iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Yesterday I told a girl I would crawl over broken glad to get to her. She invited me to get coffee at 7:15AM. 7:15AM? I asked her if she was sure there wasn’t just some broken glass I could crawl over instead.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Terrible costume design. She doesn’t look like a mummy at all.

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internetgeorge.bsky.social @internetgeorge.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

let’s go back to cloning. Cloning was sick. Let’s pause this and go back to cloning.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Kitchen hack: when making a sandwich, instead of dirtying a knife, just spread your mayo by rubbing the bread slices together. This one small change will save you an average of 500 hours and $6000 per year on dishwashing costs.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

i went to school for 4 years to become a graphic designer who makes uncanny valley portraits that are very close to photorealistic but upon closer inspection have disturbing errors that cause a subtle and confusing feeling of disgust and ruin the whole thing. now ai has taken my job what am i to do

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Cezary Jan Strusiewicz @ostrichson.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Woke has gone too far. You can't even say "Merry Christmas" anymore. People are all like "It's August." Goddamn atheists. This is not the world I died in Vietnam for.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

Me: Everyone meet Penelope, my first wife Penelope: I wish you would quit introducing me like that. We’re still married now.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

My birthday is 9/15. You know how folks who have a birthday around Xmas complain that sometimes people give them one present for their birthday AND for Xmas? Well that’s what they do to me with my September birthday. They give me ONE present for my birthday and for 9/11. WHERE IS MY 9/11 PRESENT?

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

I always worry that my emails aren’t clear enough, so to ensure clarity, I always end with all caps “DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!”

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

And I would never allow him an English scone with strawberry Jane because I am a responsible pet owner but dang, he would beg for it and it would be cute

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

I have two dogs, and one of them is named Freddie. We call him Mister Freddie because, although he was out of control as a puppy, he has learned to be a little gentleman. Now, he wears a bowtie on his collar to show for it.

Little black and grey terrier mutt mix with out of control wiry hair wearing a little blue and white checkered bow tie on his collar and standing at attention

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 11/07/2026

So you are saying you are too good for online hotdog debates?

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 20/06/2025

Do you remember who the mayor is in Jaws 2? IT’S THE SAME MAYOR FROM JAWS 1! THEY RE-ELECTED THE GUY WHO WOULDN’T SHUT DOWN THE BEACHES IN JAWS 1! My point is, local elections matter.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

We all try to use alt text because even though most people are not visually impaired, some people are. I would like a norm that we try to be proactively kind online, even when we don’t like a stranger’s post, bc some of us are mentally unstable and go to very dark places when people are mad at us.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

As soon as I get my paycheck I spend a bunch of money while I can, because later in the month it seems like I’m always out of money.

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

Thanks for defining myriad for me. It means a lot.

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lottie "frog k" lovely ⚧️🏴‍☠️ @vaporlight.bsky.social · 18/06/2026

now there's nowhere left to hide you son of a bitch

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 19/06/2026

Since I’ve been chronically ill and too nauseous to eat for a couple of months I’m not that fat any more! Only a little fat! Lookin’ good! 🤢

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 08/06/2026

They always focus on the one time you messed up, and not the hundreds of times you drove drunk no problem and DIDN’T crash into the Wendy’s drive-thru menu

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 07/06/2026

The only “data centers” we should be building are children’s curious young minds. Picture it: enormous child brains the size of cities sucking up water and energy and turning it into profit. I’m gonna be rich.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 02/06/2026

I don’t appreciate negative depictions of pirates in the media. My uncle was a pirate and yes he did have a peg leg and an eye patch. He mostly pirated movies from the internet. The leg and the eye were complications from untreated diabetes.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 31/05/2026

Uber but for going to the bathroom for me when I really have to go but I’m comfy

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 28/05/2026

The TV shows I watch have me very worried that I will one day wake up next to a dead girl. If this happens, I’m telling you now, it wasn’t me. Please believe me, I’m afraid I won’t be able to make friends in prison.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 25/05/2026

Just because I am young and dumb does NOT automatically mean I am full of cum. That’s a harmful stereotype.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 21/05/2026

I was born in the wrong century. Like I should have been born in Ancient Rome and been really rich and had naked girls feeding me grapes. Or like, born now but also really rich and had naked girls handing me touchscreen tablets. I guess I mean I was born with the wrong amount of money & naked girls.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 18/05/2026

Now to clean my wedding ring over the kitchen sink. And to save time, I’ll clean some plates into the disposal, currently turned on, while I’m at it.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 05/04/2026

The title of the song “It’s Raining Men” is just a metaphor. In the situation the song is describing, it’s not literally raining men, it’s just raining really hard. Like saying, “it’s raining cats and dogs.” So next time you are caught in a storm, try saying, “it’s raining men!”

