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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️

@pferdhosen.bsky.social
553 followers 399 following 1.6K posts

Misplaced Bostonian living in Providence, RI ⚓️ Joined November ‘24 and you know what that means.

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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 1h
I can’t even describe how good it feels to learn that your perp is dead and can never hurt you or anyone else again. I wish his victims a day full of joy, catharsis, and some of the boyhood Hastert stole from them
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 3h
I was a neurotic and fearful child. The Viacom V at the end of my grandfather’s Programs was enough to do me in
youtu.be
Viacom V of Doom
YouTube video by Ethan Lopez
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Thought Slime’s monster @slimemildred.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I don’t want to sound glib, but if a woman actually wanted to “make up a crime to ruin a man’s reputation,” they’d pick one that people actually give a shit about, like hurting a dog or something.
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
People who hate Indians uniformly hate Jews as well, and for the same reasons.
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Ira Weinschel @iraweinschel.com · 02/10/2026
Getting rid of free chips and salsa is legit the fastest route to Blexas
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depths of wikipedia @depthsofwikipedia.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
d
Who, Me? was a top secret, sulfurous, non-lethal chemical weapon developed by MIT-graduate Ernest Crocker for the U.S. Office of Strategic Services during World War II.[1][2] Who, Me? smelled strongly of fecal matter, and was issued in pocket atomizers intended to be unobtrusively sprayed on a German officer to humiliate him and, by extension, demoralize the occupying German forces.[3]

Who, Me? had a high concentration of extremely volatile sulfur compounds that were very difficult to control: more often than not, the person who did the spraying also ended up smelling as bad as the one targeted.[4] After two weeks, it was concluded that Who, Me? was a failure.
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
When they tell you that fighting back will just make him mad, they are lying to you. A big, strong man is as vulnerable to a life-altering head injury as you are
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Rebecca Solnit @rebeccasolnit.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Time for this classic again.
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Someone needlepoint this on a pillow for me
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I feel like they just discovered four more colors no one has ever seen before Pure glee
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Good morning, Storrowing fans
A truck stuck under a bridge
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Soup season is upon us
Bumper sticker that reads “do not hit me I’m transporting soup in open containers. The background is dark yellow and there’s a hearty bowl of minestrone next to the text
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the Mountain Goats @themountaingoats.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
youtu.be/mxtfdH3-TQ4
youtu.be
Desmond Dekker & The Aces - "Israelites" (Official Audio)
YouTube video by Trojan Records Official
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the Mountain Goats @themountaingoats.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Jackie Jackson died two days ago. His death did not get the fanfare that the big celebrities get but I assure you he was no less than any of them: a titan astride the earth. In this thread, a few of the songs he played bass on. You know these songs. You know their bass parts. youtu.be/DKVB_CtU8XQ
youtu.be
Pressure Drop
YouTube video by Toots & The Maytals - Topic
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I will never stop calling this guy Massachusett‘s national treasure
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
My psychoatrist told me that I was one of her favorite patients today. I feel like I’ve achieved the neurotic people pleasers’ highest honor
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JP @jpbrammer.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
it's important to arrive at sturdy ethical principles that you can't be annoyed out of. people are annoying as shit
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
We should have known this country was cooked when we refused to convert to the metric system because it was “too french”
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Philip Eil @phileil.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
New Rhode Island library achievement unlocked: The library where I spoke last night, in Little Compton, had fishing poles available to borrow.
A photo from inside the Brownell Library in Little Compton, RI.

Tackle boxes sit on the floor. A number of fishing polls are held up by a rack on the wall. A nearby poster reads "COMMON FRESHWATER FISH OF RHODE ISLAND."
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Paperback Paradise @paperbackparadise.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Photo of a book cover featuring another photo of a real cockatiel. Title and author read:

Introduction to Screaming
By Dr Coqatielius Boidmin
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Katie Hodges-Kluck, PhD @klhkhistorian.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
**Lights Out Alert Sunday & Monday Nights** Birdcast is estimating 300-400 million birds will be in flight.
From meteorologist Eric Snitil

