Just fucking make #Farage answer questions under oath, which you should have done months ago.
He will perjure himself within minutes and we can have done with him.
JonnyExists
@jonnyexists.bsky.social
387 followers 328 following 2.4K posts
I have been known to breathe in (and occasionally out again), without thinking about spaceships.
![[Scene is the entrance cabin to a NATIONAL TRUST PROPERTY AND GARDENS]
1
NATIONAL TRUST EMPLOYEE [inside cabin]:
Hello there
2
[A young family - two parents two kids - have arrived at the front desk].
DAD:
Hi - do you have an activity trail, for the kids?
3
NT EMPLOYEE:
Of course – you’re just in time for the Autumn Gammon Trail!
4
MUM:
That sounds fun, doesn’t it kids?
5
NT EMPLOYEE [handing an activity sheet and pencils to the kids]:
Every autumn, the Reform Trust gammons flock back to the National Trust for the AGM. Just follow the trail round the grounds, and see how many you can spot!
6
NT EMPLOYEE [hearing something in the gardens]:
Listen - that's their call
[Calls emanating from the landscape]:
tut-tut
woke-woke
7
NT EMPLOYEE [showing the family an apparently empty fenced enclosure with some bushes in]:
They are extremely sensitive and fragile...
But you can bring them out of hiding if you put a little sign down mentioning slavery.
8
KIDS [pointing]:
There they are!
[Some little red faced PEOPLE wearing Barbour jackets and gilets emerge cautiously from the bushes. They are creeping towards a TINY SIGN in the middle of the enclosure].
[Little people noises]:
woke-woke
tut-tut
woke-woke
9
[Close-up of the TINY SIGN - we can read that it says]:
Slavery had a bit to do with building this massive house.
[Noises from the little people again as they inspect the tiny sign]:
tut-tut
woke-woke
10
MUM [pointing]:
What's that one doing there?
NT EMPLOYEE:
Oh, that's so sweet…
11
[We see that one of the people is sat on a rock, with a little laptop open on a tree stump, and they are furiously typing away].
NT EMPLOYEE:
I think he's writing a column for the Daily Telegraph…
12
[We see close up to the little person’s screen, it is a word document reading]:
Are National Trust scones secretly WOKE?
[ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreib7lt736b6rmzinml5s7kxjdaapo2a36xp4d4lssypimx3taqicdm)
