Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 02/04/2026I just learned that Kid Rock lives in a miniature replica of the White House and I just wonder if it includes the ballroom 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 01/04/2026I be thinking up jokes and apologies at the same time 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 28/12/2025When my bf says "miss your face" I do feel that it's a little disrespectful to my tits & ass 010
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 07/12/2025Catch me in the barnes and noble coffee shop flexing my library book 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 03/12/2025Imagine surviving the apocalypse and then getting stuck with someone who started prepping in, like, 2020 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 23/10/2025Laughing all the way to the bank; crying all the way from the bank 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 23/10/2025The economy: *in shambles* Me, spending my last $6 on mozzarella sticks: hope this helps :) 010
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 22/10/2025Broke but happy does NOT mean happy about being broke 010
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 20/10/2025I, I took the road less traveled by, and I gotta say this road SUCKS 081
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 20/10/2025Listen. This ain't my first rodeo, nor indeed my first time riding this horse specifically 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 18/10/2025Girl you have done it again ! Constantly lowering the bar for us all ! And doing it flawlessly ! 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 17/10/2025Mfs will follow the most heinous turn of phrase with "if you will." No, my brother, I will not.... 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 11/10/2025I'm back on the market boys! Everyone form a single file line 120
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 15/09/2025I heard eating sour helps with anxiety and let me tell you I've got EVERYTHING riding on these gummy worms 000
Reposted by Elyse Joseph🅱️oofessor Killosk 👻🔪 @professorkiosk.wtf · 09/09/2025if I make it to 69 y'all better say nice 811938
Reposted by Elyse JosephMrCarter3 @mrcarter3.bsky.social · 10/09/2025I'm not sure my body can handle much more of this "getting out of bed" nonsense 1357
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 09/09/2025I had no idea that galumph was a real word until today. I thought that was just Lewis Carroll dicking around 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 21/08/2025Headed to the dentist for a quick bells palsy speedrun 010
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 17/08/2025Man, I was born 2 whole weeks late. I didn't wanna be here frl 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 11/07/2025Having friends on socials isn't enough anymore. I need foes 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 02/07/2025I consider myself California spiritual. I don't do religion, but every once in a while I do see god in the trees 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 16/06/2025Damn, do I need to put the talc in the setting powder myself?? 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 08/06/2025U know the chip is crispy when u get a shard of it stuck in your gums 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 05/06/2025I just went shopping with my second paycheck at a new job. This next outfit y'all see me in bout to be crazy. 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 05/06/2025Am I going to have to buy the fucking talc and put it in the powders myself? 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 21/05/2025I never see enough love for the Pentel R.S.V.P. line (I use the fine ones), and its actually making me really sad. 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 17/05/2025One thing I don't like is when people use the closed parenthesis in a :) as the closed parenthesis in a parenthetical 😒 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 22/04/2025I once saw a man try to scan a QR code with his phone's front camera. Where is the registry for this? 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 30/03/2025Do u guys think Ben Shapiros lip fillers will migrate back for summer? 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 26/02/2025I can take a joke. What I can't handle is a serious 010
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 25/02/2025I've never encountered a bra strap that stays on my shoulder 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 24/02/2025Damn.... Sometimes my deepest fear really do be that I am powerful beyond measure.... 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 15/02/2025Sometimes u gotta pop out (cry) and show (in front of your coworkers) 010
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 15/02/2025Every Friday night I fuck up my sleep schedule, that way I have something to do all weekend 010
Reposted by Elyse JosephLaura Knetzger @lauraknetzger.bsky.social · 13/02/2025Hey guys meta announced a new policy where they send a killer to get you so be sure to go to settings>my account > killer> disable killer to turn that off 5268548012
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 02/02/2025We're about to make the Depression great again fr 000
Elyse Joseph @elysejoseph.bsky.social · 29/01/2025Gonna start sleeping with a loaded gun under my pillow so I can shoot the bulb any time I don't feel like getting up to turn the light off 021
