Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 12/09/2026Don’t let your child eat batteries. DROP A BRICK ON THEIR FUCKIN HEAD INSTEAD 2141
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 29/07/2026Would yall subscribe to my Podcast where it videos all of my daily interactions inside and outside of the office and also I don’t record any of it or post it at all? Would that earn your Smash? 020
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 18/07/2026The homogeneity of professional golf is getting out of hand 090
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 18/07/2026The opposite of Warsaw is Peacehammer ..and THAT’S my contribution to the world today 081
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 15/07/2026Oh, Cluttr’d Desktop, You started so fresh, so clean Still there’s room for More. 030
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 09/07/2026Sometimes you gotta put me in a slot canyon during monsoon season and just see what happens. The larger danger is working in an office. 0101
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 04/06/2026If unflavored sparkling/mineral water turns out to be bad for us i am, as parenthetically stated by the Athenians, absolutely fucked. 060
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 03/06/2026All due respect to NASCAR, but fuck left turns, like, in general. 1111
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 21/05/2026Dog walk: 45 minutes total 8 minutes walk time 37 minutes struggling to open the dog poop plastic bag Am I the only one who has this problem? 280
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 19/05/2026Might f around and become John Prine * blew up my tv * Threw away my paper * Moved to the country * Built me a home * Planted a little garden * Ate a lot of peaches * Tried to find jesus on my own (in progress, haven’t checked the crawlspace yet) 1182
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 23/04/2026Your mouth says, “I don’t use AI to write my resume.” But your resume, your actual resume, says… 0102
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 20/04/2026Not to brag but I was just alphabetizing a stack of papers and I gotta say, I am really good at knowing where the letters are and which ones come before others 040
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 01/04/2026You had me at “we found a donor for your failing heart,” but you lost me at “please take a few short moments to complete a brief survey” 010
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 26/02/2026I think the Idris Elba Hijack show is not very good but the intro music absolutely goddamned slaps 230
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 25/02/2026Adobe Acrobat being condescending as hell with me. Only Clippy is allowed to speak to me in that manner, and that fucker is on thin ice after what he did to my family 0100
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 23/02/2026iPhone: Software update 67.594.7 is available. It will install later tonight when the device is charged and connected to WiFi Me (the next morning): you didn’t do it iPhone: I KNOW RIGHT Me: why? iPhone: Me: iPhone: I’ll do it tonight, I promise 612115
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 26/01/2026In the Old West, there were only 2 options for helping a loved one get sober. 080
Reposted by GregYgrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 03/01/2026[God creating dogs] Oh these turned out great. Im going to want all of these back at some point 191168192
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 06/01/2026Who let Joey Chestnut on the Board of Directors at WHOOP? 040
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 03/01/2026Just when I try to stop snack, they come out with even more snack, better snack 1212
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 28/12/2025*makes millions* *buys Nissan Juke* *drives it into the ocean* *walks back to dealership* *buys Nissan Juke* *drives it into the ocean* *wal 041
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 03/12/2025I just want to be wealthy enough to have a loggia. Don’t care whether it is attached to a house or attached to a Robert. 150
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 13/11/2025SKATEPARK: Yay, $1.8 million in donations to build me! PRINCIPAL: You know what…fuck this shit, I quit. 050
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 04/11/2025It’s a bag of chips, not my aunt carol’s goddamned recipe blog intro 070
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 03/11/2025All I want for Christmas is $2,800 and for Willie Nelson to sing “C is for Cookie” from Sesame Street. 060
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 16/10/2025She’s a perfect fit for the job but I can’t do anything about it. 1122
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 06/10/2025The idea of broth seeping lazily and unchecked through the farmland has sent me into deep hypnosis 2222
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 06/10/2025It is supposed to be our special night. A grand romantic gesture. It takes me over an hour to light all the candles. My god there are so many. It is now 300 degrees in your bedroom. My desperate attempts to keep wax off your dresser further kill the mood. Love has left your eyes. 0103
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 05/10/2025What if, as a hilarious joke, I was able to sleep until my alarm went off 170
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 05/10/2025I still play Words With Friends (not ashamed) and hoooo boy do I get the feeling that the overwhelming majority of my opponents have highly problematic, uh, worldviews quite different from my own. Wild. 170
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 24/09/2025If the gates really are pearly you gotta worry about the other design choices within. 070
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 21/09/2025One cool thing that happened we were watching Portlandia the other day and discovered that we stayed in a cool Airbnb where they shot some scenes 050
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 20/09/2025real talk does this spider have 9 legs or do i not understand how numbers work ? 5212
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 17/09/2025Townes Van Zandt just made an appearance in my daughter’s Spotify DJ playlist and I’ve never known joy like this, it proves I did an minimum of 1 (one) parenting correct. 030
Greg @growlygrego.bsky.social · 15/09/2025New on Netflix UNTOLD: I Can’t Stop Eating Ginger Snaps (The Rise and Fall of GrowlyGrego) 040
Reposted by Gregsky @iamspacegirl.bsky.social · 22/06/2023I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second. 643262607
