jay @clench.bsky.social · 23/09/2026during character creation white guys have to pick a Radiohead song that they always sing at karaoke or to themselves. Creep has been the meta since launch atp but recent developments have made Let Down really rise in usage/pick rate 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 14/08/2026in these divisive times, it's important to remember when we used to see each other as human. here's our Top Ten SEXIEST Nazis In Movies! 010
jay @clench.bsky.social · 14/08/2026Theorycrafting avant-garde, one-word JOI. Open-ended with interpretation varying heavily from person to person. Defenestrate. Ungulate. Lettuce. You figure it out 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 07/08/2026is that a burger in your pocket or are you just hungry to see me 031
Reposted by jaywomen with plort @horrificnaturals.bsky.social · 06/03/2026ACTUALLY , im mad excited for Halloween. I love when there's a month of pure terror and no other months are like that for some reason! No other months are scary. Why Would you ever be scared right now :] 031
jay @clench.bsky.social · 18/07/2026somebody at work asked "would you rather burp bubbles or sneeze glitter" and the vote was nearly even which is absolutely insane to me. one of those is a cute little party trick, a little annoying at most, and the other is like apocalypticly life-ruining. actual coughing baby vs hydrogen bomb choice 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 18/07/2026one of the biggest pains in the ass of waking up super sleep deprived is how my body's like "there's no way you'd willingly do this unless you were ill. you should throw up" and i gotta just thug it out and stack breakfast on toppa that. like i do this every week man keep up. promethean struggle 040
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026THIS GOES OUT to EVERYONE who ever THOUGHT I GAVE A FUCK!!! *holding mic close to chest* i do not deserve your grace... 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026remember kids: hit the pen (weed), and you'll hit the pen (jail) 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026Tootsie roll owl if it was awesome be like how many wipes to get to the center of an epic diap? let's find out... 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026what happens if you have synesthesia then get tinnitus. are you just stuck in like the orange dimension forever 050
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026gunky john lennon be like: I want goo. I want goo so baa-aad babe it's driving me mad 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026nooo!!! noo don't look at my small iron!! *crowd loudly jeering me* hey look at the small iron on this guy's hip! shit's tiny! 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026(cameron winters voice) you're making me feel like there's a dollar in my ass. you're making me feel like I'm in zero dollar class 010
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026esports? I'm in the pussy hitting them gsports brother up top 041
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026being a travelling vagabond and subtly stealing a noble's coinpurse and tossing it in the air a little bit before snatching it once they turn the corner must feel good as fuck 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026gunky underscores be like: slop. me if. you've heard this one before. girls. like us. are gloppin in the glorb. 041
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026if you left me alone in a room with no burger i would leave burger 040
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026if you left me alone in a room with a burger i would leave pregnant 031
jay @clench.bsky.social · 17/07/2026what if instead of pop rocks they made poop rocks and they tasted like shit and farted instead of popped 140
jay @clench.bsky.social · 09/07/2026idk id probably have more to say but its late as hell. my boy leon 'the big L' 'the mass' massey made a solid video on it tho (makes different points than this or at least i think so i havent rewatched it) www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOEX...youtube.comFriendSlop: A Slop EssayYouTube video by Not Leon Massey 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 09/07/2026also AAA is primarily built around public matches/lobbies while friendslop is inherently made to be private/local. making a more goofy game that requires some amount of improv or "playing along" in an anonymous online setting is always gonna suck because of tryhards and whatnot 120
jay @clench.bsky.social · 09/07/2026friendslop doesn't have to do that since most games in the niche aren't meant to hit double-digit playtime. You can throw less serious/competitive/addictive ideas at the wall and still have em stick bc most will stop playing long before it gets tiring 120