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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 02/01/2026

apparently they kicked me out of philosophy class, i didn’t ask why

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J. L. Westover @mrlovenstein.bsky.social · 15/12/2025

me: I would die for you friend: would you give me a ride to the airport? me: ...would you rather I die for you instead? friend: no, the ride is enough me: I'd prefer the other option if possible

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 01/12/2025

I teach my children NEVER to lie. Unless you’ve already lied and further lies are the only way to cover your tracks.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 12/10/2025

“Is Portland a crime ridden hellscape? According to liars, the answer is yes.”

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 02/09/2025

My wife is mad at me because she walked in on me masturbating, which is completely unreasonable. Masturbation is totally normal. And also you shouldn’t just barge in on someone without knocking when they are in the kitchen.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 30/08/2025

I’m tired of people assuming family is about who you are related to by blood, instead of who you love. All families are different. And if my child’s birth parents were so great, then why was it so easy for me to kidnap her?

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 29/08/2025

Did you know that in the palace of Versailles, where French kings and queens lived and held court, people would just pee wherever on the walls, like inside? That’s a true fact. When I learned this, it caused a “Eureka!” moment for me that was the beginning of the end of my marriage.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 12/08/2025

Are you mad at me? Everyone who sees this post please comment below ⬇️ whether or not you are mad at me. If you choose not to reply, no worries, I will just continue to assume you are mad at me.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 11/08/2025

Hold on I have to go to the bathroom. Nobody do any funny posts until I get back, I don’t want to miss any good ones.

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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 11/08/2025

Goldfish 1: knock knock Goldfish 2: who's there Goldfish 1: who's where Goldfish 2: what

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Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

I NEVER sit with my back to a door, I ALWAYS open carry when walking my dog off leash, I ONLY wear jorts that fall below the knee, and I WILL marry your sister for just over six months. Oh and our registry has a deepfake nude poster of Jessica Alba from Sin City. If you haven't bought anything yet.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

One small upside to having one of your eyeballs ripped out by a hawk and having to wear an eyepatch for the rest of your life is you could do a really good wink at the ladies. You’d just blink and it would look like a perfect wink because your other eye would be covered by an eyepatch.

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 14/07/2025

Do NOT raise (or lower) the roof. Keep all roofs where they are. They were put at that particular height for a perfectly good reason I’m sure.

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Disco Gnostic @mazov.bsky.social · 13/07/2025

Got damn

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 07/07/2025

Challenged a guy to a fight at a bar to impress a lady I had met and fallen in love with minutes before but I stood up too fast off the bar stool and got all woozy for a second from low blood pressure and spilled my drink on my pants so it looked like I peed my pants

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Brady Klopfer @bradyklopfer.bsky.social · 26/06/2025

11/10 social media work by the Durham Bulls

Tweet from the Durham Bulls that reads "Y'all means all. #PrideNight"

Tweet from a user saying "Please delete," and Durham Bulls responding "No."

Tweet from a user saying, "Actually, no it does not! Stop dividing people." with a response from the Durham Bulls saying, "Inclusion's actually the exact opposite of division"

Tweet from someone saying "Maybe don't promote gay sex to children?" with the Durham Bulls responding, "Okay, sexyman159861581242902587231848675309"

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 20/06/2025

Is anybody actually turning off their cell phone when they pump gas? Like nobody does that and gas stations don’t appear to be blowing up, so can we even trust signs anymore?

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Hiding in the Attic @hidingintheattic.bsky.social · 20/06/2025

Everything Trump is doing is just a distraction from everything else Trump is doing. Quit getting distracted Democrats! Stay focused on everything!

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