David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 4hYou'd think the history of medieval clowning is the one area fantasy authors would be interested in exploring, given how many of them are clowns themselves, but nope – just a solid wall of this guy: 0787
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 4hOne of my favourite recurring examples of "generically medieval" fantasy's tendency to jump directly from Antiquity to the Early Modern era and skip the actual medieval period entirely is the ubiquity of a VERY SPECIFICALLY 16th C image of the court jester. Jingling fucks as far as the eye can see. 28710
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 14hGoing through the replies on my recent posts and deleting all the comments from people with shit reading comprehension is genuinely therapeutic for me. 1912
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 15hNES-style metroidvania with modern QoL features like customisable map pins, except for the sake of authenticity it gives you a "password" that's really a base-64 encoding of the game state that you have to write down rather than save files, so the more map pins you place the longer your password is. 07515
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 15hIndie video game self-descriptions banging on about dopamine is the TRY NOT TO CUM of farming sims. 07514
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 16hI understand some folks would prefer that each area have a punchier central hook rather than spending ages hypnotically wandering through a bunch of subtle variations, but it's not really a FLAW that the OST of the Castlevania game that's set in Paris takes its cues from French techno. 1490
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 16hI really love what "Belmont's Curse" demo is doing with the music. The track for the Paris Streets hub area is like fifteen minutes long and explores nearly as many variations. I hope every single track in the full game is like that. 3583
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 17hMost humans don't really get gnomish free use kink because they still won't let you hit it unless you solve their riddles three, but, like, they're really easy riddles. 48312
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 18h(Doubly so if the person being so replied to has she/her pronouns in her bio because this is also a common behaviour of men speaking to women in all mediums ever.) 2861
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 18hIt's hard to tell who's a bot and who's not because comments that repeat your own post back to you phrased like they're introducing new information is a common bot behaviour, but it's also a common behaviour of real humans who didn't bother to read the post they're replying to. 71347
Reposted by David J ProkopetzLisandra brave @lisandrabrave.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Even if it is the butt of the joke? 1202
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026 It thinks posterior-related puns are hilarious. 2773
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Weird dragons #137: The Long Wyrm. It's about a metre thick and longer than you can imagine. Maybe not INFINITELY long, because it's not omnipresent, but if you follow the length of its body you'll just keep finding more dragon. Its front end can show up anywhere, but nobody has ever seen the back. 714819
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026I know it's unlikely such a major writing decision was made in response to fandom discourse, but the fact that Noelle will straight up murder-suicide Kris if you try to back out of the Weird Route in Chapter 5 feels like a pointed commentary on certain characterisations of their relationship. 0652
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026"But the aerial controls will make the platforming too easy, Castlevana is supposed to be about falling into pits and dying", they say, as the trailers show us Rose doing precision platforming bullshit that looks like something out of a Celeste B-side. 31136
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026I agree that "Belmont's Curse" feels like it's going to have a different focus from past Castlevania games based on the demo, but seeing some of the negative reactions gets me a little bit. Oh no, a Castlevania that has a clear vision of what its platforming is about. Is your burger too juicy, too? 320321
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026There's a secret 2nd Earth on the far side of the Sun where all the stuff folks who believe in the Mandela Effect have misremembered is actually true, but oddly, no Mandela Effect truthers are from there. That their faulty memory exactly matches Counter-Earth's reality is just a weird coincidence. 19014
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026The current explanatory preamble to this table, for the curious: 0172
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Looking at it in the morning with fresh eyes, I might swap "Something has gone awry, with evidence of sabotage" with "Evidence of sabotage to some critical process is found". Sharpen it up a bit and avoid burying the lede! 1302
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026And the entry that's missing from the ALT text, since Bluesky's ALT text character limit stubbornly remains exactly one line too short to accommodate a full page of text: 66 The God-eaters are mistaken for someone else. 1342
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026I swear this was the single most challenging table to write in the whole book. Thirty-six location-neutral random events where every entry is pick-two-and-combine compatible with every other in at least potentially interesting ways AND they all have to fit on one line apiece? What Fun We Have Had. 311213
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026If I wasn't already busy with crowdfunding fulfillment for a different project I would 100% be writing an OSR game with a bunch of big stupid d66 tables exploring this premise as we speak. 2591
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026(Also a decent one to look up if you've caught that knight-and-prince[ss] kink that's been going around lately, since "every player takes on the roles of multiple characters, including their titular Prince [gender neutral] and at least one telepathically bonded Knight" is a core conceit.) 0211
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Getting Tiffany Problemed in my Ancient Greek themed adventure because I accurately depicted the columns as being stabilised with iron dowels, but my players saw metal rods sticking out of the broken marble and interpreted it as evidence that they were fake ruins built by aliens. 215217
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026That's what prompted this remark, yes, but I'm aware of the practice from prior personal experience – I work in enterprise web development. 190
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026It's not nearly so PvP-focused as "Dallas" is (ironically, given its premise!), but that's probably a necessary concession to long-term group playability when so many of the available conflict resolution options are terminal. 1361
