sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 24/09/2026my lover stands on golden sands #bloodymary #digitalart 0573
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 19/09/2026me at 12: wow I love listening to fall out boy and writing supernatural fanfiction me at 17: I think I should kill myself me at 22: wow I love listening to fall out boy and writing supernatural fanfiction 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 13/08/2026begging someone to give me a reason to use the recently-discovered pearjak 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 04/08/2026why did they call it maximum overdrive when they could’ve called it carmageddon 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 13/07/2026teenage girls will see 2 male youtubers and be like “is anyone gonna be a fujoshi about this” and then not wait for an answer 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 12/07/2026people often say “treat me as a god” to imply that they would get their will no matter what, no questions asked, but honestly, name someone that gets questioned more than god 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 26/06/2026when the getting stoned has a 35 minute video essay on a badly animated box office flop 010
Reposted by sam‼️Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 25/06/2026I went to the urinal at Blood House and I peed blood. But I didn't know if it was because I was in acute medical distress or if it was just the magic of Blood House. That's the sort of mystery that makes Blood House so special, to me. 08015
Reposted by sam‼️DUNSÖNs & DRAGGANs @dunsonndraggan.bsky.social · 25/06/2026You swing at the FRÄKEN with your flathead screwdriver. It takes 6 MDF damage. 011
Reposted by sam‼️Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · 26/06/2026I intend to keel over at an Olive Garden so that I’ll automatically be among my family when I die 1453
Reposted by sam‼️Kendra, spooky version @kendrawcandraw.bsky.social · 10/06/2026Got an ad for a sneaker that has a built in garage with a working door for your Hot Wheels car and was, for some reason, surprised that it only came in kid sizes 542101422
Reposted by sam‼️Dahlia @dahliablackthorne.bsky.social · 23/05/2026shredded lettuce is *not* a proper topping for a cheesburger, the only lettuce on a burger should be full leaf and that shredded crap can go in the salad. 21941
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 23/05/2026Talk shows have such influence in today’s society you kind of forget that they’re just called Talk Shows. It’s the Show where they Talk. That’s all it’s about 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 23/05/2026Used to wonder why a disproportionate amount of YouTubers had breakdowns about how stressed their job makes them then I just realized we all have those meltdowns, theirs are just on camera 100
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 23/05/2026You ever pronounce youtube like “You Tube”? We all just forgot it’s like a tube for you 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 17/05/2026we should invent a shower you can walk around in. like the whole room is a shower no matter where you walk there’s water falling so you’re always warm 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 17/05/2026dead wife flashback montage except one of the flashbacks is her fighting a raccoon 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 04/05/20261st half hour of being high: wee hehe yippee yay!! 🤩🥰 2nd half hour: dunno about sleep. why is it in the terms of use for my body that being completely shutdown and useless for 1/3 of its lifetime is absolutely mandatory and will render the product unusable if I don’t do that 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 04/05/2026does it ever amaze yall just how big Minecraft is. I feel like we don’t appreciate that enough 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 16/01/2026I love how everyone is like “horses are only for the rich! you need to have a lot of money and take good care of them!” and then every video of horse ownership is the muddiest animal you’ve ever seen with someone yelling “CROUTON IF YOU DON’T GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE I’LL SELL YOU TO THE GLUE FACTORY” 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 01/08/2025THIS IS MY GUY AND ALSO MY FAVORITE ATTACK I GOT THIS YEAR AAA!!! 010
Reposted by sam‼️Maileigh Holdstock @maileighholdstock.bsky.social · 28/07/2025The animated version of my 14th artfight revenge ✨ it was a nice little challenge to figure out the breathing and I love how it worked ✨ Revenge for @samwisest.bsky.social #artfight #art #animation #digitalart #teamcrystal 022
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 20/04/2025headcanons and ao3 and discussion posts aren’t enough I need to lock Eric kripke in a room and make him explain all 15 seasons 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 11/04/2025When I was younger I really thought junkyard dogs with spiked collars would be a bigger problem than they are 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 26/03/2025just remembered I can post whatever the fuck I want. I repainted this dinosaur and gave him a fish. fuck you 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025what if we AAHHHH AAA AHAHHHH AHHHH AAAAAA HELP AHHHHHA AAAAAA 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025the last hour has just been “I should really go to sleep” and then thinking of something else only I will find funny and posting it 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025god I bet the x men never have to deal with any of this. I was born weird and people want me dead for it why can’t I live in a mansion with sugar daddy Patrick Stewart because of it 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025yeah I’ll be fine all I need is a massage therapist and a regular therapist and fifty thousand dollars and a one way plane ticket and to forgive my father and 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025dear Hank Green, I know that words we have come from other earlier words, like Latin roots and stuff, but how did they come up with them in the first place. where did the roots start. where is the word tree 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025boomer humor: I hate my wife gen X humor: I hate my life millennial humor: I hate everyone gen z humor: I hate myself 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025I’m so sorry if I talk about myself too much it’s a genuine insecurity. It’s also fucking insane cause I hate that guy why can’t I shut up about him 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025I think I should be sleeping in a bunch of leaves. like on the forest floor. maybe I’ll hold onto an acorn and put my back to a rock. or tuck myself in a little hole. oh fuck yeah 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025I think I would be a good general. telling my guys to go get those other guys. must feel great 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025god I post like a fucking millennial. I should be hanged 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025saying phrases like “I go into work at 7:30 on wednesday” and “I need 2 more college credits for my degree” and “I should check the oil in my car” feel like the death of younger me. I remember when I didn’t know what any of that shit meant 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025swear to god I’m 13 and 45 at the same time. posting about the news and having to go in to work tomorrow like adult bullshit but also I am laying on a pillow pet right now 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025I like my boss and I don’t want him to be concerned for me, so I’ve tried to tone down the jokes about killing myself. but he keeps talking about politics and I keep wanting to kill myself about it so what’s a guy to do 110
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025so glad my job doesn’t know I’m here I love having a god awful digital footprint 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025news lately is like in Mario kart when you get hit with a shell, and then right when you finally stop spinning and your character stops crying and you’re able to drive again, another one comes and you’ve only gone like 5 feet 000
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025reading the news these is just “why did they do that. why did they do that. why did they fucking do that” 010
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025don’t quite have my Bluesky algorithm so my feed right now is just like a political post and then porn and then Patton Oswalt saying something about jazz clubs 110
sam‼️ @samwisest.bsky.social · 18/03/2025it’s in the nature of humanity to reinvent the journal every now and then. I’m the same as a Victorian peasant except now the whole village can see the little heart I drew around Jedediah’s name 000
