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Journey of a Survivor

@persevere-after.bsky.social
299 followers 169 following 327 posts

Survivor of longterm spousal abuse who’s learning to recognize & reject abusive patterns, becoming stronger, more independent, & impossible to control!

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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Abusers may use suicide threats as a tool of control to prevent their partner leaving them, coerce them into returning, or force their compliance. It is a form of emotional abuse and manipulation. #CoerciveControl shadowsofcontrol.com/in-the...
shadowsofcontrol.com
Suicide Threats as a Weapon of Coercive Control
Understanding suicide threats as a form of coercive control in abusive relationships. Learn about the challenges faced by police in balancing mental health and victim safety.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
What’s really embarrassing is that I’ve been out 3 yrs, and I only just now realized that it WOULDN’T be my fault if something bad happened. He’s responsible for his own actions, not me. People have told me this many times and I’ve reminded myself of the same, but today I actually believe it. ❤️‍🩹 🌱
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
🚨 I should’ve called the police.🚨 I knew the police could be there for me if I really needed help, but I really thought I was handling things well and that I was ok. Sure, I slept in my car out front of the police station several times because I was afraid of my husband, but yeah, I was “ok”.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
🚨 I should’ve called the police!!🚨 Why didn’t I? I was afraid of the consequences: People would find out. He might lose his job. This could be the final straw to send him over the edge. And, if I called and then something bad happened, it would be MY fault!! He told me so…and I believed him. 🤦‍♀️
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Happy domestic violence awareness month! We are survivors-even on the days when it feels like that’s all we’re doing!! 💪 ❤️‍🩹 🫂 ✌️
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I’m separated, so not single & not looking, but I wonder sometimes about men I see & what sort of partner they’d make. When I married my abuser, he was the classic “nice guy”. He had “nice guy” qualities. So now, when I see men who seem thoughtful or kind, I think to myself, “Is he an abuser too?” 🤔
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I found out today that abusers have different motivations. Some are sadistic and enjoy hurting people. Others view themselves superior and entitlement plays a big role. The last type is the one who abuses as a survival mechanism because of a fear of abandonment. That describes my abuser perfectly. 😱
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Parental alienation. Zero stars. Do not recommend.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Loneliness must be cumulative. I’ve never felt this alone. I’ve started dreaming about hugs. My kids give obligatory ones, but only if I ask. I get polite greeting hugs from ladies at church, but I need a real, “I’ve got you”, “you’re safe here”, “stay as long as you need”, breathe it all out, HUG.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
I just want to be somebody’s somebody instead of nobody’s somebody.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I get so lonely & long for physical touch. It’s not constant, but today has been hard. I cried to God about my situation-literal tears. Then I read my daily devo: Isaiah 41:13: “For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand.” And Matt 28:20 “I am with you always, even unto the end of the earth.” 🥰
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
The person that screwed up the relationship doesn’t get to dictate what forgiveness looks like.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
I have forgiven my abuser, but still have boundaries. He doubts my forgiveness & claims if it was true, then I’d now trust & accept his spiritual advice/correction. He likes to pick me apart & point out my flaws. After 20+ yrs of his criticisms, I’m already very aware that I’m nowhere near perfect.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
I do this.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Beware of passive aggressive comments.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
My verse of the day: “All that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution.” 2 Timothy 3:12
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Sabotage is a common tactic of control. Abusers often time their cruelty to damage your confidence, career, and independence. #CoerciveControl #EmotionalAbuse
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Even when it feels like it, you are never truly alone! God is right here with us! He’s our rock! He’s our safe place!! He’s trustworthy!! He has a plan & His plan is BEST!! We are safe with Him & safety is everything, so draw close to Him & He will draw close to you! 🥰 www.bible.com/en/videos/54...
