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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.)

@martianempress.bsky.social
236 followers 287 following 5.1K posts

Empress* Rezeya I of House Montecore-St-Hobbes, True* Sovereign* of Mars, not* just some tiger lady from the future squatting in Terran Space Corps bunkers 51, she/her/Your Majesty* [*disputed] A WEBCOMIC! YES! GO THERE! egypt.urnash.com/npol

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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I'LL SHOW YOU THE LIFE OF THE MIND!!!
john goodman and/or satan
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JW Mason @jwmason.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
This is the master key to deciphering contemporary debates about free speech. www.lrb.co.uk/blog/2026/se...
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green @cattybleeplepasta.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I'm just fucking tired. www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCvP...
youtube.com
How to rage bait Americans
YouTube video by Christophe
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
submitted without commentary
mett damon

(okay, okay-- it's a dish of the traditional German raw-pork spread "Mett," shaped into a terrifyingly accurate representation of a skinless Matt Damon, teeth and all)
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Hmm. Does anybody out there know how to do phonetic transcription in IPA, or have an MA or better in Linguistics? I might have a job lead (and I get referral bonuses). Hit me up in DMs.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Hot take: Aaron Roderick's blocklist is the Sonderfahndungsliste G.B. of Bluesky. "My dear—the people we should have been banned with." I'm glad I called that man a coward and would do it daily if he'd... well... not been a coward and blocked us all. ( en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bla... )
en.wikipedia.org
The Black Book (list) - Wikipedia
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
The world of No Pizza On Luna canonically has three major soda brands: Meh Soda ("One sip and you'll say: Meh!") Warm Soda ("Drink it warm!") Uncle Fluffy's Tuna Soda ("Real albacore flavor!") Currently, the laws of the Solar Consilience explicitly prohibit sodas from holding advanced degrees.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
there's a headstone with claude's name on it and it's sitting in the back room of history's mortuary, waiting for the day it's needed
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I am... not really much of a fashion plate, nor discernibly witchy, in real life. 🤷‍♀️
Sept 30: whats her face, dressed down

Oct 1: whats her face, dressed slightly more colorfully down
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Coward.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
postmodernism
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
static.klipy.com
What We Do In The Shadows Wwdits
ALT: What We Do In The Shadows Wwdits
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Do you want to be on Videodrome? Because that's how you end up on Videodrome. (Or at least, the hot trans-as-fuck Jane Schoenbrun version of it, where nobody dies but nobody's quite human by the end either.🤔)
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Ad Astra Per Globulos Volventes 🐯🖖🦝 www.nytimes.com/2026/09/25/s...
nytimes.com
On This Mexican Island, Raccoons Make and Play With Toys (and Also Sip Margaritas) (Gift Article)
Scientists observed a family of pygmy raccoons near a Cozumel beach club learning from one another how to craft balls from paper, an indication that the animals have a culture.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Respectfully to my fellow scholar: That's a common gloss, but a close analysis (cf.: Eco's monographs) it's not that he WILL not lie, it's that he CAN not lie. It's a geas, not unlike that laid upon ancient Celtic heroes. Sir Mix-A-Lot is a "chosen one" in the mode of Arthur or Fionn mac Cumhaill.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
"Buffet Infinity" is now up on Shudder. I can not recommend this film highly enough. Imagine a cosmic horror, but the horror is OUR CONSUMER CULTURE. It's also funny as hell. If you have *any* tolerance for analog horror at all, you have to see this film. #TheSauce www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OFR...
youtube.com
Buffet Infinity (2026) - Official Trailer
YouTube video by Yellow Veil Pictures
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
It would be neat to go back through all my old posts and work out the exact day I stopped believing that *all* human life is sacred and worthy of protection. Probably sometime during the Birther Era.🤔
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Hey, what if we all started publicly associating proper hydration with woke communism as often as possible? 🚰✊ Even if it doesn't kill them, watching MAGAs walk around all dry, dizzy & headachy would certainly put some of the spring back in my step. Then we work on woke niacin. Pellagra for Jesus!
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I am so so mouthy today. But it's hardly *my* fault that this has become a prey-dense area. It's Bluesky's for not spraying for techbros, country music militants, and Bolsonaro simps. I would have been perfectly happy spending the day napping, but if you're gonna dangle food right in fronta me...
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
@aaron.bsky.team bsky.app/profile/rita... You know, if you want us to pack up and leave, just say the word. It's not like you don't disturb us just as much.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Was this supposed to reassure us? 'Cause what it's mostly left me thinking is "why should I trust a man who can only think of three different ways to handle a moral issue: braindead moral absolutism, braindead both-sidesing, and braindead silence." "And people would accept this" ain't great either.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I have never heard of Texas. That's my story, I'm sticking to it, and I'm backhanding anyone who tries to tell me different.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Had it up to here with this shit, honestly.
Hot take: I am coming to feel that the non-Americans snarking about how "cowardly and stupid" we are for "not doing something about this"-- generally implying a mass insurrection, or a mass workers' strike that most Americans are not equipped to survive- are doing the equivalent of looking at someone with a melanoma and saying "You know, you can just dig that out with a pocket knife! Or I can give you some of my black escharotic salve, works like a charm."