**Lights Out Alert Sunday & Monday Nights**

"Heads up birders, I would not be surprised if the biggest bird migration night of the year happens over the next 2 nights. Birdcast is estimating 300-400 million birds will be in flight. That is a lot, but the pattern could not be better for migratory birds. A massive area of high pressure will turn the low level winds from the northeast to the southwest across most of the US. The last time we had anything similar to this in the fall was early October last year when a record 1.25 billion birds were in flight. I doubt we get to that level, but I suspect the number will top 500 million especially Monday night which looks to be the bigger of the two nights. You can help by turning off those outdoor lights on big migration nights, and the next 2 nights is about as big as it gets."
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
That’s like $200 worth of taxpayer money per toilet roll
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Texas friends:
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Providence’s mayoral campaign was a race between the left wing of the Democratic party and pro-business centrism. The centrist got 🎶trounced🎶 🎶tonight🎶
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Voting for Rhode Island governor was like eating dinner at Opa: disgusting, no good choices, not in my best interest or anyone else’s
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
You have to kiss a lot of toads to find your frog
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
They made a special police that shoots you on sight if you’re melting down in a stressful situation or just have weird vibes
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
In a culture that treats cars as sexual objects, it makes perfect sense that people who experience car violence are treated like rape survivors. What was she wearing? It was her fault for being present in a space where bad people were acting dangerously.
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
We need an army of Matt Shearers out here. Making accessible, engaging videos about how every person has value and showing people how to look for the weird, joyful or interesting parts of a new place instead of acting like a suburban cop freaking out on the Green Line to BC
tiktok.com
Checking in on North Shore Royalty. . #RockportMA #GloucesterMA #NorthShoreMA #Massachusetts #Boston Ipswich Essex Newburyport Manchester By the Sea Salem Beverly
TikTok video by WBZ NewsRadio
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The Onion @theonion.com · 03/09/2026
Google Maps Introduces Crawling Directions For Cyclists Hit By Truck theonion.com/google-maps-introduces…
Google Maps Introduces Crawling Directions For Cyclists Hit By Truck
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
A complete list of Massachusetts towns who voted for Seth Moulton
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
If you know it’s time for the percolator, it’s time for your mammogram
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
For 50 points, tell me which MBTA commuter rail station features an extensive fairy garden?
A stone wall topped by a village of colorful toys
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Sit me in front of this video like a toddler and I’ll stay quiet for hours
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Ira Weinschel @iraweinschel.com · 25/08/2026
Epic handshake meme showing that everyone loved Dolly Parton
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Philip Eil @phileil.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
"It's going to end up with someone dying here. It is urgent, please. They are treating everyone with brutal force." - message from a community member detained at the Wyatt Detention Facility, in Central Falls, R.I. From Alliance to Mobilize Our Resistance (AMOR)'s new report. Read it in full here:
drive.google.com
AMOR August 2026 Report on the Wyatt.pdf
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Rebecca Solnit @rebeccasolnit.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
One thing I remember and hardly anyone seems to is that there's a sort of sexual revolution interregnum when all sex was good (seen from the adult male perspective, which it mostly was) including sex with children, which was publicly defended. Feminism, mostly, is what changed that.
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Me, having spent my entire life chained in a cave: nice

@777jorgeivan
I asked this chick for a sexy pic and she sent this shit

(picture of a woman's shadow cast on a wall, with anatomically positioned bra and panties)
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Jessica David @jdinri.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Live in the RI suburbs and want to bring your neighbors together? We've got a micro grant for that! Introducing the Pizza Strip Fund, up to $150 for that driveway hang or patio potluck.
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Gradon @gradontripp.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Ready for a RIDOT ad that shouts "See! It's not just Rhode Island!"
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
The year is 2117. In a world where AI has progressively deskilled four generations of Americans, only Montessori and Walden School kids are left to carry the flame of civilization.
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
The worst and most prolific bully at our school (from kindergarten through 10th grade) moved to Florida and immediately got shot in the head by the first girl she tried to torment at her new school
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
My birthday is only a few hundred days away if someone has $800 to drop
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Chat Pile @chatpileband.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Heyyy my boyfriend and I saw you from across the bar and we like your vibe
Two intertwined carrots and an eggplant
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Martha Wells @marthawells.com · 05/08/2026
Because it apparently needs to be said: I have never fucking used the AI/LLM/chatbot/plagiarism machine and I never fucking will. If you use it, I think you're a bad person.
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Luke Knox @lukeknox.me · 04/08/2026
in the Québécois version of King of the Hill (“Henri pis sa gang”), Boomhauer is named Papineau and sounds like this
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Pitchfork Surprise! ☠️ @pferdhosen.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Gen AI is attractive because our analog information environment has collapsed. Your parents used to be able to call a reference librarian or even a college professor. They had time to visit the library. They subscribed to popular magazines that made academic topics accessible to everyone. Kinda bad!
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