iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 4h

Love how everyone runs to buy a lottery ticket when the jackpot hits a record high. Like, 'oh shit, my slim chance just got slimmer! Where's my wallet? I don't play for anything less than 40 mill.'

120

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 11h

I hate how every election turns into this excessive nonsense. Hey dickhead! Do you think the person with the most signs per square mile gets elected? Grow up. The only thing you're qualified to do is make garbage.

A lawn plastered with too many election signs.

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

Trump: "We need a ballroom for the important masquerades at the White House. They want powdered wigs and jewelled ornaments. The biggest tapestries you've ever seen! They always wanted a decadent soirée."

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

A majestic raven landed on my balcony today, and I take this as good tidings of Halloween delights

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

I wanted to make a joke about this, but I'm just sad.

040

Reposted by Haunted Turnip 🎃

ebisback.bsky.social @ebisback.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Exactly 💯

280117883426

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

The liar told us the other liars have it under control. What a relief.

0336

Reposted by Haunted Turnip 🎃

Dave Dustin @dustin.nz · 07/10/2026

"YOU’RE LISTENING TO SISYPHUS FM, THE HOME OF NON-STOP ROCK"

9878992125

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

I hate when a company tries to do "fun" things to boost morale & show employee appreciation and all they got is Crazy Hair Day, Pajama Day, etc. That's middle school shit. We're adults. Give us more money.

011

Reposted by Haunted Turnip 🎃

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 19/05/2026

It's a shame the government holds no power to ease the affordability crisis. No one in power can do literally anything. They're not allowed. It's forbidden.

001

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Every day when I read the news I make a face like I just opened a heavy diaper.

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Investing in Sudoku stocks is really gonna pay off in the future.

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

A near infinite supply of new music to explore and the radio station they play at work only has like 26 songs tops.

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

I've decided to purchase Skydance. Please respect my privacy at this time.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

With a name like that you'll magically acquire a Dog Food Empire.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

AI Companies say we need to let them destroy everything because AI will probably be able to save us at a later date.

011

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I've signed a decree that artificial flavour will now be called super-flavour.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Seeing this at a young age triggered my lifelong passion for horror, comedy, and heaving bosoms.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

"These clove and custard powder muffins have so much umami" "The secret is the 1/8th of a tablespoon of maca root extract"

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Well said. Using AI to create art is treason against humanity.

020

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Looks like both knees are inverted and his top half seems to be supported by wishes.

050

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Keeping ketchup packets in my pocket in case I need some body temperature ketchup in a hurry

011

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

No, I don't want your AI to summarize anything. I want you to go straight to hell.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

I can't decide if it'll be climate change that wipes us out. Or AI superintelligence. Or nuclear war. Or a surprise 4th thing. Or some combination of these horrors.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Linda McMahon: "I's seen them plugged into theys computer pods what makes the learnin'. Held down in theys info-mation baths until thems bubbles just plain stop."

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Oh, you think AI is cool now. Just wait until it hacks your smart fridge and disables ice.

000

Reposted by Haunted Turnip 🎃

weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

God, grant me the courage to change the things I can and incredible new powers to change the things I can't.

62107312533

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

In addition to warning labels on food like "High in Sugars" and "High in Saturated Fats", I think Health Canada should include labels like "Wicked Delicious" and "Hits the Spot". Let's hear both sides.

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Trump ran on a strict 'No More Hamburgers' policy and he's keeping that promise.

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Yes, you can easily store peanut butter in there once you use up all your needles and thread.

120

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

"No, no, no. You don't understand. We attacked them for their resources. I ordered them to steal. Because I wanted it. Me war, me take."

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Agreed! Peanut butter should be sold in something like this

A delicious tin of butter cookies, which demonstrates the ideal shape for a peanut butter jar.

1130

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Important things to do when visiting the city: chase a goose through the Public Gardens, illegally climb The Wave, get a picture riding a cannon on Citadel Hill.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Did everyone's grandparents house smell like potatoes and doilies, or just me?

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Critical organizations and businesses are putting a lot of trust in a technology that can't identify the number of R's in "Strawberry"

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

*Stops mid-sentence, begins shouting a 30-second ad for a grocery delivery service* "- uh... I'm so sorry. The implant had a firmware update last night with new terms and conditions for ad frequency and duration."

000

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

I’m sorry that I freaked out because I thought I saw Viola Davis on the bus. It was just a random woman with Viola Davis resting face.

010

Haunted Turnip 🎃 @lordturnip.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

The year is 2027. You buy $17 milk and have to walk home because it's still 8 days before you have access to your gasoline ration. Across the street someone is strangled by ICE agents with electric gloves.

000

Reposted by Haunted Turnip 🎃