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AlastairFT 🍉

@alastairft.bsky.social
130 followers 123 following 4.6K posts

I invented the scroll lock key, directed the hit film Princess Mononoke and played Scotty in the original Star Trek. I'm also one of them there streamists! www.twitch.tv/alastairft Read my ""web" "comic"": maryelestia.webcomic.ws

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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 8h
Strange New Worlds is a really lavish show, but between the pointless cinematic aspect ratio, the heavy vignetting, edge blurring and overly dark colour correction, they just crush all the detail. Basically, there's an oval in the middle of the shot that's actually in focus, but otherwise it's mush.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 14h
There's never been a magic school story that adequately explained or showed what practical application magic education has. You can be a magic teacher, a magic cop or a magic terrorist but otherwise get down to the jobcentre.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Trying to 'um actually' the pope is profoundly hobbyless behaviour.
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hazel marie @dykeworship.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
allies 30 seconds after mild criticism
cardboard box labeled "be quite!® straight power"
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
People who call building a computer 'adult lego' have neither built a computer nor a lego set.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin PRE ORDER CHIMERA 2.16.27 🍉 @scumbelievable.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Move over, SALO
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: underwater ocean camera view of a whale fall on the sea floor, with various bottom feeders and weird fishes crawling around the decomposing remains. Off panel, someone says, “hang on a second…” Panel 2: the speaker is a member of a marine biologist crew, remotely viewing the video footage from a computer monitor. The biologist is leaning against his colleague’s chair. He continues, “pan the camera back.” Panel 3: Back underwater, the POV shifts to the other end of the whale carcass. There’s a large spider crab with a standing just off to the side. It has a human face in a neutral expression, and is wearing glasses. The marine biologist says, “I think I went to high school with that guy.”
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
You can tell who's left watching terrestrial TV because the majority of adverts are for cremation services.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The more I read into 2XKO, the more I'm desperate to figure out what exactly the plan was. Expecting a 1v1 tournament fighter to do League of Legends numbers literally out of the gate is beyond insane. Success really does just leave you completely incapable of reading the room.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Counter-argument: Yes it is move the fuck on.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Shame, Kubo and the Two Strings isn't really as good as I remembered. It feels a bit like a handful of crackers did a 20 second google search for 'Japanese stuff' and called it a day. Also kinda telling that there are like, two Japanese people in it. Still, the artistry will never not be impeccable.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Shame, Kubo and the Two Strings isn't really as good as I remembered. It feels a bit like a handful of crackers did a 20 second google search for 'Japanese stuff' and called it a day. Also kinda telling that there are like, two Japanese people in it. Still, the artistry will never not be impeccable.
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Tool-Assisted Speedrun clips @tasnocontext.bsky.social · 24/08/2025
Game: Family Feud (1993, SNES) TAS Author: Heisanevilgenius Source: tasvideos.org/1248M
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
As one of countless dorks critical of the way Doctor Who is run and written, I don't think the solution to the showrunner not doing a great job is 'no showrunner at all'
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Anon Opin @anonopin.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
My favourite living artist is Bobby Fingers. The internet was invented for this man.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
No streams this week because I'm away from home. In the meantime I suggest you watch one of my old VODs and go 'yes, good,' the entire time.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
No streams this week because I'm away from home. In the meantime I suggest you watch one of my old VODs and go 'yes, good,' the entire time.
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Gwen C. Katz @gwenckatz.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Fuck ChatGPT flyers. The future is broadsheets.
A crowded broadsheet with way too many fonts. It says:
Forget ChatGPT Flyers
Say it with 
Broadsheets
Unlimited fonts
Stretch them
Or cram a really long sentence into one line for no good reason
No whitespace
Mix capital and lowercase
Pointing hands
(They're called manicules!)
Don't be left behind
Broadsheets are the future
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
This season was, understanding that there were at least three good episodes, a complete and utter mess in which nothing really happened.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
The front cover of my next Mary compilation! It'll be on sale... at some point or other fairly soon. I seem to remember hearing that Gumroad is an AI hellscape these days so I think I want to find somewhere else to hawk my wears. Ko Fi, perhaps?
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I feel like no one is pointing out the absurdity of the guy rewarding Batman with a Batman action figure
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
You know what bugs me about Washington DC? George Washington was still alive when they called it that. Meaning he okayed naming the capital after himself. Prick.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
The front cover of my next Mary compilation! It'll be on sale... at some point or other fairly soon. I seem to remember hearing that Gumroad is an AI hellscape these days so I think I want to find somewhere else to hawk my wears. Ko Fi, perhaps?
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: a guy is putting on his jacket, getting ready to leave his apartment. He says, “gonna go get some ice cream.” Panel 2: the guy peeks around a corner into another room in his apartment. In the room, there is a monkey with glowing eyes floating in a large, shimmering, blue tube and some unusual technology lining the walls. The guy asks, “you want anything, omniscient monkey in hypersleep?” Panel 3: answering his own question, the guy scoffs, “psh! Duh… banana flavor.”
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
This week's Strange New Worlds was reasonably decent until it somehow fell into the precise same pitfall as RTD2 Doctor Who, which is thinking that saying the term 'space baby' one hundred billion times is fun or interesting, instead of annoying and faintly embarrassing.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Obviously David Hayter should have been in 5 (though I do quite enjoy Kiefer Sutherland) but to me the other great absence from Phantom Pain is Josh Keaton's Ocelot. There's rarely been a video game voice performance quite as cunty.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Aliens is great because you get to see 20 Deadpool wannabes lose their fucking minds the moment they're faced with an actual problem.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
The Mr Beast book has probably made back the publishing costs by now just from YouTubers chomping at the bit to criticise it, as though a dollar and an ironic dollar have a different value.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Read this situation summarised neatly as 'Let's fire all the people that joined specifically because they love Halo and give it to the people who made Black Ops 7'
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Johnathan Major's career looks like it's going great
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I think I'm the only person alive who hasn't worn their PlayStation controller thumbsticks down to the bare plastic. For as long as I've been alive, I've had no idea how everyone keeps fucking up the thumbsticks like that.
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Kyrie Page @kyriepage.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Rest in peace to Richard Harrison, impeccable B-movie master, part of one of the funniest movie endings of all time.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Why in God's name do we need adverts for the Advertising Standards Agency? Who's watching or listening to anything and thinks 'boy, I wish there was a company who'd make sure my advert is above board'? I've never been more confused on what the goal of an advertising campaign is.
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GLITCH @glitchprod.com · 23/09/2026
She's missed you. Knights of Guinevere returns October 9. The season will feature 8 episodes.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
It'd be nice if MercurySteam managed to port Samus Returns to the Switch. Probably wouldn't even be that fundamental a change given that they could just do what they did with Dread and map the abilities to the face buttons instead of the touch screen.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Back in the day the ultra-rich would display their wealth by commissioning artists, architects etc to make dope-ass shit, to quote Aristotle. I feel like the last vestige of that is Travis Knight bankrolling Laika so they can make art films while shrugging off a steady stream of box office bombs.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I've never cared for Screen X. I'm all for a widescreen presentation but the two extra screens at the sides are just visual noise and the only relevant screen is the one in front, so two thirds of the display are utterly wasted.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I'm sure Carrie Fisher would love the bronze statue of her in the bikini outfit she famously despised
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Something different today: I'm throwing away my life and career to become a professional voice actor, with Choicer Voicer!!! twitch.tv/alastairft
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Activision in charge of Halo is an actual nightmare idea. I mean I know MS haven't had a clue what to do with that series for a decade but, still. That fucking blows. I'd be less torn up about it if I weren't president, treasurer and sole member of the 'Halo Infinite is good' society.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I was hyped beyond words for Halo 2 in primary school. A hanger on I didn't like tried sincerely convincing me he had Halo 2 on PlayStation. Called him out but he wouldn't buckle. HOWEVER, if the Halo 1 remake was successful enough to justify remaking 2, he could be vindicated retroactively.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I hosted my webcomic on Tapas for the first few chapter, before I switched entirely to Comicfury. Left a notice on the last page I posted on Tapas to go there instead so, this doesn't affect me much at all thankfully. RIP to a mid-ass website.
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Khayyaam #LIUKANGGANG @khayyaamb.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Just remembered one of the greatest X-Men posts of all time
Tweet by @alexqarbuckle:

