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The Birdbassador

@Birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy

438 followers 3 following 722 posts

enthusiast of things you like, detester of the things you don't like, but not in a mean way so i don't seem off-putting. just generally a solid follow [bridged from jorts.horse/@Birdbassador on the fediverse by fed.brid.gy ]

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 35m

video games can be divided into five overlapping eras of annoying game mechanics: 1. the insert coin to continue era 2. the you've run out of lives, enter checkpoint code era 3. the collect all 100 coconuts to unlock the secret level era 4. the you have unassigned talent points in your skill […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 07/10/2026

i am a co-author on a paper that's about explainable AI (the paper is mostly about how it doesn't work). it was a huge pain to get it accepted for various reasons (including "we sort of assumed reviewers would read and understand multiple papers not in their field") but now even after it is […]

Original post on jorts.horse

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 06/10/2026

i think there is an assumption of a conversation of assery w/r/t labor. that is, that if you half-ass two things, it is the same productivity as if you whole-assed one thing. but this principles excludes both non-elastic administrative overhead and the stress of having multiple things to […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 04/10/2026

image of that ridiculous my9albums engagement bait where you're supposed to put the 9 albums that are "the sound that made me" but i have filled it all with halloween soundtrack albums. number 1 is "spooky scare sounds for halloween" put out by Martha Stewart Living and features martha stewart with sinister red eyes

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 03/10/2026

is there a new england ego-boosting equivalent to when a person from the us south calls you "hon", "boss", or "darlin" or when a british person says that your suggestion is "a good shout" maybe that is the dopamine i am missing closest i can think of is "wicked" but that's less applicable to […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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Reposted by The Birdbassador

SpookJ 👻 @snoopj.hachyderm.io.ap.brid.gy · 01/10/2026

Happy "Charles Darwin is poorly today" Day to those who celebrate 165 years ago today, Charles Darwin was having a rough one

Photo of Charles Darwin's hand-written journal entry from 1 Oct 1861 and digitized text of same

"But I am very poorly today and very stupid and hate everybody and everything."

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 30/09/2026

exclusively wearing black, purple, and/or flannel for the past 20 years means that i am essentially a guided missile pointed directly at autumn

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 29/09/2026

[us pol technically] how come us presidents have such clownshow middle names "robinette" "delano" "milhous" "birchard" "gamaliel" harry truman's was just the initial "s." grant's real first name was "hiram", "ulysses" was his middle name, and "s" was just a nickname. a nickname middle name! […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 28/09/2026

who even says I /want/ to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality, anyway? sounds like a "you" problem

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 28/09/2026

had a vivid dream that a bunch of people were upset with me at karaoke because i chose phoebe bridgers followed by mountain goats (it was specifically "i can't wait" and "bell swamp connection", respectively) and everybody else was doing madonna/cher/abba etc and i was messing with the vibe.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 26/09/2026

they should make a piece of media where there's a child and their drawings aren't creepy and prophetic, they are just regular kid drawings and the other characters try to be complimentary but internally they are thinking "guess they can't all be winners"

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 25/09/2026

i'm sure i've said this before but it still bothers my extremely not-from-the-northeast brain that i now have to periodically "prep for a nor'easter". grizzled ship captain language.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 24/09/2026

i normally do a duolingo lesson or two as a way to wind down before bed but there was some issue with syncing and it was just making me trace the kanji for meat (肉) over and over again for like 10 minutes straight. going file this under the category "nothing to worry about"

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 24/09/2026

"Gentlemen, imagine someone playing your puzzle game for the mobile phone. But they are playing it incorrectly. Rules so simple you can get the idea across in a sentence, but they repeatedly make elementary errors. Maybe even the same error twice. Wouldn't you be […] [Original post on jorts.horse]

don draper from mad men giving a slide presentation to some clients

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 21/09/2026

every current video game is a linear combination of features present in either: a) some flash game called "poke the possum!" that was made by a single teen in 2001 b) some triple a game called "Dustshadow: Revenant Echos" made by 200 people who were all laid off immediately after finishing […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 20/09/2026

people talk about how the apollo 11 navigation computer was 36kb or whatever but i think i would rather use that to go to the moon than, like, any piece of modern software. spinning up a react webpage to show me my navigation options and then three unskippable ads (including one for premium […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 19/09/2026

i was telling someone that it feels good in a catharsis sort of way to write a mean blog post that then you don't publish, before realizing that i was really just describing "keeping a diary"

