johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 14hThe Road by cormac mcarthy but they have to eat everything they touch 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 27/09/2026i begin every chatgpt request with "how might a handsome fellow like me, and his hideous assistant (you)," 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 27/09/2026i would kill to be wearing a damp shirt at all times 000
Reposted by johnny deformedAncient Egyptian Prayer Bot @egyptianprayerbot.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Hail to you and praise to Re! The heads of the Children of Impotence have been removed. (BDF) 021
Reposted by johnny deformedjohnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 22/09/2026edited for brevity and reuse 011
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 22/09/2026the primary benefit of money (cash, or 'dollars' to some) is getting nice things for people you care about 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 21/09/2026i will call you gungabelle. and the boy, gungabello. he will be a burden to you, but his simplemindedness will provide much needed levity 000
Reposted by johnny deformedcb @crannyboy.bsky.social · 17/09/2026Hey I just met you and this is crazy but I'm going to jump over you right now I'm going to leap over your head from a standing position do not move 17413
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 16/09/2026when ed next takes to the stage - september 19th - he will execute phase II of his plan: self-immolation in solidarity with palestine. macklemore will return in phase III 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 15/09/2026NEW FROM NETFLIX: GUANTANAMO BABES ZERO DARK FLIRTY MKULTRADELUXE 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 15/09/2026rachel dolezal be like yeah, i'm thinking i'm black 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 14/09/2026you gotta break a few omelettes to make what I call Rudy's breakfast tornado 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 11/09/2026they should do outtakes for conversations where you get to say all the things you thought of but couldn't find an opening 001
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 10/09/2026my uterus operates on a first cum first served basis 000
Reposted by johnny deformedjohnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 03/07/2026INT: ROGER STERLING'S OFFICE - DAY ROGER: Think that hygienist'll let me jack off on laughing gas? I'm trying to jack off on every drug. JOAN: You've harassed me for the last time 001
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 04/09/2026yes i do have to play my mobile game at full volume sitting next to you, paging doctor idiot they need more stupid questions on level two, get the fuck away from me 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 03/09/2026I'm playing through the PS2 GTA trilogy and you can feel the games slowly shifting into Rockstar's current realism ethos. GTA III was like an arcade game in many ways, something it seems Rockstar would be embarrassed to release today? 120
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 31/08/2026(be playing gta, driving on the sidewalk, pedestrians flyin over the hood of my car) me: Heheh suckers gf, shocked, blushing, smiling: Johnny... 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 30/08/2026getting a house built and standing around with the builders saying "make it like they used to" 010
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 24/08/2026dudes jumping off the parthenon when the age of bronze collapses like it's the wall st crash 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 23/08/2026she inherited a million bugs and when she died they came to me i cant help it if im lucky 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 20/08/2026[officiating my own wedding] by the power vested in me, i may kiss the bride 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 15/08/2026If my dad was brian thompson I'd kill him first 031
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 12/08/2026I get a notification when you log on thinking of me 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 11/08/2026Pistachios by johnny deformed in 3:46 | SHELLS IN SAME BOWL | ALL NUTS | GLITCHLESS 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 05/08/2026is this why they care so much about this odyssey business 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 01/08/2026JOSH O'CONNOR boards a train, fumbling with bags and a LARGE STANDING FAN. He plops into a seat. A MAN nods to him with a smile. JOSH politely nods with some discomfort, arranging his things. The man continues smiling JOSH's way. MAN Big fan. 011
Reposted by johnny deformedjohnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 03/07/2026jerry you got any brains in the fridge *crowd cheers* kramer you're getting tar all over the wallpaper! *laughter* who is that half eaten in the hallway - is that my doorman? *laughter* he smelled so tasty! *laughter; applause* 001
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 26/07/2026i dont know who needs to hear this but your son has locked his jaw on my midsection 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 20/07/2026the bible dosent even say who was jesuss uncle. how can it be trusted 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 15/07/2026they should let the world cup be a draw and they all go out for a beer afterwards and the real prize is they saved the clubhouse 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 15/07/2026swallowing a tapeworm so the diarrhea worm has nothing to diarrhee 000
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 13/07/2026Sam Neill was the platonic ideal of a pākeha new zealander. Massively proud he came from our little island. 001
johnny deformed @dewormed.bsky.social · 12/07/2026my wife is quitting social media, and i said, 'how will you know what bedridden imbeciles on the internet think?' And she started to tear up 000