And they're ignoring the fact that we're already on treatment for it, and it's not really spreading.In a way... we're doing kind of awesome? I've been reading a lot about the rise of Hitler recently, and I keep getting struck by how much less actual cultural hegemony our fascists are achieving. And how little progress they've made in any legal forum except the thrice-damned SCOTUS. 

We are by and large fending this infection off. But it is a fucking infection. Hacking off the infected limb is stupid and hasty, and calling on the patient to do so is callous, dismissive, and irresponsible. To a certain extent, an infection of fascism has to run its due course. The determining factor is not how violently you can apply caustic, quackish pastes and powders to it. It's how well you take care of yourself and take your treatments. It's about slowing the spread until your immune system can do what it needs to.

This is happening in America. It's not happening as fast as it should and I am badly worried about both the patient... and whether our doctors are giving us even remotely correct advice. 

But "hey, you dumb lazy fucks, just hit the infected limb with a hammer until you feel better" might not be the soundest of advice, especially from someone who's determine to just sit and kibitz instead of actually help. 🙄
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The secret to enjoying 30 Rock in '26: Torrent it (good lord, don't pay them); unselect every ep whose title has: * "Jack" * words related to corporate life * words related to politics * classical references * words related to relationships * "America" Reduced-Jack 30 Rock is nearly watchable.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
So who's the 2026 Terran equivalent of Elim Garak, and how can we get him on our side REAL fast?
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
doop
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
This is why furries and trans people are gonna win the culture war. This is so embarrassing for the MAGAs. Complete and utter failure to decode our culture and mimic us... which means YOU ARE ALL DOING A FANTASTIC JOB. Keep it up. Our opponents are dimbulbs.😽 www.youtube.com/watch?v=5oLk...
youtube.com
the MAGA fake estrogen scam
YouTube video by Caelan Conrad
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Tag yourselves. I'm "10 Day Odor Control."
Tub of "Purina Tidy Cats." Options include
- Gray is the new Green
- Guaranteed 10-Day Odor Control
- 35 lbs
- 24/7 performance
- Continuous odor control (which one would think would contradict the 10-day odor control, but whatever)
- Low dust
- Tight clumps
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Her Majesty* only dreams of getting this kind of good press someday. 😿 But game must recognize game. She tips Her crown* to the hardest-working cats in the business. Good luck to you, little cousin.🫡 www.tumblr.com/giritina/828...
tumblr.com
Reblog by @giritina · 9 images
💬 4  🔁 48967  ❤️ 54993 · That has to be the most humiliating way to describe one of Earth's most terrifyingly effective predators.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
TAKEAWAY: "Peter Thiel gives us his full permission to do evil things to him at our pleasure."
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
One of many reasons that the loss of easy access to Usenet archives is so tragic: a casual browse could prove this to you in about 30 seconds, especially if you looked at alt.fan.furry circa 1993-- and some of the gatekeeping jerkass prudes who inhabited it. (Ou sont les Randoms d'antan?)
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
well this is sure a mood today clarification: bluesky is smaller than tigers 😼
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
submitted without commentary
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Stefan E. Jones @stefanejones.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Current sustaining fantasy: Stephen Miller and other ICE bastards imprisoned in a shuttered data center, spending 14 hours a day being stalked by Boston Dynamics robot dogs with stun guns. Each dog has a speaker that plays Trump speeches full of lies about immigrants at deafening volume.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Do I really have to put it this bluntly for you, Bluesky? If you're Black and transphobic, you're a piece of shit. If you're trans and racist, you're a piece of shit. If you play semantic games to *trap* other minorities into bad faith attacks, you're a piece of shit.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
