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duncan gates

@duncangates.bsky.social
395 followers 67 following 49K posts

Yale Drama shortlist (2024); Verity Bargate longlist (2022, 2017, 2013); Bruntwood longlist (2013); Papatango longlist (2022, 2017) rep: Steinberg Assoc duncan-gates.com

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Reposted by duncan gates
duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 02/10/2021
30. Mr Steinway (TG) - We’ll be seeing a lot of Torture Garden early doors, and its absolute nadir is a piano being so consumed by sexual jealousy that it sort-of moves about and goes off-key. Probably decent if you own a haunted incel piano. #AmicusHalloweenCountdown
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Reposted by duncan gates
duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 01/10/2021
So without further ado: 31. Lucy Comes To Stay (As) - Epicly trite ‘split personality’ mental-health-stigma trash. Britt Ekland is many things, but she is not convincing as a malign psychological influence. #AmicusHalloweenCountdown
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Reposted by duncan gates
duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 01/10/2021
The films: Dr Terror’s House of Horrors, 1965 (DTHOH) Torture Garden, 1967 (TG) The House That Dripped Blood, 1971 (THTDB) Tales From The Crypt, 1972 (TFTC) Asylum, 1972 (As) Vault Of Horror, 1973 (VOH) From Beyond The Grave, 1974 (FBTG) #AmicusHalloweenCountdown
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 9h
Worth resurrecting this five years on, still very happy with it
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
all american urban geography is this, nothing in between: New Capitolia is a city of over 11m people... Horselip is a city of 7300 people... Cleb's Gusset is an unincorporated community of 11.3 people covering 18 square miles...
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
That was Life
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Blokehawke
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
if i could go back in time and change one thing, i'd swap the pills over in The Matrix, so incels became known as 'bloopers'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I have been in the room where a little bit of @hookland.bsky.social appened Thank you @cultauthor.bsky.social @treadwells-books.bsky.social
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Catford.
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
i keep thinking 'Earl Spencer' is his actual name, and that he's a deputy sheriff
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
losing it more than i should at this image of Stanislaus of Szczepanów just about to get martyred by Bolesław II of Poland
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
i hope the bell-ringer is ok, because this is a lifetime contribution to farce thechelseacitizen.com/bell-ringer-...
thechelseacitizen.com
Bell ringer injured in shocking “freak accident” in the belfry at St Luke’s | The Chelsea Citizen
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
London's addiction problem reaches new lows
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
'Piddington' is exactly what you'd call a fictional racist village
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
masts on the SS Richard Montgomery being removed today, best of luck to those around the Thames Estuary
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
hell of a time to be Lizzie Loveridge
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
just got a new work laptop and good to see there's a dedicated 'NO SKAG' button
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
no disrespect to Gainsborough Trinity, but imposters ain't what they used to be www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
bbc.co.uk
Gainsborough Trinity condemn person claiming to be manager Russ Wilcox
Gainsborough Trinity condemn a person who has been approaching players while falsely claiming to be their manager.
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
now this is FUN www.sciencealert.com/antique-fox-...
sciencealert.com
Antique 'Fox Head' Bought at Auction Wasn't a Fox at All. It Was a Long-Extinct Species.
With its googly eyes, lumpy forehead, and awkward almost-smile, the strange, taxidermied fox head at the antique market was funny enough to throw down 50 quid on.  When the buyer later sold it at auct...
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
'...whenever they kvetch you, they will kill you. But first they must kvetch you...'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
if you would like a weird late-90s British TV action vibe, I recommend CI5: The New Professionals, which at its best is more like the Avengers than the original Professionals it also contains this incredibly niche Peter Cook reference for the benefit of... presumably someone?
IMDB listing for a character named Strieb-Griebling, played by Peter Krummeck in the CI5 New Professional episode 'Samurai Wind'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Sensational concept for an undertakers in Grange-over-Sands, I'm devastated they've closed
An 18th/19th century shop-front with defunct signage reading 'Aladdin's Cave Funerals and Memorials'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
for some reason i've only just got around to watching National Treasure, and i'm in awe of its determination to be Dee's mental illness story, vs the entirety of what the show was and continues to be sold as
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
UK train carriages have no maximum capacity.
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
First they came for the small boats, But they could not find the small boats as they were illicit (and small), Then they came for the P&O Ferries, Which are a lot easier to identify, Albeit that raised questions about tactics and logic www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
bbc.co.uk
Masked protesters block access at Port of Dover
Masked protesters are preventing traffic from going in and out of the Port of Dover.
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
'Obviously we don't have a favourite toilet, but since you ask...'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
The UK transfer record is back where it belongs: the country's two least popular clubs bartering over a personally unlikeable player
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
how has nobody in Gulf tourism come up with 'You can do it, when you be in Kuwait'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
'Wouldst thou like to live cautiously?'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
it's what he'd have wanted www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
bbc.co.uk
Right-wing commentator Milo Yiannopoulos detained by ICE
The British citizen, who lives and works in the US, has supported Trump and ICE agents in the past.
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
🎶 In these sour times, You've got to put up with anything, In these sour times, You mustn't pick and choose, Cause nobody loves me yes it's true, Nobody loves me just like you, Nobody loves me like you do, In these sour times! 🎶
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
i bet dwarf farts are *horrendous*
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
he finally escaped to the one place that hasn't been corrupted by capitalism
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Please don't take her just because you can
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
Octopuses don't have accidents because they're careful-opods
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Strong
A sticker depicting a red-eyed black demon  dog, carrying a Pride flag. Above and below is the legend 'GAY AS SHUCK'.
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
'Sadie Sink' is a name you give to a sink
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
One Night Only is basically The Purge with shagging, and somehow nobody called it 'The Urge'???? the Black List is a fucking scam
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Several months into my new flat and I find this handy claw/blade testing board, neat
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
🎶 Play time For Plato and ancient Greece 🎶
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Doggoes: grammatically and pronounicationally correct, also reads like Olde Englishe Doggos: The ancient Greek god of dogs, to whom you give homage and tribute for being the bestest boy on Mount Olympus
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
how did i never know 'shandy' was short for the vastly superior 'shandygaff'
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Reposted by duncan gates
Aparna Nair @disabilitystor1.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
its worth asking whether this ending would have happened without the endless, gleeful, hunting and dismantling of Arday's choices on Twitter, where he represented all the sins of DEI made flesh for a range of assorted disgruntled academics who once had to go to a training and hated it
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
'I am very serious about the climate crisis but that climate crisis-related emergency message was shrill and unnecessary, and will only drive people to have more barbecues'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
@tommortonsmith.com @danrebellato.bsky.social you'll both enjoy this
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Yeeaahh that's some good peerin'
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Quite fun in itself
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
we should've started a rumour that you can tap the side of Meta glasses and say 'ECLIPSE MODE', never have another chance to blind so many idiots
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duncan gates @duncangates.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
actual evidence only goes so far, but still socialecology.uci.edu/news/large-s...
socialecology.uci.edu
Large-scale study finds no link between crime and unauthorized immigration | School of Social Ecology
Research team analyzed 11,500 neighborhoods over a decade
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