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Jordan

@jordanclock.bsky.social
398 followers 170 following 763 posts

Just a dude looking to tell people about his rad cats. He/him

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Reposted by Jordan
mattie lubchansky @mattielubchansky.com · 29/04/2026
i think a lot of people who were not alive or old enough to be really cognizant when smoking got banned indoors have a memory of just how fucking bad everyone and everyone smelled all the time
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
The only opportunity in Troy, MI is to drive on I-75 past exit 69 for Big Beaver Road.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
DF is throwing their goodwill directly into the furnaces powering AI data centers. This glowing appraisal of DLSS 5 reeks and is beyond disappointing from a group known for critiquing even the most mild of image quality issues.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
It's true. US pilots are only okay with domestic murdering of school children. It's the one tradition they don't think we should export. No one knows if that belief is a requirement to become a US pilot or becoming a US pilot makes you believe that.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 20/02/2026
Was his campaign slogan "He's not A dingus, he's R dingus!"?
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 18/02/2026
I left my favorite GI Joe action figure in a room with other toys to find out what they're thinking and report back to me. I bet they're contemplating consciousness or discussing the meaning of identity!
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 17/02/2026
I agree that the "own nothing, rent everything" group will take advantage of the situation, but I feel like the shortages are more so a side effect of short sighted rushes to get in on the bubble than any kind of intentional strategy. They're just too dumb and greedy to see how this backfires.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
Relatedly, I hate seeing posts with asterisks in sensitive words, like suicide. It doesn't obscure the word enough for people trying to avoid the subject and circumvents muted word lists so those people now are seeing something they've tried to avoid.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 18/01/2026
How does the fox plead? Not guilty-ty-ty-ty
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 16/01/2026
Oh no, @jordantyranny.bsky.social, I have some terrible news. 😢
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 29/12/2025
An important lesson in all of this is that if you only know someone for movies they've been in and the glamour shots that show up in a search, you should at least read their wiki page before eulogizing them. Especially if their filmography ends 50 years ago.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 14/12/2025
Cheez-It Citrus Bowl? Ew. That sounds disgusting. College football fans have freaky pallets.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 29/11/2025
Everyone else has covered the tone and premise of this blurb, but can we also bully Thë Nêw Yōrkér for continuing to use a diaeresis on words like 'reenter'? It looks obnoxious. Just drop it or use a hyphen like everyone else in American English.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 16/11/2025
I will never be able to find a toy more engaging, more enthralling to my cat Banana Nut than casting a shadow of my hand on the floor and wiggling my fingers. His sole purpose on earth is to hunt shadows and he is dedicated to this mission.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 16/11/2025
It's so nice that when they heard we are going to eat the rich, they decided to become wagyu.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
This is written like the victim was the equivalent of a banana peel that threw itself in Gaetz's path for him to have an unfortunate slip. The level of engineering and creativity that goes into constructing the English language like this is as impressive as it is disgusting.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 08/11/2025
One must imagine Cuomo happy.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 02/11/2025
I'd love to hear @illconceivedpodcast.com discuss the framing of population decline by grouping countries by GDP. As if the GDP of those top 15 countries isn't buoyed significantly by the exploitation of the bottom countries.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 28/10/2025
I want to see Trump's clock drawing. It's probably the second most disturbing drawing he has made since the Epstein birthday card.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 12/10/2025
The ones that aren't out there shooting dogs or kidnapping random brown people are just too cowardly to do it themselves, so they have to settle for simply enabling those acts. In years prior some could have been described as the banality of evil but now every member is just as complicit.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 01/10/2025
Dude. It's so October.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 10/09/2025
I always hope people like Charlie Kirk would die but not in a targeted way. Car accidents, perforated colon from an enema gone wrong, de-orbited Starlink to the dome, slipping on a banana peel they themselves tossed on the ground. The kind of thing normal people laugh at and the right ignores.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 08/09/2025
By Kavanaugh's reasoning, cops should have the right to enter any home where a man is with children he knows or is familiar with because most CSA is done in home by men that the children know. And it would only be a "brief encounter" with no harm or inconvenience!
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 05/09/2025
Both Dog Mode and FSD are so dangerous because they are designed and marketed more to be convenient and trustworthy than reliable. When a failure results in death or injury, we can only blame Tesla as the users were simply taking them at their word.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
Wearing glasses for the first time in months and anytime someone points it out I look at them with concern and say "Buddy. I wear glasses *every* day."
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
Willy and Banana Nut subtly telling me it is bed time.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 30/06/2025
This is just a setup to another mea culpa video in a few weeks, right? There's no other explanation for making a 20 minute video about how AI is making people dumber sponsored by an AI news aggregator. It's too on the nose for anything else.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
ACAB includes Ando the retired explosives detection dog.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 22/05/2025
Number one reason I will never be able to go back to working in an office.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 21/05/2025
Got a new floor fan so I could hopefully use my AC less. Thought it was kind of loud but moved a lot of air so I was okay with it. I just realized it was on low the entire time and setting it to high makes me feel like the metal cage isn't enough to contain the demonic spirit within.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 12/05/2025
A single paragraph in this p̶r̶e̶s̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶l̶e̶a̶s̶e̶article alludes to how past prejudice is baked into the model without any explanation as to how Mastercard is trying to fix this. Just "It might be racist/sexist because of the biased decisions in the training data." then onto the next subject.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
Kinda crazy that popes are elected by 2/3 majority. Is God telling the other 1/3 to vote for a different guy to make them feel dumb?
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Reposted by Jordan
Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 05/05/2025
holy shit I was right
two skeets:
If reporters aren't going to take stands against this shit, they should at least check to see if Trump watched at least a little bit of ConAir this weekend. It explains both of his insane posts about reopening Alcatraz and putting tariffs on those effete French films that have woked our boys.

