Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 25/09/2026TIRED: The “Inside you are two wolves” meme WIRED: 140
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Look, man, I just wanted to borrow some figs. I didn't know I'd have to jump through all these hoops. 020
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 18/09/2026My 85 friends who came to IKEA with me: All this shopping is making us hungry! Me: You’re not gonna believe this 120
Reposted by Ray ValleseRon Marz @ronmarz.bsky.social · 23/08/2026Jake Lang getting his Nazi ass beaten by Spider-Man in Minneapolis today is the ray of sunshine I needed. 10671381601
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 08/08/2026Hello mortals! Here on your Prime world, the land is on fire, the air is full of smoke, there is heat so hot it kills you, the water is too much or not enough, and the food makes your bowels explode. Why did no one tell Xanxost how wonderful this world is?? 072
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 02/08/2026Hello from Gen Con mortals! Xanxost is sorry about the big storm. Xanxost packed some chaos stuff from Limbo for the trip and it got loose. 042
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 31/07/2026Many beings enjoy doing this to slaadi because the rough skin scrubs their face clean! Sometimes clean off. 0102
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 31/07/2026Greetings from Gen Con mortals! The spellslingers on the beach forgot to announce that they are teaming up with Xanxost to make books about Xanxost! The reason they forgot is they do not know it yet. But Xanxost will show them it is a good idea! Xanxost just needs to get some rocks first. 171
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 29/07/2026Hello mortals! It is Gen Con time in your famous city Indianapolisburg! Xanxost will be there to research what mortals are saying about the planes. If you see Xanxost, please come up and say "Hello Xanxost!" Try not to look like food when you do it. 053
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 24/07/2026Hello mortals! Did you know the Outer Planes also have a famous story called The Odyssey? It is the story of a man who takes a crew and sets out to travel the entire Great Ring but they go to Limbo first and a red slaad eats them. It is a short story. 082
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 23/07/2026Prompting an LLM is like making a wish in a roleplaying game. You've gotta be very careful with the wording or you won't like the results. 130
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 23/07/2026There are ways to trim your videogame development budget, and then there are *ways* to trim your videogame development budget. 5071351681
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 20/07/2026Elf fingers work best when prepared with surprise. You sneak up to the elf while they are busy thinking about barmy elf things and rip their fingers off. Sometimes the hand or arm comes off too and that is okay. Just keep practicing! 053
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 20/07/2026Hello mortals! Xanxost hears there is a Prime Material Plane lettuce that makes your butt explode. Oho! All glory to your graybeards for creating the perfect snack and/or weapon of war. Xanxost is coming with two bags of holding! Do you take elf fingers in trade? 162
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 16/07/2026Hello mortals! Xanxost was asked how to stay cool when it is very hot outside. The answer is simple! Dig a big hole and fill it with cold liquid like high elf blood or wood elf blood or dark elf blood or sea elf blood. Then leave it and go on a vacation to the Ice Wastes of the Abyss. 011
Reposted by Ray ValleseXanxost @xanxost.bsky.social · 12/07/2026Hello mortals! Xanxost met a new dretch in the Abyss who says his name is Linseed. His new job is licking Juiblex clean and he will be good at it because he did the same thing for a big smelly blob in his mortal life. The lesson is experience counts! Prepare for the afterlife you want! 1114
Reposted by Ray ValleseJesse Hawken @jessehawken.bsky.social · 12/07/2026Bringing one of the best tweets of all time over to Bluesky in honour of the Three Lions QF victory 6292362070
Reposted by Ray Vallesejosh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 07/09/2025I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects 393812670
Reposted by Ray VallesePersonasama @persona.bsky.social · 14/06/2026Sucks that this 64 year old Rocky & Bullwinkle joke still hits now 91111504129
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 12/06/2026Reading the Swan Boy webcomic is like being stuck on a tour bus hijacked by a confused wizard who shows you all the coolest stuff you wouldn't have seen otherwise 010
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 09/06/2026We don’t usually get to see each other’s header images. Here’s mine. I stand by this statement. 040
Reposted by Ray Vallese🎃Nosferascoob🎃 @scoobydouchebag.bsky.social · 28/05/2026The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And hamburger to help before I sleep, And hamburger to help before I sleep. 511718
Reposted by Ray ValleseHello, it's Dan McDaid @danmcdaid.bsky.social · 16/05/2026Got a notification from a medieval copyright lawyer 122156782657
Reposted by Ray ValleseTy Templeton @tytempleton.bsky.social · 29/03/2026This was originally rejected by my editor at Marvel, but it was always one of my favourites, so you get to see it here! Sunday Funnies YAY! 843789
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 23/03/2026@tomlommel.com I'm finally watching Paradise and hear the president say "Where are my nerds?" and see this. Maybe people will start shouting "YO, WHERE ARE MY NERDS" at you in the street. 161
Reposted by Ray ValleseAlice Lastname @wortron.bsky.social · 08/02/2026have you ever noticed that kermit the frog is in the black lodge 7294
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 23/01/2026Oops -- I need to go into my Bluesky settings and toggle off the cognitive dissonance. 051
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 20/01/2026It's getting harder and harder to tell Trump's letters from the letters of Lazlo Toth*, great American. * Don Novello, aka Father Guido Sarducci. 020
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 16/01/2026Editing. The author said that the mighty Thor, god of thunder, is especially formidable because he can also summon lighting. Big deal. I can do that too. 020
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 13/01/2026When I edit punctuation in manuscripts, I remove commas from writers who have too many and give them to writers who need more. Yes, I am a Comma-unist. 181
Reposted by Ray ValleseLaura E. Hall @lauraehall.bsky.social · 18/12/2025Stay safe out there y'all 1856771648
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 13/12/2025Idea for a new detective series: Hercules Poirot. He solves mysteries by performing feats of strength. What are some of his books/movies? Examples: Pulling the Orient Express The Jacked Man Guns Out The Bench-Pressing of the Lambs 030
Reposted by Ray ValleseAdam Serwer @adamserwer.bsky.social · 17/11/2025Editors have a really hard job, and the good ones can make something unreadable readable, and the great ones can make something unreadable into something good. But they're basically invisible, until someone tries to write without one. 723463510
Reposted by Ray ValleseKevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 12/11/2025The Speaker of the House shut the chamber down for two months to block the release of the Epstein Files and the president is huddled in the Situation Room of the White House to formulate a plan to keep them from being released, and I don't know why you crazy libs think there's some kind of cover up. 10186102008
Reposted by Ray ValleseDan Diamond @ddiamond.bsky.social · 08/11/2025sometimes an Oxford comma can make all the difference 16979011193
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 23/10/2025At first I thought the @merriam-webster.com site was having a stroke. 020
Reposted by Ray ValleseStan! @stannex.bsky.social · 23/10/2025Thanks for the inspiration @rayvallese.bsky.social I really should dig up all my Typos of Doom and put them into an ebook or something. 151
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 22/10/2025Editing. The author wrote that the character had a rough childhood because he grew upon the streets. Apparently the character is a weed, or maybe mold. Yeah, I'd say that's a rough life. 030
Ray Vallese @rayvallese.bsky.social · 12/10/2025In honor of spooky month, share a four-word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand. He did a dawizard. 0113
