Reposted by big feeleriva (googlyfied) ⊬🦉🏳️⚧️ @thelittleoutsider.neocities.org · 1hthinking about @imabirdplane.bsky.social rnopen.spotify.comfragile (feat. WRENN)gnash, WRENN · us · Song · 2016 121
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 21hGuys. What if I get to redo my college years? There’s a community college somewhere near the apartment. I can get a different associates degree, in something I’m actually interested in pursuing. My soon-to-be roommate apparently goes to it. 140
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 21hI guess it’s good I’m starting in a new place. With no memories of hiding from my dad or other traumatic experiences. But still, this is all I know. 140
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 23hIt’s so funny cause I could talk about uncomfy mental illness stuff but people really don’t like hearing about the female reproductive system or how it affects people who have them. It’s too icky for them “we don’t talk about that” society will never change 030
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 23hI got the iud not only for horrible periods but bc I was having the worst pmdd worsening my bpd symptoms even more. Like I was nonfunctional & suicidal and that’s why I was in the hospital. 110
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Fun health/female reproductive system fact I learned today: your hormonal iud could stop working over time and your period could come back so today was that day for me and everything awful and huge is happening at once 120
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026OH MY GOD I HEARD BACK FROM MY CASEWORKER ALL THEY NEED IS SOME DOCUMENTS AND THEN ILL GET AN ACCEPTANCE LETTER AND A DATE 360
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Do y’all think I’m narcissistic in any way bc I realize I only talk about myself on here but that’s the point of this account. Somewhere to dump the nasty shit in my brain. I’m always scared of becoming my narcissistic dad who I cut ties with. I even texted my mom about it and this was her answer 410
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Holy shit, yes www.instagram.com/reel/Dd1e9sX...instagram.comriley on Instagram: "take this audio with a grain of salt. BPD is a spectrum and every person is different. — not every person with BPD experiences this in childhood. and not every person with BPD is ...2,516 likes, 140 comments - rileyylizabeth on September 28, 2026: "take this audio with a grain of salt. BPD is a spectrum and every person is different. — not every person with BPD experiences this i... 012
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe I am okay I am safe 570
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I FOUND IT. IT WAS UNDER MY BED. EVERYTHING IS OK NOW. 120
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Caseworker emailed housing program that i want to take the apartment THIS MORNING and they still haven’t responded 240
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I remember one time i was in the hospital and they were weening me off Effexor which I’d been on for 10 years. I was in terrible shape. I got a fresh stress ball and squeezed it so much it started ripping that’s a lot of anxiety 220
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Did a bunch of purging of ~things~ felt good & will be great for moving. I even found my stressball which would’ve helped tremendously over the past few days but I’m just so happy to have it at my fingertips (literally and figuratively) they are magic 110
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Oh nothing just crying cause this could be one of the last times making dinner in this apartment 340
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026I’m glad I didn’t feel shame, that’s progress. That’s usually a sign of very low self-worth and esteem general feeling of brokenness. Progress!!!! 150
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026It wasnt even really blowing up tho. It was a valid reaction tbh. Except intensified. Uh. Someone who saw it… @uggcaveman.bsky.social would you count what I did as blowing up? 130
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026I’m so embarrassed and guilty for blowing up this morning and then I left it up for hours after I passed back out and now deleting it but really I only want people who follow me to know & not be afraid of the real me 340
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Waking up to see that comment was not a great way to start the day. Gonna be doing a lot of DBT today. 120
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026How to be a normal person without debilitatingly intense emotions & reactions so I do… Anything 030
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Should i be…. Packing? Idk i have a weird feeling it’s not gonna go as id like. There were some important technicalities I didn’t know about. I’m anxious again which is cool. 140
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Overhearing my mom say talking about the apartment and how I handle things it’s like damn you’re just gonna lay my vulnerabilities out there so casually I feel attacked 130
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Btw I figured out the reason for a lot of things recently. Hormones be hatin 110
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Reminder to myself: Just because you don’t know with absolute certainty, doesn’t mean the worst is going to happen. 020
Reposted by big feelerDr. Glenn Patrick Doyle @drdoylesays.bsky.social · 26/09/2026I've never met anyone who "wanted" to stay focused on their past, but trauma recovery isn't really for anyone who would want to focus backward anyway. Recovery is for people sick & tired of focusing on their past. It's about the tools & patterns that will take us into the future. 04910
Reposted by big feelerDr. Glenn Patrick Doyle @drdoylesays.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Let yourself hope. Not in some touchy feely, abstract, warm & fuzzy way. Let your hope be gritty & realistic. Let it not have to f*ck w/ denial or compartmentalization. Trauma recovery is a dark ride-- but the hope that fuels it truly is grounded in science & experience. 07213
Reposted by big feelerUGG!!! @uggcaveman.bsky.social · 25/09/2026no one know how to do it. you just do it. and one day you wake up, and you not even realize that you at home 031
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026This is gonna take a load of 1. Processing 2. Managing anxiety 140
Reposted by big feelerEndless Screaming @infinitescream.bsky.social · 25/09/2026AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH 0275
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Going through all the stages of grief after accepting my next (first) apt 030
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Before anyone asks anything about rent or money, I don’t know, and quite frankly I don’t owe you that information. I know I’ve been open about that but a lot of this supportive housing program is kind of take the place first, figure it out later and I’m never gonna be in debt 020
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I like the apartment, I can see myself living there, and I will be, but what if I can’t do it on my own I know, I know. What if I can But I don’t know yet 140
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I have literally lived in this apartment since I was 1 I’m about to live somewhere else where I don’t have my mom to hug or be cute with No watching detective shows or singing competitions together I’m gonna have a roommate I’ve never met tho she seems sweet And the rest of the time it’ll just be me 140
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I gotta leave in less than an hour my stomach hurts from anxiety I don’t think I have time for a mindfulness exercise 120
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 25/09/2026So sleepy but if i go to sleep now ill wake up ridiculously early again & then feel the need to nap for awhile but i got the apt viewing at 1, gotta leave around noon, and want time for breakfast What, do people without adhd & gad not go over every single detail of the day a big event is happening? 230
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 24/09/2026DBT skill of the day: Observing your emotions without judgements Part 1: identifying and naming your emotions Part 2: recognizing triggers and examining responses Part 3: examining thoughts and challenging biases Ex. beliefs, cognitive distortions. Examine how they influence your perception 120
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 24/09/2026Viewing is tomorrow at 1pm. All the anxiety is flooding back. Not like the first apartment- that was a breakdown. But there is a certain calmness in knowing this is the place. I’m ready, just scared, and I don’t have to let the fear lead. 130
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 24/09/2026Went to sleep at 11:30 (good!!!) & woke up at 5:30 sad & anxious about moving even though I haven’t seen the place yet. I’m gonna take the place. No more nos. Plus this place has a laundry room! That almost never happens. 250
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Omg my caseworker told me the agency has another apartment available! 350
big feeler @notsamflower.bsky.social · 23/09/2026My glasses make me look nerdy AND they’re too small for my head (they’re kid sized which I guess is why they look nerdy. Yknow, glasses companies should be kinder to kids) so now idk what to do 240
Reposted by big feelerEndless Screaming @infinitescream.bsky.social · 22/09/2026AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH 0174