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 19/09/2026

which bird has the most plaintive cry? common loon obvi a front runner but don't count out the mourning dove or, heck, even our quotidian friend the herring gull

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 19/09/2026

"jacques, jacques! it's martin! your cousin, martin lacan! you know that new form of psychoanalysis you were looking for? well listen to THIS:" (martin holds the phone up to me anachronistically mentioning how, in attempting to fulfill my desire, i am seeking an unobtainable surplus of enjoyment […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 18/09/2026

there are certain nerd concepts that i make an effort not to remember because people take such joy in explaining them to me. e.g. minecraft redstone circuits THAC0 from d&d essentially all mechanics from guilty gear but esp. roman cancel

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 17/09/2026

letting down the side today (was asked by two people for what a discworld reading order would be and just froze for 20-30 seconds rather than responding)

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 16/09/2026

RIP Annie Dillard, i am frightfully sorry that you were subjected to the ultimate punishment of all authors: you were assigned to me in school. "The mind wants the world to return its love, or its awareness; the mind wants to know all the world, and all eternity, and God. The mind’s sidekick […]

Original post on jorts.horse

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 15/09/2026

saw a "eat the rich" patch but it was kirby with a guy's arm sticking out (pinstripe suit sleeve, rings, etc.) but, while i appreciate the sentiment this would turn kirby into bourgeoisie kirby and give him class traitor powers and i don't wish that for him.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 15/09/2026

oof, blog post went so poorly that it had <100 views and created -1 followers. nobody read it, but one person did and it reminded them to unsubscribe.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 14/09/2026

mcorrell.medium.com/advanced-virtue… hello. here is a blog post about some recent work in data ethics in which i am more polite than usual and don't call for industrial sabotage although perhaps you can read between the lines.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 12/09/2026

i think it's a marker of how cool names used to be that you can go "paracelsus, what a cool name" and then remember that his real name was "theophrastus bombast von hohenheim"

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 12/09/2026

this differs from my backup plan only in that my writing would be much more boring

Screenshot of a news article reading:
"Deng Yu, the 37-year-old Chinese mathematician who won the 2026 Fields Medal, has a backup plan if artificial intelligence puts him out of a job.

On Tuesday, he wrote on social media that "if AI can solve all maths problems, I'll go home and write my yuri novel".

Deng is known to be a big fan of yuri, a genre of Japanese novels and comics that depicts intimate friendships and romantic relationships between women.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 09/09/2026

they should invent some kind of new whizbang gizmo that lights up

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 09/09/2026

[ai] a bit i've been rolling around in my head all morning is "what if fast food companies advertised like ai companies"

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 08/09/2026

looking for a term/additional instances of the following phenomenon: a) the text of humpty dumpty doesn't explicitly describe him as an egg b) santa claus is not explicitly said to dress all in red (until the coca cola commercial era) c) the tricia lockwood "you kick miette like the football?" […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 06/09/2026

had to learn about the ongoing linux-related drama from someone who is not even on mastodon. seems like a violation of the mastodon tos.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 04/09/2026

i put this on my work calendar so i wouldn't forget. mourn ya til i join ya, good buddy.

image of heroic kaiju pigmon from ultraman lying dead amongst the rocks of tatara island. the subtitles read "september 4, 1966, Pigmon, who was popular among the girls, died.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 03/09/2026

:goosesiren::goosesiren::goosesiren:GOOSE MAP:goosesiren::goosesiren::goosesiren: src: www.irbc.ie/notes/cackling/cackling…

Map of 11 taxa by Michael O'Keefe of Canada Geese and Cackling Geese across North America. Other than differences in size and some minor difference in bill shape, they look almost identical. Per the creator, "given the still relative lack of solid criteria for identification, this diagram really serves little purpose other than to illustrate the general trend towards larger birds to the south, smaller birds to the north and darker birds to the north west"

