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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes

@coyotes.bsky.social
2.5K followers 1.2K following 6.8K posts

esports olympian. Lactose tolerant. lead singer of my shower. Costco executive member. The largest pants in the game. coyotes creator (Open species) canis latrans (los angeles transgender) @werewolf.mov 💞 steamcommunity.com/id/001 last.fm/user/001

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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 11h
saw this image on my timeline and was cracking up thinking about the time i asked my first furry friend ever when i was a child if he was a greymuzzle because he was in his 20s and he got lowkey offended 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 15h
my chud son that can’t stop wiggling everywhere at 5000mph
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
that’s it. phone’s ruined
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
The larger the screen is that you’re watching porn on the more perverted and disgusting it feels. It depends on the device in question too.. Any phone size is ok, but once you reach tablet territory it’s evil behavior. gooning on a foldable phone is spiritually depraved as well
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I was worried getting used to the max sized iphone would be weird because a lot of people complain about not being able to use it with one hand because it’s too big. i feel blessed to have big enough hands this isn’t an issue. #ImJackingOff
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Can't believe this blocklist i'm on. you don't even fuck with dragons as much as me. you don't even fuck them like me. fake ass fan
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
forgotten island being a box office failure so far actually fucking sucks man i thought it was pretty good. But then again the most marketing i saw for the movie was furries moralfagging over raww potentially being a teenager months before it came out
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
You can tell people i share the freeway with genuinely think they deserve to live
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
might have found the best vending machine ever
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
by far the best emoji ever created
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
the funny part is i transferred my esim over to it so it removed my service from my old phone, and then it said if i want to transfer data it’s going to take 4 and a half hours. and im going to a music festival. thanks for transferring the esim before telling me this i appreciate it apple
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
finally time for an upgrade 👁️👅👁️
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
dont eat all the popcorn before the movie starts challenge (impossible)
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Being californian and watching people in flyover states complain about gas being $4
static.klipy.com
Squidward Meme: Missing Out While Looking Out Window
ALT: Squidward Meme: Missing Out While Looking Out Window
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
saw a guy smoking a cigarette in a tesla. i didn’t even know you could do that. i thought you could only vape
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
i have poasted too much. there is no more 6.7K posts on my profile. This sucks. this fucking sucks
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Reposted by coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes
Marquis @resurrectedmarquis.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Oh God, it's a real term for a color.
dog dick red
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
if discord wants age verification from me im going to laugh so hard because my account is over 11 years old, and discord TOS says you agree you’re 13 years old when signing up. So based on that information alone i’m already at least 24 years old. When they ask for my ID i’ll upload my gaped ass hole
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Reposted by coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes
★Arcade @arcade.vtubers.social · 23/09/2026
fat girl fall? i gotta help her get back up
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
This is apparently huge discourse on twitter today which is frying me
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
furries: ahhh i can’t Put this animal feature on my animal character because then it’s zoophilia :/ fishmonger from the UK: that’s one beautiful cut of tuna, it’s dog cock red. Like it’s so red like a dog’s fucking penis lmao
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
job that hasn’t called me in for 3 months: Hey can you spend an hour doing a sexual harassment training for the 4th time this year
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
if anyone needs me i’ll be here repeatedly rubbing the one spot on my face i missed while shaving last night
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I was just thinking about that entire plushie drama a while back where that person lost their plushie at a convention and freaked out and people review bombed the hotel and everything And then i remembered this tweet i made and im sitting here dying laughing at my own post holy fuck lmao
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Ammnontet! @bleakvision.info · 22/09/2026
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Thinking about a good friend i lost touch with forever ago. this is one of my fav tweets ever
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Reposted by coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes
duen / niko / miles @riolu.gay · 18/09/2026
ur gonna suck whatever i pull out of the aliexpress boykisser undies
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Having a job where i’m actually treated like a human being is so fucked up man i can’t believe any of this. this is my second week and im in shock lol. Like i lowkey get emotional because i feel like i don’t deserve this after being abused and taken advantage of the past 7 years in my career lol
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
My new job has cold brew on a tap which is so dangerous for a freak like me
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
“Does Wile E Coyote Pass The Harkness Test” – the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
When i was working on multiversus and that news dropped i was going to get on my hands and knees begging for a private screening of it. that movie is worth whatever i was willing to do at the time to see it
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
finally got to see coyote vs acme and i cried so hard at the end, half because anyone made the decision to attempt to shelve the movie. it’s so peak and the amount of people that worked on it that thought for years nobody would get to see their work breaks my heart. but shoutout to ketchup!!!!
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
there was an insane bus crash near me and one of the news choppers reporting on it crashed while live on TV. i just watched the 30 minutes leading up to it and it’s chilling. i dont even watch the news much and recognize her voice. i don’t understand why we don’t use drones for this shit. sad asf
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
My friend asked me if coyotes on osu was me and i was like “no i dont play osu” but then i was like, wait wtf i signed up as coyotes though? And apparently if you don’t play enough someone else can just steal your username. Which to be fair i would’ve already known if i played that dogshit “Game”
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Level up your dash with #macklemore content
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
i had a dream last night that they passed a law in california that every company that wasn't cruelty-free had to label that they were cruel, and some brands were leaning into it like this
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
i didnt even look at the new iphone benchmarks until now. What the fuck do you mean single core performance score is MORE THAN DOUBLE my PC. What the fuck do you mean the multicore performance is identical when i have 16 cores. Stop feeding the apple engineers so much cocaine. This is so fucked
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
computers love me so much they create problems IT has never seen before at my job
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
girl that's dating a weed pipe: nooo babe i love it when you send burning ash down the back of my throat babe it's so cute
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Staring at the grocery bagger as she pets some dude’s oily ass homunculus dog and then immediately touches my groceries
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
whoever originally made the joke about how people will eat ass but not the brown part of a banana was cooking because i’ll bury my face inside an asshole for hours like it’s heaven on earth but the banana i have for lunch is squished and i physically frowned seeing it
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
it’s fine i’ll just kill my self
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
i was saying a few weeks ago to a friend that the summers here have been mild the past 5 years and i think god specifically wanted to troll me and make it the most humid i’ve ever felt in my entire life. i cannot fucking believe how sticky it is outside. We have florida at home
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
me listening to the most dogshit music ever with spotify fullscreen at work
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
it’s my second day at my new job and turning any corner in the building that isn’t by my desk feels like this
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Getting absolutely fucking pissed off and stomping my feet because they named it the iphone duo and not the iphone fold so i cant misread it as iphone foid forever
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
i just did tequila shots with him he paid for, i can’t hate this guy
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
guy at the bar bought a drink for a girl that left and he gave it to me instead, and then he trauma dumped to me about being a veteran and people not respecting him i think every bar has one of these guys. it’s legally mandated
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
i went to knotted cafe and everyone was stuck to you
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coyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotescoyotes @coyotes.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
got laid off directing fortnite in the beginning of the year, now im shooting fortnite at another company where im treated like a human being and paid $10/hr more. But also since i was unemployed epic removed a feature i used constantly, specifically to nerf me
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