iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

I’m not one to kiss and tell, but let’s just say we were out of the bearded barley. Let’s just say we took the train marked on my father’s map. Let’s just say I wore those shoes and she wore that dress.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

I'd be a pretty bad dog because I actually like getting a little spritz in the face when I misbehave on a hot day.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 18/06/2026

In French, Disclosure Day is called DiscloJour.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 03/06/2026

Clavicle Man, Clavicle Man, Clavicle Man hates Cortisol Man.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 19/04/2026

My favourite part of Train Dreams is when he snores and it sounds like “choo choo.” Anyway, thanks for letting me tweet here.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 06/04/2026

"Dad, what were you like in the '90s?" And it's just pictures of me listening to "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls, wall plastered with posters for the movie City of Angels.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 06/03/2026

You know, you could take up a hobby. Then you wouldn’t be so impressed when you hear an actor spent 3 weeks learning darts or whatever.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 05/03/2026

Damn, she was right. Every day IS a winding road.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 04/03/2026

Why are you feeling cute? You should delete now.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 28/02/2026

sombr is my generation’s Djo.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 20/12/2025

Me when the bar’s about to close:

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 14/12/2025

11 months a year: Eat the rich! December: Eat the roof!

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 07/12/2025

This is what a 38-year-old looked like in 1990.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 06/12/2025

Good for you but I’ll never stop riding in horse carriages.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 26/11/2025

Scrooge: Who is that awakening me on this Christmas Eve?

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 19/11/2025

A lot of people like it when Seal goes “Bay-BAY I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey.” But you know what’s underrated? When Seal goes “But did you know that when it snows…”

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 12/10/2025

To celebrate the life of Diane Keaton I will be wearing pants for the next few months.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 30/09/2025

One thing I love about a 20-slide Instagram carousel is trying to guess where the fuck I am in the middle of it.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 03/09/2025

It’s so pathetic how my friends love the Sopranos cuz it’s like bro the Sopranos wouldn’t like you AT ALL.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 31/08/2025

Hot take: I don't think you should be allowed to use the self-checkout if you're a dumbshit.

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Reposted by Dave Shumka

Stop Podcasting Yourself @stoppodcasting.bsky.social · 15/08/2025

New in the bonus feed! Dave and Graham make the ultimate summer playlist.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 18/07/2025

Me: Fellate a minion? Yes please! Snooty waiter: It’s pronounced filet mignon.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 02/07/2025

Don McLean: Drove my Chevy to the levee… Me (grinning while concealing an enormous levee-drying device): Then what happened?

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 06/06/2025

Just met my girlfriend’s dad for the first time. Considering bragging that I can milk anything with nipples. Hope he doesn’t get my ass on a technicality.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 02/06/2025

Now that we have a Chicago pope, Christmas is gonna have a lot more Dominic the Donkey.

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Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 21/05/2025

If you’re posting a video, you better write “wait for it” on it. Otherwise I might think it’s bad the whole way through instead of mostly bad but good at the end.

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