bible.com
Psalm 18:2 - Bible App
Psalm 18:2 with Sidhara Udalagama
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
If you’re a recently divorced dude shaking the hand of a similarly aged woman who is separated from her husband, for goodness sake plz don’t keep hold of her hand while you try to start a conversation. Read the room. If she’s into you, MAYBE it could work?? but if not…you just earned creep status.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
The belief that a partner or child can be owned is central to abuse. It explains the constant control, the seething jealousy, the silencing of individuality, and the violent rage when ownership is threatened. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...
shadowsofcontrol.com
“You Belong to Me” Uncovering the Ownership Belief at the Heart of Abuse
Delve into the dynamics of abuse and ownership. Discover how the idea of possession influences abusive behavior and relationships.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Words Finally Spoken @wordsfinallyspoken.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Quote below from Tarang Chawla (IG) From an article he wrote about his sister's murder.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
[Sic] Burns @sicburns2.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Cheer up guys raw cookie dough is now at least as safe as most fresh produce
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Anyone read “How he gets into her head” by D Hennessy? The Amazon description says: “He suggests that male intimate abuse & violence are driven by an entitlement to sexual priority & that the other tactics of control & violence are motivated by this entitlement.” Seems consistent with my experience.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
I’m healing. I’ve made a lot of progress, but I’ve lost my kids. They believe my abusers lies and sympathize with him and blame me just like he does. It’s excruciating.
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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Abusers are increasingly misusing therapy language to control, confuse, and discredit their partners. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...
shadowsofcontrol.com
The Abuser in Therapy: When Psychological Terms Become Tools of Control
Uncover the impact of therapy language abuse on survivors. Learn how terminology can be weaponized to maintain power.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Constant surveillance and accusations are warning signs of coercive control. #ControllingBehavior #CoerciveControl
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Gretchen Baskerville-The Life-Saving Divorce @lifesavingdivorce.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
SAHMs: Have you ever thought, “I can’t leave. I haven’t worked in years. How would I possibly support myself?” Being a stay-at-home mom does NOT mean you have “no skills.” You may have far more marketable experience than you realize. 👉 Read my latest post: buff.ly/SuQu2hr #StayAtHomeMom #SAHM
lifesavingdivorce.com
How to Make Money After Divorce When You’ve Been a Stay-at-Home Mom | Life-Saving Divorce
Practical ideas for stay-at-home moms rebuilding income, skills, and financial stability.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Gretchen Baskerville-The Life-Saving Divorce @lifesavingdivorce.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
We were taught to fear divorce instead of fear abuse. Research points to the real driver of long-term trauma: abuse and household dysfunction—not the split itself. In high-distress homes, kids suffer 10x more damage when parents stay together (Amato, 2003). buff.ly/TLRytnt #LifeSavingDivorce
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
If your partner consistently mocks, makes sarcastic comments, or 'jokingly' criticizes your appearance, intelligence, or personality, it’s not a joke—it’s emotional abuse.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
John Paul @johnpaulhi.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
Librarians literally saved my life
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Gretchen Baskerville-The Life-Saving Divorce @lifesavingdivorce.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
We were taught to love, love, love. And forgive, forgive, forgive. But the Bible also says to get away and stay from abusers. Those verses exist. We just weren't shown them. buff.ly/W6yshyD #lifesavingdivorce #domesticabuseawareness #biblicalmarriage
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DomesticShelters.org @domesticshelters.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
Survivors don’t always look like you expect—meet Gus, a gruff 62-year-old trucker. 🚚 His BTS tattoo says “break the silence”—who needs to hear this today? 🔗 zpr.io/dfAfdNhquLvh #MenSpeakOut
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
DomesticShelters.org @domesticshelters.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
No bruises, but you feel trapped? 😔 Coercive control is a pattern of isolation and micromanagement—have you seen it? 🔗 zpr.io/uXyiLmn2Mwy2 #CoerciveControl
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Dr. K @katekaynak.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
MacTraff @mactraff.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
Sensitive Reminder: We all know someone....that someone could be "YOU" or "ME". Be Trauma Informed.... Believe Survivors. 💙
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DomesticShelters.org @domesticshelters.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
Leaving is the most dangerous moment—go as far as you need to feel safe. Plan support, legal help, and safer costs ahead; what would you prioritize first? 🔗 zpr.io/Fn4MMkBhJe4A #LeaveToLive
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Gretchen Baskerville-The Life-Saving Divorce @lifesavingdivorce.bsky.social · 27/03/2026
1 in 4 highly religious marriages report abuse. This isn't secular infiltration. It's in our churches. The question isn't whether abuse exists among believers — it's whether we'll protect the vulnerable. 🙏 Read about the research here: buff.ly/Rihnvds #lifesavingdivorce
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 13/03/2026
I was also afraid to tell them because I didn’t want my friends & family to think badly of my husband. I thought this was a phase that we’d get through & he would change & be safe for me. I didn’t want my family to hate him because of what he had done to me in the “past”. Update: He never changed.