I'm being told it's actually The Rock I'm thinking about. Please update the question you shout at him next to a running helicopter accordingly.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 04/05/2025
Going through @worstpossible.world's back catalog and @spocksbrian.worstpossible.world's Duke Nukem is the second best impersonation I've heard, right behind @lgr-yt.bsky.social.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 03/05/2025
It's irresponsible for WTYP to have a live show in Philadelphia. How am I supposed to go back to the suburbs of Cincinnati after experiencing functional public transportation, train lines, and lively atmosphere? I'll feel like the kids returning from Narnia. I blame @donoteat.bsky.social.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 03/05/2025
How about publishers stop announcing release dates years in advance? There is no benefit to the public and they almost always get pushed back. Just announce a game is being made and give a date when it's reasonably certain to be met.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 03/05/2025
Planes, Trains, and Tunnelmobiles: My trip to Philly so far.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
It's crazy that a guy who lived such a dangerous life is 132 years old. Bro had so many near-death experiences, he built up an immunity.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
Did I learn how to dump the textures from a PSX for an argument on the internet? Yes. Was it worth it? Yes. It's an internet argument.
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Reposted by Jordan
Zane Schacht - Voice Goblin @voicesbyzane.bsky.social · 01/04/2025
Trans week of HELSTORM ROCKET BATTERY
Art of a helstorm rocket battery from warhammer fantasy
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Reposted by Jordan
Beth @chacha1847.bsky.social · 01/04/2025
A very stylized assortment of people wielding arm cannons à la newer iterations of Metroid intermixed with trans flags. The caption reads: "Repost this if Trans people should have
Samus Arm Cannons"
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 23/03/2025
Look at this guy. Look! Why does he hold his face? Does he know how cute it looks?
A cat curled up on a bed with one of his paws covering his eyes.A cat curled up on a bed with one of his paws covering his eyes.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
ACAB includes forum moderators.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 11/03/2025
I never expected to say the phrase "I'm glad my power supply died" before today but honestly that was one of the best case scenarios when my computer suddenly shut down this morning just before a major change for a huge client.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 22/02/2025
Just saw a guy at White Castle drop like $80 worth of eggs and now he has to decide whether to fill in "Eggs: 2" on the waste log.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 21/02/2025
Anyone else have a cat that gets so excited about food that they wheeze from the intensity of their purring or is mine just an exceptional glutton?
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 15/02/2025
One day Kazushige Nojima might write a story that makes a lick of sense but he sure as hell didn't start with FF7 Rebirth.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 13/02/2025
One of my cats won't eat his food if it gets a little stale but will never pass up a chance to chew at the plastic shower liner.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 11/02/2025
It's kind of crazy how the people posting this are doing themselves psychic harm over a comparison that clearly shows two different hands. It's like seeing Jesus's face in toast, except they're imagining it's their high school bully and the bread is still raw dough.
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Jordan @jordanclock.bsky.social · 05/02/2025
Anyone else ever have Amazon just subscribe you to Prime on their own? I got an email today that I started a Prime trial but I sure didn't press the series of buttons to make that happen.
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