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PaxtonPullman

@paxtonpullman.bsky.social
968 followers 1.9K following 4.2K posts

Midwestern dad. Ska and Pro Wrestling are the only legitimate forms of art. Black bean burritos. My pets. He/him.

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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 8h
Sen Eric Schmitt: We have evidence that Paxtonpullman has been making references to pop culture from this decade. Me: Senator, look at my skeets, you'll find *nothing* but ska puns and a hollow, detached irony of saying "MY WIFE , YEAH BABY YEAH, and I HAVE NIPPLES GREG CAN YOU MILK ME?"
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 8h
static.klipy.com
Walter Matthau's Funny Smile in Dennis The Menace
Alt: Walter Matthau's Funny Smile in Dennis The Menace
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This number Slevin is lucky
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Sheetz coming to my neighborhood hot on the heels of a Wawa two miles away. We're in gas station hoagie heaven up on the far northside of Indy.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This Choosin' Texas is heard
Zelda Rubenstein in Poltergeist
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Ska and Pro wrestling
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I have crimes, Grindelwald, can you milk me?
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
SHE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE!
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
What!?!?!?!?
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
That this entertainment industry I love so much has brought so much early death and tragedy is incredibly hard to reconcile. I cannot wrap my head around it.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I really enjoyed this book. It gets intense at the end!
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Signed up for LinkedIn Premium. I'd feel less dirty signing up for a Wikifeet account.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I don't show my name or face on here but just know that it means a lot how everyone is talking about my hit song Choosing Texas.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Not all of the fifty states are nifty. It's okay, I can say this because I live in Indiana.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Artie, the strongest maaaaaan... in the wooooooorld.
Milo Aukerman, a white nerd in black glasses. The joke is that he looks like the character Artie from the 90s kid show The Adventures of Pete and Pete.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I'm ready for 3 and half hours of non-stop @dcpierson.bsky.social 's Apple Store guy action.
Actor/comedian DC Pierson, a guy with long hair, bushy beard, and an Apple uniform standing in front of Captain America and Black Widow.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I've got lederhosen in different area codesen.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
HELL FUCKIN' YEAH
A large brown dog looks at the camera and a multicolored cat naps next to the dog
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I can't believe the New York Times ranked this as #17 of the century's best TV shows.
DVD cover of OJ Simpson's prank show Juiced with Simpson in various disguises
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Band that does M*A*S*H-themed parodies of Blink 182 songs called Alda Small Things
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
repost with an image of your favorite James Bond (wrong answers only)
static.klipy.com
Artie, the Strongest Man, Pole Vaults in Pete & Pete
Alt: Artie, the Strongest Man, wearing red and blue tights, holds himself up on a football goalpost
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
A-E-, and I'll say it louder for the folks in the back, W.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
#skaandprowrestlingaretheonlylegitimateformsofart #aewdynamite 🤼‍♂️
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Insane that one of the most powerful men in the country is a dude who calls himself Coach Tommy.
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Reposted by PaxtonPullman
rebar mcentire? @rebarmcentire.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
can I bellow all the lyrics to Chitty Chitty Bang Bang into your butthole
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
It's my mom's birthday today. My mom rules. If you're not my mom, then FUCK YOU!
static.klipy.com
I Love My Mom! Heartfelt Message
Alt: I Love My Mom! animated gif
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
This book is fantastic. The story of how her grandfather gave his future son-in-law a lifelong nickname is absolutely insane.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Shout-out to the person who threatened me with violence because I called my incredibly spoiled and loved dog stupid. For the record, my dog won't go through a door that's not completely open (unless of course I'm pooping where she will barge in the bathroom like an ATF agent in Waco)
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
I put on The Wire and a preview for Practical Magic started playing but I didn't realize what was happening. You can imagine my confusion as I didn't remember these particular members of the Barksdale organization.
Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman dancing on stairs and the pause menu shows the Wire
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
She's pretty stupid. She pees on the floor and snores so loudly it wakes up at night. She's the greatest.
A white man with long brown hair snuggles up to a graying muzzle of a large brown dog
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
I don't follow football but I like having Redzone on while I do laundry. Pardon me if this an tired take, but this dude is Casey Affleck, right?
A New Orleans Saints coach who looks just like Casey Affleck.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Honkin' on a Bobo I know, I know it's serious
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
I'm glad I get to share a planet with Jeff Rosenstock and his band
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
I'd love to argue but...
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Grateful Dead fans are called Deadheads. Taylor Swift fans are known as Swifties. Pantera fans are several months behind on child support.
The band Pantera plays in front of a giant crowd with video screens showing the bald lead singer
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Mitch McConnell sunken, puckered face next to a bunch of atomic warheads candy
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Iron Maiden goes a thousand times harder than bands that are fifty years younger than them. Unbelievable.
The band Iron Maiden plays on a very large stage with video screens and an image of a pyramid as a backdrop
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
My neighbor tried to con me into paying for part of her new fence and wants me to pay her for trimming branches that extend into her property. Cool. Very cool.
static.klipy.com
Sarcastic Smile Guy
Alt: Bill Haverchuck from Freaks and Geeks with a pained smile
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
I got both of mine this morning. So far, I'm feeling pretty great. Either I feel absolutely no effects or I feel like the Undertaker threw me off the top of Hell In A Cell.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
When you are at the Emmys but have to inseminate a horse immediately afterwards.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
My elderly dog's incontinence is certainly not helping my anxiety and stress at the moment.
static.klipy.com
Wrestler Edge's Intense Wide Eyes
Alt: Wrestler Adam Copeland's Intense Wide Eyes
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
One of my biggest fears is getting a phone and the voice on the line says "We've kidnapped your family. If you ever want to see them again, you must accurately explain pass interference and holding."
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Reposted by PaxtonPullman
PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
A member of Kneecap, a big tough guy, Kneecap, comes up to me in a ski mask. Have you ever seen Barron ski? Nobody knows more more about the skiing than him. Big, tough guy with his ski mask soaked with tears. He said "Nobody ever thought of Irish unification before" I was the first.
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Reposted by PaxtonPullman
PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Pro Wrestling fuckin' rules. #aew 🤼‍♂️
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Pro Wrestling fuckin' rules. #aew 🤼‍♂️
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Lots of things wrong with this AI generated advertisement: -multiple extra fingers -woman has three feet -garbled gas sign -Black people willingly spending time in Tipton, Indiana
Yet another bullshit AI ad, this says restaurants without two hour wait times for the town of Tipton Indiana
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Reposted by PaxtonPullman
AEW On TV @aewontv.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Tonight is for you We honor our fallen friend Andy "The Butcher" Williams as #AEWCollision is live on TNT and HBO Max
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
A member of Kneecap, a big tough guy, Kneecap, comes up to me in a ski mask. Have you ever seen Barron ski? Nobody knows more more about the skiing than him. Big, tough guy with his ski mask soaked with tears. He said "Nobody ever thought of Irish unification before" I was the first.
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PaxtonPullman @paxtonpullman.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I shaved my big bushy mustache because I'm job hunting and gotta hide the fact that I'm a rock and fucking roller. On the plus side, it's much smoother for kissing, smooching, and pleasing my wife.
static.klipy.com
Santana & Rob Thomas: Hot One Performance
Alt: Santana & Rob Thomas Smooth music video
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Reposted by PaxtonPullman
Olaf Falafel @ofalafel.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
How Mr Miyagi eats his Babybel
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