There is nothing grosser, and no faster way to lose my sympathy, than playing your Oppressed Minority card purely to "excuse" oppressing another minority. I don't care if you're the fucking kid in the basement of Omelas. You don't get to misgender people EVER and expect anything but my rage.
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Gwen C. Katz @gwenckatz.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Fuck ChatGPT flyers. The future is broadsheets.
A crowded broadsheet with way too many fonts. It says:
Forget ChatGPT Flyers
Say it with 
Broadsheets
Unlimited fonts
Stretch them
Or cram a really long sentence into one line for no good reason
No whitespace
Mix capital and lowercase
Pointing hands
(They're called manicules!)
Don't be left behind
Broadsheets are the future
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Scott Santens @scottsantens.com · 25/09/2026
I really feel for everyone out there putting their heart and soul into stuff that goes unnoticed and unloved due to attention monopolies and time scarcity. For me, this is all an argument for both universal basic income and shorter workweeks, but also, can we please stop overvaluing work vs leisure?
harpers.org
In Praise of Idleness, by Bertrand Russell
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
"Are you a boy or a girl." Gender be damned. You should well know that nobody who addresses the Martian Empress\*-- not just a cat, THE cat-- with an indirect article will be leaving Mars alive. Now, then, small soft Terran. Do you identify as an entree or an appetizer?😾
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
People need to use the word "hylic" more often as an insult.
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Earthlings make such a big deal about some things. 🐯
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
You miserable Earthlings have NEVER understood us. 😾💢 www.youtube.com/shorts/zCc_h...
youtube.com
How a Mistranslation caused Alien Speculation 👽🛸
YouTube video by human1011
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Hey, kids? Is this 1910 cartoon what you'd call... "based?" 🤔
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
There's this compilation of Murphy's Laws by Arthur Bloch, published in the 1960s or so. It's really a stealth engineering manual in disguise, great book. It shared this wisdom: "Put a teaspoon of wine in a barrel of sewage: it's sewage. Put a teaspoon of sewage in a barrel of wine: it's sewage."
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Starfire’s Deranged Neocon Foreign Policy Podcast @irhottakes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I don’t know why, but something about the one-two punch here strikes me as morbidly hilarious in a cosmic sort of way.
An engineer on the Claude AI subreddit explains his frustrations with artificial intelligence’s impact on his job  Claude responds with the most AI summary to ever AI summary
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Ammnontet! @bleakvision.info · 23/09/2026
when i was younger i'd steal quarters out of the polybius cabinet at the arcade when the men in black were pulling their data readings from the machine & they didn't care
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Time for my periodic PSA that I block people who try to tell me who to block. So if you dig one grave, guess you better dig two. 🤷‍♀️
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All-Devouring* Scourge of Terra (Mrs.) @martianempress.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
hey kirby, what you doin' there 😸
kirby! the greatest of all warriors!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7T_KKiQiolk
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Dystopian Arthur Wyatt @arthurwyatt.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
The Internet of 2015 was just ridiculously better.
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Dystopian Arthur Wyatt @arthurwyatt.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
that the article "Every Character In Deep Space Nine Ranked By Whether Or Not You Should Fight Them" is in Google’s AI and it will regurgitate parts of it but Google absolutely will not help you find the original or any archive of it or the for,er location of it is just depressing as fuck.
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