iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

i'm not in a relationship because what do you mean if i want thai food, i gotta check with someone else to see if they want thai food, and if they don't want thai food i can't have thai food?!! absolutely NOT

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

"are you team pancakes or team waffles" baby i'm team syrup. the foods are simply the vehicle. and sometimes? i'm just walking

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 23/04/2026

not exactly sure how to use a crock pot but i'm pretty sure this chicken i've been slow cooking for 15 years is almost done

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Reposted by Ali Garfinkel

Kina Lee @artbykina.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

Hey look, this isn't going to be a dead account anymore! If you've randomly come across this post just know I'm gonna art so hard now. Here's a current WIP of some traditional art. #wip #art #traditionalart #digitalart #buyintoart

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 28/02/2026

give me the nobel peace prize or i too will bomb iran

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 25/12/2025

so we're just gonna let a man named Klaus in american airspace

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 23/11/2025

and for my nighttime sweet treat: 2 berry tums

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 12/11/2025

incredible how one small shart can create a lifetime of trauma

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 07/11/2025

must be the microplastics in my brain that are making me so snacky

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 31/10/2025

*taking a handful of candy from every trick-or-treater who comes to my door* tariffs

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 21/10/2025

why is every sour candy maker such a pussy

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 14/09/2025

centuries and centuries of human development simply to end up exactly how we've always been

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 04/09/2025

the germans don't do bloopers, they do krauttakes

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Reposted by Ali Garfinkel

Sarah @thetigersez.bsky.social · 14/01/2025

The Facebook people are here now (derogatory)

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 16/08/2025

a burger king commercial came on and in it were two older people wearing those paper crowns and without looking away from the screen my mom just goes "if you ever see me wearing a burger king crown i want you to shoot me on the spot. don't even let me explain."

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 18/07/2025

"too many people have main character syndrome" not me. i love being an npc. just idly standing around, watching the birds. oh you going on a quest? can you bring me back something

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 11/07/2025

hey did you know that if you knock down a wasp's nest it may be filled with spiders? did you know that? because i didn't know that. i didn't know that until it hit the ground and exploded on my bare feet

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 27/06/2025

left one of my knees unshaven so i could have something to pet

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 18/06/2025

[the devil, as kristi noem's fingertips slip through his grasp]: some day, my love

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Reposted by Ali Garfinkel

slop enjoyer @slop.guru · 27/05/2025

did we really need to invent gogurt? is regular yogurt not already portable enough?

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 01/06/2025

condensation is so pathetic like WHAT are u crying about u are a GLASS

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 29/05/2025

turned 37 today which, in los angeles, qualifies me for a senior discount

a lil bday pic of me in a nice black top 🥳

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 25/05/2025

every painting from the 1800s is like ok girl get them titties out

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

when i say i’m enjoying a tv series and the person i’m talking to is like ‘you should read the books next’ it’s like sorry i’m watching 18 hours of television a day when would i possibly have time for a book

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Reposted by Ali Garfinkel

slop enjoyer @slop.guru · 19/05/2025

sorry i’m late bro there were enemies nearby and i couldn’t fast travel

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

happy mother's day to the woman who will still swaddle me upon request

my adult body swaddled-wrapped in a bed sheet

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 11/05/2025

look when it comes to sailor moon personally i would not be jazzed if my life were in danger and a masked tuxedo man in a cape and top hat showed up throwing flowers and reciting poetry

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

as kids my sister & i would annoy each other so badly in the car & it'd piss my mom off. she'd go 'GIRLS ENOUGH! Hands in your laps & look out your windows' & we'd be like jeez whats her deal. & now that i think about it it was prob bc our idea of 'joking around' was unbuckling each others seatbelts

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 04/05/2025

sometimes art just speaks to you

a car laden with various bumper stickers that say things like

"I BRAKE FOR AMERICA'S ONLY NATIVE MARSUPIAL"

"Pro-Possum, Pro-Choice"

"HOW AM I DRIVING? I'M NOT. THIS VEHICLE IS DRIVEN BY 700 RATS."

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 01/05/2025

my bf [lying to his friends about why my arm is in a sling]: uhh she's fine she just fell-- me [being brave]: i was trying to rip a peach along its butt crease with my bare hands and banged my elbow against the desk so hard it made me cry

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 19/04/2025

inside me are two prebiotic sodas, locked in a battle for my gut health. they will both kill me

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 19/04/2025

this tomato has someone else's fingerprint pressed into it and i know it's someone else's because i put MY fingerprint against it and it didn't unlock

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 17/04/2025

ME: where's that show STREAMING PLATFORM: ? ME: the show i've been bingeing for days? SP: ?? ME: the show i've spent the last 40 hours watching SP: ??? ME: i just want to resume watching that show SP: UGH omg then go type it in the search letter by letter with your remote what am i your mommy

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 14/04/2025

GOD: heaven or ghost? ME: gee idk do i wanna float around in ur lame cloud or do i wanna spend eternity scaring people in their bathrooms

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 14/04/2025

my dad saw a minivan and called it a 'catholic sports car'

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 11/04/2025

was smearing lambs' blood all over my door when one of my neighbors wished me a happy passover and i was like wait what

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 06/04/2025

How Stella Got Her Grooved Back (osteoporosis)

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 03/04/2025

another day, another pair of crumbled undies found in my pant leg after i've already left the house

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 18/03/2025

idk why it's so funny to me that pilates is just named after the dude who invented it: Joseph Pilates. it'd be like if the guy who came up with pickleball was named Brian Pickleball

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 17/03/2025

favorite pastimes include: 1. yelling SHUT THE FUCK UP out my window to anything that makes any bit of noise whatsoever end of list

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 11/03/2025

them, uninformed chud: wraps always fall apart when you put them down me, innovative genius: oh do they

a wrap held together with a long plastic clip

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 08/03/2025

it's called an oedipal complex maybe you've freud of it

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 08/03/2025

wish the guy i used to like would text me already so he could see how not interested in him i am anymore

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 07/03/2025

"I know I am, but what are you?" - Socratease

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 05/03/2025

"Nobody gets in to see the System Administrator! Not nobody, not no how!" - The Wizard of OS

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 04/03/2025

the most attractive person i’ve ever seen in my life just saw me try to get out of the car with my seatbelt still on so if anyone needs me i’ll be dead in my tub

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Ali Garfinkel @aligarchy.bsky.social · 02/03/2025

i'm not being 'sassy' i just hate you

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