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josh

@purplelemons.dev
232 followers 155 following 992 posts

21M | he/they | audhd 📍 Texas, US eco Marxist Leninist, cybersecurity grad, amateur full-stack dev

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josh @purplelemons.dev · 28/09/2026
i feel like i'd do really well with diplomatic immunity
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 25/09/2026
jokes is like jazz: you hit all the wrong notes on purpose and watch the audience for projectiles
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 24/09/2026
and by "objective" i mean "relative to humans on earth"
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 19/09/2026
this may have been too high-concept
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 18/09/2026
kid named nominative determinism
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 18/09/2026
ironically, daily dose of internet clips of people getting injured are the only clips that include "Nobody was hurt" on the bottom right of the screen
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 17/09/2026
goddamn, kevin warsh aint nobody's bitch. also hes got w rizz
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 17/09/2026
wow, cologne is an effective tear gas
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 16/09/2026
in the end, new age medicine was right: some rocks really do have a magical aura. it's ionizing radiation
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 16/09/2026
my extreme preparedness is often mistaken for clairvoyance
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 06/09/2026
double jeopardy, they walk free
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Reposted by josh
ceej @ceej.online · 05/09/2026
so I’m “under arrest.” interesting. perhaps you didn’t realize I’m one of bluesky’s 38 most influential posters
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 06/09/2026
i hate when people call me cold-blooded because, if you know me at all, basking in the sun to warm could kill me in a matter of minutes
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 05/09/2026
was the ABCs song supposed to rhyme???
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 04/09/2026
wb
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 29/08/2026
*another nickel clinks in the jar* "did you say 'uppest-stairs' when you meant 'on the roof' again?" "... yes"
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 29/08/2026
"uh hi, rich people bank? yes, i was calling to order a new checkbook with extra space for more zeros"
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 28/08/2026
what if everyone decided to stop using social media
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Reposted by josh
ceej @ceej.online · 27/08/2026
not stoked on the idea of my child becoming tiktok famous at sixteen wearing a stupid fake mustache and doing an impression of me being vulnerable about the pandemic
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 27/08/2026
mad props to all the grifters who made their money the hard way instead of crypto rugpulls
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 23/08/2026
humans have always enjoyed dick measuring, even if it's to the point of self-sabotage
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 22/08/2026
why don't our bladders need to fart?
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 21/08/2026
I LOVE PAY DAY
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 20/08/2026
marty mcfly and doc brown christmas special: back to the north pole
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 19/08/2026
i learned a new word a few days ago but i alreadu frogot it
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 17/08/2026
magenta is merely a pigment of your imagination
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 12/08/2026
there is a fine line between nostalgia and feeling unc
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 09/08/2026
the universe might be a 4 dimensional brick
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 07/08/2026
wait hold on spacex is doing a nortel. they got nasdaq to lower the maturity period to 15 days so that everyone's 401ks would buy it. history is literally repeating itself.
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 05/08/2026
i have a bad feeling about this next election
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Reposted by josh
ceej @ceej.online · 02/08/2026
where are those minimalist guys at now, anyway? did they evaporate
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 02/08/2026
every time someone trolls me with the "manual breathing" or "manual blinking" thing, im just thankful that doesn't happen with heartbeat
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 25/07/2026
i love the lightning, but thunder scares the shit out of me
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 23/07/2026
it's sad that the internet has been commercialized to such a high degree. it used to be that you heard about a weird website from a friend, not media algorithmically fed to you. nowadays, tom scott couldnt pull off the things that he did 20 years ago
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 22/07/2026
i believe in the multiverse, but where my timeline branches when the weather person on TV says a percent chance of something happening
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 21/07/2026
GooberEats is when you text ur friends one by one if they have mac n cheese and if they do can they please bring it over
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 19/07/2026
electric tennis racquet so that i can vaporize my enemies at 3 million watts
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 19/07/2026
if i was a headache, would you still love me?
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 16/07/2026
help i googled "echo vs reverb" and i still cant understand the difference
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 15/07/2026
bingbongs & bendys
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 11/07/2026
curiosity, didnt kill the cat. lil bro just gets an existential crisis every now and then
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 11/07/2026
germs are naked to the invisible eye
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 08/07/2026
do u have 20/20 hearing?
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 07/07/2026
the period of time between me learning about a new meme and that meme dying is getting smaller and smaller. i fear memes will eventually start dying before i even hear about them
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 04/07/2026
AAAAGH WHY DOES MASS ONLY SEEM TO BE LINKED TO THE ELECTROMAGNETIC SPECTRUM VIA GENERAL RELATIVITY
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 04/07/2026
overclocking my high-dpi scanner into a laser printer
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 04/07/2026
Leonardo da Vinci resolve studio 21.0.2
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 03/07/2026
"yesterday" and "tomorrow" confuse me so much because they always change the next day
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josh @purplelemons.dev · 01/07/2026
i said "put the jar in the container" in VC (when talking about a modded Minecraft server running in Docker) and everyone laughed at me like i was a crazy person
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