SOUP MAGNETO: There’s something different about you today. New haircut?

GUARD: Nope.

SOUP MAGNETO: Ah yes… you had a big bowl of Soup for lunch.

GUARD: What? I —AAAUUGHH [soup molecules are torn from his body and formed into bouillon cubes which smash the soup-free prison]
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Every time Pelia goes DISSH ISH LIKE DE DRUGSH I DID I DE EIGHTEEEEHS DEY VUS GOOD DRUGSH I want Pike to give her a GDC-style 'I'd really prefer it if you'd be quiet'
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
art innit twitch.tv/alastairft
twitch.tv
AlastairFT - Live on Twitch
Doing an art! At last!!! !discord | Streaming art.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Aliens is great because you get to see 20 Deadpool wannabes lose their fucking minds the moment they're faced with an actual problem.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
The admiral was the fella who played Miles Dyson, I learned last night. That man can do an acting good.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
No one really talks about Dr Disrespect any more which firstly, can't imagine why, secondly, thank fuck, but even during his heyday, I didn't get him. Was his kayfabe shtick that he was lame and pretending to be cool, or was it that he was actually cool? Always unclear.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
You know, last week's Strange New Worlds was a little TOO good, it's only right they follow it up with one that sucked absolute shit.
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AlastairFT 🍉 @alastairft.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
A friend's thankfully-now-ex-girlfriend ADORED the Paul Anderson Resident Evil movies (which was a decent barometer for her level of taste in general; big Harry Potter fan too), so I wonder what she thinks of the new one. I can imagine her being put off by the fact it's good.
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