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geoffrey

@parsnip.bsky.social
14K followers 686 following 69K posts

festive seasonal homosexual, tinned fish enthusiast, citrus enjoyer, los angeles evangelist, he/him made @fionaapplebot.bsky.social 🗡️🦐✨

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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 13m
should probably get in the habit of dropping a rare felt-cute/cut thirst trap at any hour other than "uk office lunch break"
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Cat Manning @catacalypto.bsky.social · 29m
Coldest take in the world but ten years on, Emotion and Emotion Side B are still both perfect albums.
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 58m
this is the ideal salad ingredient ratio. you may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 1h
wait i think i've seen that one
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 22/10/2024
i actually do think a major problem with salad culture is that we've decided it's supposed to be like 50% leaves and 50% everything else. this is false. it's like 33% leaves 33% the filling stuff 33% flavorful fixings
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Thor Benson @thorbenson.bsky.social · 1h
I love how "based" means the equivalent to being Pat Buchanan or something on the right
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 16h
my cleverness was never meant to be applied to grave moral crimes. it is for enchanting handsome men
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 16h
born to be a charmingly louche little f word, forced to moralize on the internet
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 2h
every day there are more sentences
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ghost malone ergo propter bones @proptermalone.bsky.social · 2h
because it's a facially and formally neutral rule that nevertheless does racism
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Anthony Edwards @edwardsanthonyb.bsky.social · 5h
Breaking news: The Earth is getting rounder agupubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1029/...
INBOX:
Earth’s poles are rising by 0.5 to 1 millimeters per year, slowly un-squashing our planet’s slightly flattened, jelly-donut-like shape, according to a new study. Linking satellite measurements of changing altitude across Earth’s surface from 1997 to 2015 to the planet’s shape, researchers found that the rounding effect also seems to be accelerating over time, with the poles rising an extra 0.4 millimeters per year faster every decade. Though our planet seems solid, the Earth’s interior acts more like an extremely slow-flowing liquid, warping over time under forces like the weight of ice sheets and oceans. Currently, our planet bulges out a little around the equator. But as ice sheets melt and reduce the force acting on the Earth at the poles, the equator is gradually cinching in as the poles push upwards, molding our planet into a more spherical shape. [JGR Solid Earth study]