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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 05/02/2026
Special occasions are just another opportunity for an abuser to stir up drama and overshadow your happiness. 🚩
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 20/01/2026
I hate my abuser
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 01/01/2026
It’s important to visit the past to spend time reflecting on what has been-even the really hard stuff. It helps us identify patterns, see growth, and recognize ways God protected us through each trial. It’s healthy to visit, but don’t stay too long. Keep on, friend! ❤️‍🩹 www.youtube.com/watch?v=iX-F...
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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 21/12/2025
The belief that a partner or child can be owned is central to abuse. It explains the constant control, the seething jealousy, the silencing of individuality, and the violent rage when ownership is threatened. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...
shadowsofcontrol.com
“You Belong to Me” Uncovering the Ownership Belief at the Heart of Abuse
Delve into the dynamics of abuse and ownership. Discover how the idea of possession influences abusive behavior and relationships.
052
Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 20/12/2025
Love is meant to be a sanctuary of safety, respect, and support not a battlefield of control, fear and manipulation.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 12/12/2025
Saying “it takes two” in abuse shifts blame onto the victim and lets the abuser off the hook. Abuse isn’t a relationship problem — it’s one person choosing to harm and control another. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...
shadowsofcontrol.com
Why “It Takes Two” Is a Misleading Idea About Domestic Abuse
Explore the truth behind the 'it takes two abuse myth' and understand the real dynamics of domestic abuse.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 11/12/2025
Triggered today. Early txt with $ manipulation. Add a 3rd party encouraging more positive interactions with my abuser, add talk of holiday plans, add 3rd party sent what 99% of world would call a heartwarming video but all I saw was lies & danger. I was quickly over my daily threshold of ick.
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 08/12/2025
I hate it when someone asks if I’m ok just out of the blue. I know I should be grateful that they noticed me and had enough concern to ask, but afterwards I always overthink it-like “dang I must’ve looked really rough today”. It wasn’t even an especially hard day, just regular hard.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 07/12/2025
Abusers are increasingly misusing therapy language to control, confuse, and discredit their partners. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...
shadowsofcontrol.com
The Abuser in Therapy: When Psychological Terms Become Tools of Control
Uncover the impact of therapy language abuse on survivors. Learn how terminology can be weaponized to maintain power.
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Reposted by Journey of a Survivor
Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 07/12/2025
Denial protects the abuser. It’s often easier for outsiders to doubt a survivor than face the horror that someone they know could be dangerous. #BelieveSurvivors #DomesticAbuseAwareness
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 06/12/2025
I love love LOVE how the Lord so often encourages me with just the right verse at just the right time!! The Bible app is an excellent resource for daily reading, study & prayer. Sharing today’s devotional incase you need a little reminder of God’s love!! ✌️❤️‍🩹 www.bible.com/en/videos/51...
bible.com
Psalm 34:18
Psalm 34:18 with Alpha
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Journey of a Survivor @persevere-after.bsky.social · 06/12/2025
Struggling tonight. Leaning on the Lord and thanking Him that He is right here with me ❤️
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