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 03/09/2026

the cha cha slide and the time warp are songs self-referentially about their own dances that also specifically describe how to do the dance in question. the twist and the monster mash are vague. la bamba is not specific but does describe the qualities that assist in doing the dance. i propose […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 02/09/2026

they should write more stories where somebody pretending to be the grand inspector comes to town or wherever and the mere promise of their arrival throws everything into disarray and reveals hitherto tacit disfunction and there is a big climax of disorder after which, uh oh, the real inspector […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 02/09/2026

VOLITION [Easy: Failure]: You're full, but If you put the leftovers away, it would be less than a full serving, which would be pointless. A surrender. Instead, why don't you finish the rest? Plus, reheated risotto will never taste right. You can do this.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 01/09/2026

🍎📅👨‍⚕️🙅

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Reposted by The Birdbassador

highly praised and little read @hannah.posts.rat.pictures.ap.brid.gy · 31/08/2026

I think wikipedia does this intentionally to taunt people with adhd. Like hold on tell me about the cat

United States Treasury security

"Treasury Bill" redirects here. For the cat, see Rufus of England.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 31/08/2026

whoops too many people on mastodon know my government name. poor opsec.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 30/08/2026

unfortunately there's no spanish word for "dog." if you point at a dog and ask a spanish speaker what it is called they will say "perro", which is short for "pero, no hay una palabra para ese animal"

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 29/08/2026

correct post from sa graph thread poster aniviron

handdrawn graph titled "parts of a goat" with the y-axis labelled "danger" and the x-axis labeled "cuteness". their rectangular eyes are in the bottom left, their horns in the top middle, and their noises in directly in the center.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 29/08/2026

sometimes when i feel i am letting someone in my life down and also am watching/listening to a bunch of stuff, my subconscious will combine that into a dream where i meet a celebrity and they are inexplicably mad at me.

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 28/08/2026

there are two kinds of actually existing dashboards (metaphorically): 1) guy with a whip who says "work faster! the boss is coming!" 2) those fisher price strollers with the big fake plastic wheel and buttons on them so the babies can pretend they are driving a car while mommy pushes them the […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 25/08/2026

i originally did žižek-style lacanian psychoanalysis of media as a Bit, but now it is increasingly becoming Not a Bit and i need to put a stop to it.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 23/08/2026

didn't watch camp miasma today because i watched the mary oliver biopic instead (miasma is tomorrow). i think john waters should provide catty gossip periodically in every single movie, even, like, interstellar or avatar 3 or whatever

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 20/08/2026

horse named David Faster Will-race

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 19/08/2026

[ai] me, twenty years ago: "ha, it's very funny that captain kirk made all of those evil computers self destruct just by talking to them, of course real AI would not fall victim just to semantic trickery" me, now: "somebody is absolutely going to be able to talk an AI into destroying itself if […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 19/08/2026

i know "the two genders" posts are played out but i have to emphasize the extent that these are, to me, the two genders.

photo of a dolly parton themed pinball machine

photo of an elvira themed pinball machine

Reposted by The Birdbassador

Depths of Wiktionary @depthsofwiktionary.wikis.world.ap.brid.gy · 15/08/2026

English entry for "abbr." on Wiktionary. The definition line reads as following:

Noun
1. Abbreviation of abbreviation.

English entry for "mispeling" on Wiktionary. The definition line reads as following:

Noun
1. Misspelling of misspelling.

English entry for "archaïc" on Wiktionary. The definition line reads as following:

Adjective
1. Archaic spelling of archaic.

English entry for "absolete" on Wiktionary. The definition line reads as following:

Adjective
1. Obsolete form of obsolete.

The Birdbassador @birdbassador.jorts.horse.ap.brid.gy · 12/08/2026

if somebody stopped time and then threw a bunch of knives at me that hung in mid air and then dropped a steamroller on me and then punched the steamroller to make it hurt extra hard once it landed and then restarted time so all the knives flew at me super fast from point blank range and then […]

Original post on jorts.horse

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