jay @clench.bsky.social · 09/07/2026as in if a larger company is making a multiplayer game, they need to consider 'how game will be enjoyed after dozens of hours' in the design phase, which necessitates a more utilitarian, balanced approach that is antithetical to more goofy, bit-like ideas (since repeating jokes can get stale) 120
jay @clench.bsky.social · 09/07/2026uhh kinda difficult to condense into bsky length but i think it has something to do with how AAA games are inherently designed to be things that can be repeatedly experienced for the sake of continuous revenue (which mira sorta mentioned) while friendslop is inherently meant to be sorta disposable 120
jay @clench.bsky.social · 08/07/2026grizzled old man hunching over the bar: i used to be an epic memer... but now... *shoots whiskey* now I'm just a quirk chungus... 050
jay @clench.bsky.social · 07/07/2026hate the phrase "stop me if youve heard this one before" bc ill say it out of habit & my homeboy Omnipotent Jon The All-Seeing One will raise his hand to stop me before ive even started because hes already heard every permutation of ordered syllables possible. like maybe Sam hasn't heard it yet dude 031
jay @clench.bsky.social · 05/07/2026communist bf who doesn't do aftercare bc he doesn't believe in unpaid emotional labor 060
jay @clench.bsky.social · 03/07/2026everybody call me 'effective. Power لُلُصّبُلُلصّبُررً ॣ ॣh ॣ ॣ 冗' the way they freeze up when they see my name 010
jay @clench.bsky.social · 28/06/2026hey, wanna see something cool? take the number 8. now lay it on it's side. you see that, right? that's right: she's sleeping :) 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 28/06/2026john lennon seeing a woman like *beatles accent* ooooh fuck she's heavy. she's heavy as shit. stay calm jonny boy, you can be normal about this. *knuckles whitening* you can be normal about this 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 27/06/2026you say you did that "for shits and giggles". yet here i stand, neither shitting nor giggling 071
jay @clench.bsky.social · 26/06/2026was shadowboxing in the shitter while pissing to further improve my technique in the downtime ( #efficiencymaxxing) but ended up annihilating my medicine cabinet and golden showering all my bathroom tile. send prayers folks the devil beat me today 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 26/06/2026okay, alright, i'm imagining a burger. so what do i - what? those liberals are gonna do WHAT to my burger!? oh no way. *pulls up wrangler jeans* no way no how. 130
jay @clench.bsky.social · 26/06/2026of course everyone should be bisexual you need variety in your diet. eat your peens or whatever 040
Reposted by jayDan @ufovictim.bsky.social · 14/06/2026🚨 Your blokes are doing fuck all! 🚨 Activate your blokes to keep them hearty. 🚨 To activate a bloke, right-click and assign them to a pint. 61290592
jay @clench.bsky.social · 18/06/2026heist movie where one of the heisters notices that a security guard is wearing an autism pin and asks them to explain their hyperfixation so their teammates can sneak past, but ends up getting way too interested in it and misses their cue later. in the credits there's a scene of them on a date 130
jay @clench.bsky.social · 11/06/2026you don't understand the sacrifice. the bonds i burgered to get this far 020
jay @clench.bsky.social · 06/06/2026FUCK words didn't hurt him shittttt that was like my entire strategy. all i have now are these twigs and rocks and shit 020
Reposted by jayLaserP @laserp.bsky.social · 31/05/2026This is like a destructo disk for white people 051
jay @clench.bsky.social · 31/05/2026yo man could I bum a cuddle. *scratches arm* haven't snuggled in like a week 031
jay @clench.bsky.social · 22/05/2026never understand why women ask their cishet boyfriends if they would love them if they were a worm. they wouldn't even love you if you were a human man. HAVING a little wormie is already a dealbreaker you really think they'd cherish you if you WERE one 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 22/05/2026oh my god turn the tv on. it doesn't matter what channel. they let the dogs out 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 22/05/2026*hands you two tablets, one showing RateYourMarriage and the other showing RateYourParents, both on the "Divorce" page* we're gonna need you to take accountability here 030
jay @clench.bsky.social · 22/05/2026oh geez. *sighs* yeah, im checking your RateYourEmployee page, and while you're still looking alright, i can't help but notice that your wife was recently fired for disorderly conduct. paired with your mother, and her psychotic break listing... we can't have that toxicity rubbing off on our staff. 030