https://agupubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1029/2026JB034224
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 2h
honestly after three nights straight of bad sleep on a 90 degree day i fully expected to crash out after five minutes on the bike so i am happy just getting something on the board today 😌 (kinda looks like i crushed it but my heart rate is just elevated lol, i assure you i did not)
Spinning
i Today, 5:14PM • Inspire 3
Duration
32 min, 7 sec
Energy burned
Avg heart rate
Cardio load
Zone min
165 bpm
82
63 Zone Min
Heart rate zones
165 bpm (avg)
You spent 32 minutes in vigorous and peak zones.
You didn't spend any time in the moderate zone.
 below is a graph of heart rate during the ride, between the 140s and the 180s in fairly uniform peaks and valleys
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 3h
i do not know who the antisemitism squirrel is and i am very confused by people talking about them as though i might
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Jennifer Harris @jwharris.bsky.social · 4h
Barnstorming going well I see...
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 4h
yeah
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 6h
the majority on the georgia state election board are traitors, criminal violators of the public trust, enemies to a democratic republic, and they will be for the rest of their lives
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Tim Carvell @timcarvell.bsky.social · 13h
I want to believe that someone at the Times knew what they were doing here.
New York Times homepage link reading: 
FRANK BRUNI AND BRET STEPHENS:
Behold the Paragons of Rank Incompetence
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
[slaps the roof of the united states] this baby can fit so much Gender
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 7h
oh the government torture lawyer has thoughts about acceptable forms of violence
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 16h
born to be a charmingly louche little f word, forced to moralize on the internet
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 18h
don't at all mean this as comparable to what women experience but as a kid who adopted women's jeans before skinny jeans for men were a thing i am pretty familiar with what adult men will say to someone they think is a teen girl from behind and it was pretty illuminating
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 18h
i am desperately calling for france and germany to call this play. two years is not a long time, and republican voters are very stupid. do you remember how quickly "freedom fries" went away? they are even stupider and more short-sighted now than then
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 18h
anyway sorry for complaining publicly about annoying, antisocial behavior on here but it is my pressure release vent for not being too mean to the people who do it individually
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 21h
i was looking for a specific other thing to comment on but this is very stupid. just a fundamental misunderstanding of how music is made. i would be ashamed to even mull over an opinion like this
This will hurt some folks, but this is why most "pop" art/music is garbage and why so many "pop" artists (writers, musicians, painters) don't see a
problem with Al. They were already doing formulaic work. You liked it because it was fun
and easy to digest, like potato chips.
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 21h
the president of the united states says racisms i as a white man with a racist grandfather have never even imagined. i had to work backwards to try to understand the stereotype here and i'm not at all confident i landed on it
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 22h
i mean it won't change any part of the calculus of my vote but this was a stupid answer lol
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 22h
a post with a sufficient number of likes turns into a random word association game where everyone decides it means whatever their four favorite words in it suggest to them from the swirling aether of their minds
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 23h
ice, cbp, and dhs are disappearing people, beating them, depriving them of their rights, torturing them, and sending them to unstable countries they have never been to and have no way of finding safety in. we know all of this. if she did knowingly abet his escape from that possibility she is a hero
cbsnews.com
Former Ann Arbor nurse accused of helping ICE detainee flee hospital
A former Trinity Health Ann Arbor Hospital nurse is charged under a criminal complaint after she allegedly helped a man who was detained by the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement to flee the hos...
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Chris Geidner @chrisgeidner.bsky.social · 23h
It's hard to fathom that, let alone be OK with the fact that, the six people who allowed tonight to happen will start hearing cases next week, the outcome of which will affect us all.
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Bill Grueskin @bgrueskin.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Nashville Banner reporter Steven Hale, describing how prison officials kept drawing the curtain to hide how badly they were botching this: “A lot of this execution — or attempted execution, whatever it was — happened when we could not see what was going on.”
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Max Kennerly @maxkennerly.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
That's where I've been for a while. We can't even reach questions about the death penalty itself because we fail essential predicates such as "fair and consistent criminal justice system" and "reliable death penalty verdicts that leave no reasonable doubt" and, as shown tonight, "humane execution."
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
there are moral arguments against the death penalty in its ideal form but in real life you never need to get there. the prior question is "can the state be trusted to end the life only of the rightly convicted without torture?" and the answer is no
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
[slaps the roof of the united states] this baby can fit so much Gender
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Kieran Healy @kjhealy.co · 28/09/2026
Of course, one should bear in mind that correlation does not equal castration.
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Martha Smith @mostlymartha.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Upside: Voting in California is really easy. Downside: We are asked to vote on far too many things, an absurd number of things, all of which are confusingly presented on purpose. Our State Representatives are basically mascots since voters do everything themselves.
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
so it turns out my evening news choices tonight are the california gubernatorial debate [see attached] or an interview with rahm emanuel
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Louis @louisevans.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Skipped the Nazis, huh.
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
oh jesus christ what do you mean the (singular) california gubernatorial debate is tonight
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
it remains stunning how hungry this supreme court majority is for executions
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
because it's impossible for anything in the republican party to be merely incompetent OR corrupt, sure looks like trump admin conspired with senators schmitt and grassley to set a perjury trap for smith, but after trump doj warned that it wasn't ready for primetime schmitt went ahead with it anyway
ms.now
Eric Schmitt was warned about the Jack Smith texts. He used them anyway.
As Republicans on Capitol Hill try to figure out how Eric Schmitt’s bombshell fell apart so embarrassingly, it turns out he was warned that the texts were unvetted.
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
and what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
jolly, the mascot for meta ai muse, a rotund labubu-like creature with ivory fuzzy fur everywhere but a patch of flesh around its face, with hollow cartoon eyes, rosy cheeks, and a simple smile, turned to reveal an inexplicably caked up ass, turning back to look at you
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William B. Fuckley @opinionhaver.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
remember: it saved no net money, social services US citizens are getting cut, and left the US in a weaker place geopolitically. none of the debates about fiscal responsibility, obligation to US citizens first, or 'hard choices' actually apply. they're all bullshit. killed people for nothing at all.
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Maggie Astor @maggieastor.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
The 988 suicide prevention hotline's Press 3 option — which provides specialized services to LGBTQ callers — has been restored more than a year after the Trump administration shut it down. Confirmed by HHS and the office of Senator Tammy Baldwin, who led on legislation that forced its restoration
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
hauling this one out again, this time for los angeles!
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rev. howard arson @theophite.bsky.social · 13/02/2025
any song which might be described as a "cuckold anthem" is a banger. (robyn's "dancing on my own," tame impala's "the less i know the better," don henley's "boys of summer.")
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
never were there two fiercer, fitter, definitely not weirdo warriors
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Susan Rinkunas @susanrinkunas.com · 30/09/2026
To recap: three GOP-led states that wanted the Supreme Court to overturn Roe v. Wade in order to "send abortion back to the states" are now asking the Court to strike down abortion protections in blue states
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
not to elide the litany of bigotries in this speech but the way this creep moves is so weird
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
i wouldn't say i'm totally convinced by the california billionaire tax proposition but man said billionaires are absolutely blanketing us with ads against it, functionally arguing against the concept of taxes in general, and i've gotta admit i'm catching it negatively polarizing me
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
pete hegseth is going to become the first secretary of defense to be impeached since the 1870s — incidentally, back when the title actually was "secretary of war"
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