copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 07/10/2026a forecast - SNL will do an Ace Ventura Whalefall parody and it’ll be a weaker one. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 07/10/2026I swear I’d forget the Alamo if it wasn’t attached to my neck 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 26/09/2026sea turtles see turtles c(ool) turtles 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 21/09/2026everybody who’s everybody is gonna be there 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 20/09/2026nothing gets under my skin quite like being annoyed 011
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 18/09/2026Snoopy is my best friend, but Snoopy’s best friend is Woodstock 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 18/09/2026outside with the Merlin app calling up my bird friends and sometimes they come say hey 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 18/09/2026red-breasted nuthatches have kind of a JFK/mayor of Springfield vibe to their calls 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 17/09/2026if Snoopy’s best friend Woodstock wrote an autobiography I hope he’d name it “If You Wood” 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 03/09/2026it can be hard to open up about my innate magical abilities. sometimes harder than it was to master them. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 30/08/2026what would you do if there’s an alien? 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 21/08/2026this is also why my ass is the way it is. so sad. 010
Reposted by copenhagen_cool_ranchSupper Mario Broth @mariobrothblog.bsky.social · 21/08/2026When Wario is flattened in Wario Land 3, a robot must remove the weight squashing him so that he can actually move. With a small setup, Wario can destroy the robot and still get squashed. With no one lifting the weight from him, Wario will remain flat and alone forever. 382104529
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 05/08/2026I listen to the ET score to get the exact feeling the triumph you get from turning white and dying only to actually live and clamber my way up a grated ramp to my spaceship. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 30/07/2026hopping over the deli counter, removing my apron and handing it to a patron. my boss cries out “where the hell do you think YOU’RE goin’? we got a line out the door!” I pause, I look down and with a smirk reply “I gotta see about a dump”. the crowd cheers and pats my back as I skip out the door. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 27/07/2026eventually words like “operate”, “pilot” or “control” will be entirely replaced by “ratatouille”. no longer a French dish, we will commonly say things like “thanks for flying Delta, I will be your ratatouille”, “ratatoulling while under the influence”, or“government uses 5G to ratatouille your mind” 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 21/07/2026widow’s peak, widows peek, widows speak 😔 000
Reposted by copenhagen_cool_ranchjosh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 20/07/2026Worms think they're so long 722822
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 21/07/2026they shoulda made that guy Corbin from Love Island play Agamemnon. open up the gates of Troy and he’s just in that helmet shushing with his finger 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 07/07/2026for just $19 you may have a beautiful $19 salad 1120
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 02/07/2026there was a ladybug on my luggage and I saw it before it went through the x ray at TSA and it went through the x ray and then I was gonna take a pic (slow line it was okay) and then it flew away but that ladybug got x rayed and not a lot of them could say that. wonder what TSA saw 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 28/06/2026David Duchovny in his old age looks like the good guy version of Bill Maher. 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 25/06/2026title for an inspirational movie: the last rizz of the white man 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 25/06/2026picture this, a spider web full of flies built between two sticks. the sticks are wound together to form the shape of a chicken drumstick. silken, delicate, delicious. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 19/06/2026just got a fat raise so I’m heading to the Facebook marketplace 🫡 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 18/06/2026I just want to be beautiful and androgynous like any moral person would 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 15/06/2026wiring my synth to play it with box cutters and needles to play a cute song for a tiktok 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 29/05/2026be careful about which vocal stims you impart upon your friends 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 29/05/2026every t shirt is a beautiful snowflake 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 25/05/2026I think we can all agree that the keurig, with its fart sounds and plastic waste, is the superior method of coffee brewing. 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 22/05/2026if I’m leaving a comment on something, it’s probably like “hell yeah” or maybe a “this rocks” but that’s as far as I’ll go 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 11/05/2026I find it very easy to count atoms, but very hard to know when I’m finished 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 11/05/2026once as a child I actually performed a kamehameha wave but sadly no one was around to see it. this has been my sole regret in life. 110
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 11/05/2026I have levels of virtue so high that most can hardly comprehend 😔 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 04/05/2026goatees are only worn by evil twins or evil doppelgängers from alternate universes. remember that when encountering those with goatees in your day to day life. do not let your guard down. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 01/05/2026a sk-sk-sk-sk- sk-sk-sk-sk head bone! me when I see a skull 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 01/05/2026U2? more like no1, cuz that’s who likes those guys. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 27/04/2026if you’ve ever called me a worm, you’re the reason why birds attacked me in the park yesterday. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 27/04/2026I have become the first person to reach to the bottom of the ocean, only to discover even more ocean below that. proving my double ocean theory correct. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 25/04/2026going to the simfunny tonight. seeing the quire perform. excited for the orkerstraw. clacicle music is my favorite jenner. 000
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 23/04/2026I like to watch the street sweeper whenever they drive around the neighborhood and I wonder if they also look for me watching them, half tucked behind my curtains. it’s honestly a little romantic. 100
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 22/04/2026when two people call each other at the same time it’s like their phones are kissing. that’s what the busy signal means 010
copenhagen_cool_ranch @jasonalexhamstr.bsky.social · 21/04/2026slathering my salad in ranch: put yr dress on 010