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026As an aside, if your interest was piqued by that thread about the licensed "Dallas" RPG, but you'd prefer killing people with knives to be better supported, a modern game that's playing in approximately the same ballpark is "The Devil City & its 77 Vicious Princes": dukerino.itch.io/vicious-prin...dukerino.itch.ioThe Devil City & its 77 Vicious Princes by Dukerino 16014
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Well, yes, but we also treat people like they're being ridiculous if they act like a piece of media has failed to make good on a promised straight romance *just because* two hot people of opposite genders stood next to each other, so let's at least be even-handed here. 0271
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Queerbaiting is of course a real and present problem in popular media, but every so often you've gotta take a step back and seriously ask "okay, am I being queerbaited here, or is this just two hot people of the same gender standing next to each other?" 317434
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Redoing D&D's playable species so that instead of having "races" you just pick a standard monster type (Construct, Elemental, Fey, Humanoid, Undead, etc.) and roll or choose from a list of type-appropriate features. Owing to how the type feature tables are laid out, orcs are now plants. 1117826
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026We're in here quibbling about community standards regarding the #nsfw tag while major online advertising networks are out there defining all depictions of fat people regardless of context as "adult content" because their clients don't want their products displayed next to a fat person. 2248117
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026In spite of being a game published in 1980 by a company best known for tabletop war games, an accurate retroclone of "Dallas: The Television Role-Playing Game" would probably read more like some sort of post-Forge thing than anything we'd conventionally think of as "old school". 01198
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026For the unfamiliar, the joke here is the "Dallas" RPG was decades ahead of its time in many respects, including making players responsible for playing allied NPCs, session scripting, rudimentary "social combat", and a genuinely fascinating approach to baking gender roles into the framework of play. 41298
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026My cat just started doing very insistent "come with me" calls, led me all the way across the house *to fetch the other cat*, then led both of us back to their food bowls because apparently she didn't want to eat alone. 644839
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026This isn't hypothetical. I've literally met the guy I'm describing. I've met *multiple unconnected instances* of the guy I'm describing. 41934
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026For the uninitiated, imagine a guy who agrees to join a game about teenage goths in present-day suburbia, immediately flips their shit when informed their character must also be a teenage goth from present-day suburbia, then when you find out what they ACTUALLY want to play, it's a half-elf druid. 41947
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Guy who's like "I can't play scenarios with pregens, I can't play systems that impose restrictions on my creative freedom, if you don't let me play literally any character I want you're gatekeeping me", then the product of that unfettered freedom is always a rigorously core-book-legal D&D character. 1129443
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 03/10/2026While some purists restrict the "OSR" label to games emulating OD&D and/or Mentzer Basic, others consider anything from the hobby's first decade fair game; thus, having first been published only six years after OD&D, under the broader definition you could technically write an OSR game based on this: 2332094
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 03/10/2026As modes of locomotion, "scurry", "skitter", "scutter" and "scuttle" all describe essentially identical activities, but they connote very different things about the creature so acting. I cannot articulate what that difference is, but I'll know at a glance whether a writer has picked the wrong one. 817751
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 03/10/2026If you're only familiar with the franchise via its surviving legacy of holiday specials and Snoopy merch, it may not be apparent to you how many strips were just Charlie Brown saying something that would get an adult red-flagged for potential suicidal ideation, and, like, that was the joke. 886175
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 03/10/2026"Did OD&D involve a lot of underwater combat" if the assumption you're operating on is that the page count devoted to a particular activity had any relationship whatsoever with the frequency with which that activity was expected to be encountered in play, I'm afraid you don't understand OD&D at all. 610612
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 03/10/2026In spite of being of the correct generation to have grown up while "Peanuts" was still in active publication, it's always a little surreal to be reminded that the most popular comic strip in the English-speaking world for fifty solid years was about an eight-year-old with clinical depression. 191426208
Reposted by David J Prokopetz🎃Farmer GaddAAAHH!!!!🎃 @farmergadda.bsky.social · 03/10/2026Anyone claiming their osr houserules are the one true way are liars and charlatans UNLESS they dedicate a full page to being really autistic about polearms for no good reason, then they can talk. 411017
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 03/10/2026A lot of OSR dungeon crawlers claim to be the true heirs to OD&D, but you can tell they're posers because not one of them has an entire chapter inexplicably devoted to underwater combat. 615719
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Having finally seen "Coyote vs. Acme", I'm wondering how finished it really was when it got canned. In some scenes the CGI is a near-perfect emulation of the old 2D style, and in others it reads more like a video game cutscene, and there's not a lot of rhyme or reason to which scenes those are. 0982
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Y'all, it... it wasn't supposed to be a death game. Nobody told you to do *any* of that. You were supposed to go on a magical adventure and learn a lesson about setting aside your differences to overcome adversity. Where did you get the guns? HOW did you get the guns? 622852
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Putting your philosophy degree to good use consulting for web fiction authors by writing in-character monologues explaining why the lead's actions were actually 100% ethically correct, like the people who fill in the [technobabble goes here] spots writers leave in "Star Trek" scripts. 18210
David J Prokopetz @prokopetz.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Wrong era of aviation entirely – they're not interchangeable. 110