's CURSED Attic
thumbnail for "Moving back into my grandma's attic, WITHOUT her finding out this time"
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Deep cut, amazing
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Drinkable. Amazing
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Too amazing of reason
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
He is green for a unremarkable reason
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
they're group...
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Reposted by Smams
Smams @smams.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Hashtag wet but drying
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
The hardest part of creating a sentient AI is figuring out where to hide the prompts
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
you're preaching to the preach
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
now if only I can motivate myself to preserve access to my get motivated medicine
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
My country for a unified design doc
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Not great, but I've got a path forward
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
good evening
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
All these steam frame hopefuls forget that focusing on virtual reality is foolish. Develop your virtues, and then you will have access to the best reality.
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
say you're too busy writing your startup book # grindset # founder mindest # $
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
It's kind of crazy how the legacy of SNL is empirical proof that it's not the best way to make sketches
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I was thinking of it more like a "Yeow!" but I can still feel the passion
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
autoparts!
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Fuckheads who have no joy will spend hours researching the insulin meta, all but guaranteeing their day is successful. They do not begin to understand the fun and whimsy of leaving things to intuition and pure chance
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
The numbers escape me now. Something about them being in..
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
they're a real logistical challenge.
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I am the proud mother of innumerable fur babies
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Reposted by Smams
Jess @ennui-haver.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
i got a job picking up all the expended shell casings at the shooting range and everyone tries to shoot me like the golfball cart at the driving range
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The gay mer when exposed to the infinte economic potential of the poly mer: [evocative image or gif]
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I was at improv
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
You're gender neutral the way centrists are rights neutral
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
You FOOLS. You should have chosen unlimited BACON but no GAMES! With the advent of AI slop, we've found ourselves in your MAD world. Youve done it, are you happy? Games, Unlimited games, but... No games
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
If you start every post with "I am under attack" You can- Oh god! They've breached the-!
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Shocked Smams
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
USE EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF MICROWAVE TIME AS EFFICIENTLY AS POSSIBLE. If your microwave isn't FULL of heatable items you are WASTING precious MICROWAVES!!!!
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Help is close at hand
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
👍
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Cello suite no 1 bach (I think I can't check because I'm in class)
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
killing myself postponed until I become best in show
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I aim to please myself
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
bsky.app/profile/smam...
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Notes of grape
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Bumper sticker that reads: "I peaked in the spelling bee"
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
spelling is the basest form of linguistic skill, and is gauche at a certain level of mastery
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
a permanent jelq..
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
call my prince albert hostile architecture the way it makes it hard and potentially painful to grind
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
My favorite Duncan Trussel clip is him breathlessly describing his new cartoon project to his ostensible best buddy Joe Rogan. Joe's comments amount to "Yeah It looks soooo crazy..." and when Duncan excitedly asks if he's seen it Joe replies "No!".
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
This feels like a sanitized version of a "they'll all see..." monologue
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
TCG: "This unopened bag of doritos has an unknown, perhaps *inifinite* amount of cool ranch flavoring inside... My asking price? Don't be foolish, if you have to ask you can't afford it."
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I take pride in my studiousness, and or ability to be sorted, and or my taxonomics, or wait that's just sorting again
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
is this another "all horses are white horses"?
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The last unicorn? What about the one unicorn among many? The banality of the average unicorn in a sea of unicorn?
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Smams @smams.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
/give @self minecraft:titties
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