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AJH

@derision.bsky.social
54 followers 115 following 18 posts

Writer. Demo coder. Dog-haver. Unreliable narrator. Giant idiot. He/him. ajheller.substack.com

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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
In case anyone is still wondering how much of this was true and how much was just a fever dream I had once… I present to you a selection from my Visual Voicemail: ajheller.substack.com/p/the-ballad...
A screenshot of a Visual Voicemail in which all the voicemails are debt collectors looking for people named Kevin or Amy.
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Biting into a raisin cookie you thought was chocolate chip is like being stabbed by someone you love
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
I own a Taco Bell spork autographed by Lou Rawls. That is, somehow, the least strange thing about the week I acquired it. ajheller.substack.com/p/a-republic...
ajheller.substack.com
A Republic of Jurors
I own a Taco Bell spork autographed by Lou Rawls. This is the least strange thing about the week I acquired it.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
America is very proud of being old, which is adorable because it's not. That's... not at all what this is about.
ajheller.substack.com
My Contribution to the Semiquincentennial
America is very proud of being old, which is adorable because it's not. That's not what this is about, though.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
I stopped for a cat in the road. Naturally, this became a whole thing.
ajheller.substack.com
The Tenure of a Cat
I stopped for a cat in the road. Naturally, this became a whole thing.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 01/05/2026
I offered a stranger my shopping cart. I'm still recovering.
ajheller.substack.com
A Brief Marriage in Produce
I offered a stranger my shopping cart in the dairy aisle. I am still recovering.
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The Onion @theonion.com · 13/04/2026
Man Who Threw Molotov Cocktail At Sam Altman’s Home Claims He Was Following ChatGPT Recipe For Risotto theonion.com/man-who-threw-molotov-…
Man Who Threw Molotov Cocktail At Sam Altman’s Home Claims He Was Following ChatGPT Recipe For Risotto
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 01/04/2026
Two strangers have been giving out my phone number for over a decade. I would like them to stop. ajheller.substack.com/p/the-ballad...
ajheller.substack.com
The Ballad of Kevin and Amy
Two strangers have been giving out my phone number for over a decade. I would like them to stop.
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Ryan Boyd @ryanboyd.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
I'm a bitch / I'm a lover / Beowulf killed Grendel's mother
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
I was stuck in a room with my thoughts for an unknowable period of time. Nobody should ever let that happen. ajheller.substack.com/p/conversati...
ajheller.substack.com
Conversation in Beige
I was stuck in a room with my thoughts for an unknowable period of time. Nobody should have let that happen.
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Robert Evans (the Only Robert Evans) @iwriteok.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
shockingly people are capable of simultaneously, 1. Hating their government 2. Hating the people who bomb and sanction their country, making regular life impossible and murdering members of their family, even more
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
I turned 47. The internet had thoughts about what that meant. This is my formal complaint.
open.substack.com
The Age of Personal Indignities
I turned 47. The internet had to go and make it weird.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 02/02/2026
I wrote something about modern isolation, from inside my house, where I am absolutely fine. Also, there's a van with a wizard on it.
open.substack.com
A Neighborhood of Strangers
We exist in a constant, low-grade hum of social presence, but actual interaction has become something we do at a distance.
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✨🥀Persephone🥀✨ @bipolarpisces35.blacksky.app · 03/01/2026
Being an American feels like getting on a school bus and then your bus driver decides to do a drive by
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 03/01/2026
Honestly, the most unrealistic thing in five seasons of Stranger Things is that there's only one "Mike" or "Steve" in that friend group.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 02/01/2026
This started as a small thought about AI. It didn't stay that way.
open.substack.com
A Heart Built of Error Messages
AI thinks that I should start using AI. I disagree.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 20/12/2025
The Christmas music situation escalated. I assume I’m not the only one who noticed.
open.substack.com
An Inadvisable Quantity of Christmas Music
Please, someone just turn off the Christmas music.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 02/12/2025
Hey, I'm on Substack now, too. Because it's 2025 and... you kind of have to be? I'll be attempting my usual nonsense on a monthly basis (maybe more, depending on how stupid things get). open.substack.com/pub/ajheller...
open.substack.com
A Betrayal of Potatoes
I would like to enjoy an occasional baked potato.
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 30/11/2025
Wow. Been a while. Nice to know I'm still capable of extravagant complaining. Let's do this more often. justwestofhell.blog/2025/11/29/a...
justwestofhell.blog
A Betrayal of Potatoes
I would like to enjoy an occasional baked potato. Not that I do enjoy them, I merely aspire to. Baked potatoes and I have a complicated relationship, the sort you’d file under “irreconcilable diffe…
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merman1974 @merman1974.bsky.social · 30/10/2025
Had a lot of fun appearing on the Dreamcast Junkyard podcast, discussing homebrew games for the Dreamcast and my regular column in Retro Gamer. thedreamcastjunkyard.buzzsprout.com/42610/episod...
thedreamcastjunkyard.buzzsprout.com
Episode 146: Andrew Fisher, Homebrew Writer for Retro Gamer Magazine - The Dreamcast Junkyard DreamPod
This month on the DreamPod, Lozz and Lewis are joined by freelance video game writer Andrew Fisher to discuss his career and everything Dreamcast homebrew.With decades of experience in video game jour...
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Scene World Magazine @sceneworld.org · 05/07/2025
Podcast Ep.#218 @taylorlorenz.bsky.social is a journalist and opinion columnist who covers a wide range of the current tech and online culture offering her expertise with her independent #UserMagb +her #PowerUser #podcast The interview starts at minute 40:06: scene.world/taylorlorenz #TaylorLorenz
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Natasha @nastynatasha--1.bsky.social · 01/07/2025
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MJ64 🦋 @mj644.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
Just saw this posted on FB and had to share.
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Acyn @acyn.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
Canadian MP Charlie Angus: He choked. The market started to tank, and suddenly, he said, “Oh, didn’t you guys already have a plan to deal with the border back in December? I love that—I’ll take that.” This is Mr. Art of the Deal.
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Some Random Dude @realsrd2020.bsky.social · 19/01/2025
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Audrey Farnsworth @audipenny.bsky.social · 15/01/2025
30+ new jobs match your location preferences and guess what they’re all fucking insane or fake or AI actually wait that’s not true sorry sometimes they’re all three
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Gare Davis @bishonentype.bsky.social · 16/01/2025
I don't love how insane everyone is becoming, it's bad actaully
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Micah @rincewind.run · 15/01/2025
periodically I look around at the state of the internet and the way it is clearly contributing to making the world worse in so many ways, and I think back to dicking around in a computer lab in the early 00s and how full of promise it all felt, and I feel sad it didn't have to be this way
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Billy Bragg @billybragg.bsky.social · 17/11/2024
This is the rallying call that I've needed to hear since November 6th. From Roxane Gay in today's New York Times www.nytimes.com/2024/11/17/o...
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Ben Sears @bensears.bsky.social · 06/11/2024
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AJH @derision.bsky.social · 19/09/2024
Oh, look. Welcome? I'm on Bluesky, I guess... and I'm precariously close to that 10,000,000th position, too.
Next in line.
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