iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I had a problem with the indie charts as their definition was “released by an independent label” which meant Kylie and Jason were included

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Watching the Netflix adaptation of Steinbeck’s East of Eden and can’t get it out of my head that they have cast Mo Salah as Adam

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

For anyone on the verge of buying a ticket, please do as it’s a wonderful evening. The critical review of ,,,;;pppppp’[[[[[[[[[;’;//////////////////3, had me doubled up in laughter.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

My take on this generation of young people is this: they are either idiots or super sensible. There is no in between. Society need a few sensible kids to see what happens when they go down a car park ramp in a trolley and a few idiots to go “erm maybe this is bad idea”

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Whilst I don’t want to restart the great West v East Surrey poetry wars again )too much blood was spilled), west Surrey will always kick east Surrey’s ass.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

I am very much looking forward to tomorrow in Guildford. Even more so if they’ll be a poetry based fight

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I’ve tuned my arse to sound like the wind chimes from the opening of Plainsong. In fact it was me that opened The Hyde Park 40th anniversary concert

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

The impact that Mince had can never be understated. Thousands of people associate Roy Hodgson with Warhammer, Peter with his puffa puffa, British managers with fancy lunches. I genuinely can’t see Harry Kane and not think of his little gang.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

The real confession should be “at school one of my classmates wanted to be shorter so I carried out surgery on her during lunch break despite being 13 and only having access to a Bunsen burner, a protractor and a French grammar text book”.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

My company moved into a temporary office space whilst our building was being renovated. In the first week I found a secret toilet that no one else seems to use or know about. Clean, large and great cubicles. This week I discovered someone else has discovered it. They need more fibre in their diet

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

“The final exam before you can graduate from this institution is to answer the following: how old were you when you wanted to be cop, where are we and what is your favourite Steven Segal movie. Answer to graduate police academy” “6, city, under siege”

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Remember the village motto. Mrs Milton in the village store said she saw a foreign looking gentleman near the church last month. We must all be on high alert

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

I’ve heard a lot about AI using lots of toucans and the expense associated. Do they feed the toucans into a furnace to power the AI machine?

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

I drew a cock and balls on Harold’s head. Always carry a black sharpie and it was asking for it. If they didn’t want us to draw on it they should have said.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

My father is convinced that every electric car will burst into flames and that every car fire is caused by an electric car bursting into flames. 1984 Volvo caught fire? That’ll be because they converted it into an electric car

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Whilst they have included Evel Knievel’s famous attempt to jump the Grand Canyon many historians like myself are saddened at the refusal to stitch in the 1983 film BMX Bandits. Without this inclusion the tapestry can never be considered complete

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

Great idea and I can’t see any problems with it. Plus if you don’t like a player and they identify the football correctly, you can then say it’s a snooker ball that you’ve painted to look like a football. You can keep your €7million signing on fee. We don’t want your kind round here. Later loser!

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Raye at Reading Festival. Wow, what a talent

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Is Sir Michael allowed to have pets again after “the incident”?

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

[Anon mode on] Poseidon Posse for life! Neptune nerds smell like wee [Anon mode off]

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Don’t forget to do one for Tiamat for us fans of Mesopotamian gods

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

What a brilliant way to kill the UK’s tech and financial industries

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

My daughter was pestering me to buy a ticket despite me telling her the chances of winning were minimal. I caved in and bought a single ticket so she could understand that it is gambling and after the initial excitement comes the reality of losing money. We won £50

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

Me to God - “please don’t take her just because you can”

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

That’s no moon. Oh wait, sorry, yes it is

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

The 14th August 2026, forever known in hospitals across the globe as cock twist day

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

I’ll ask Mr Collier if the cow shed roof is safe to climb on to

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

[private DM to @sirmichael.bsky.social you will already know this but there is a secret eclipse being put on only for VIPs and celebrities next year. I’m organising it but there is a small upfront fee to be able to view it. Can you send me €47 asap and I’ll put you down?]

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

Everyone knows if you stare at the sun during an eclipse you get super powers. The government don’t want us to do it though as they think too many superheroes will be bad for them.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

I wasn’t trying to find names for you! That would be antagonistic and I know you hate that [private DM to everyone but Sir Michael - it was for him and I like karate dork the most]

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

Here’s some I have just come up with: Mickey tiny nips Karate dork Old lady short changer Where’s the €6 Michael? Mr never done the k*ssings

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Sartre est mort quatre mois avant la sortie de Caddyshack. Sa vie n'était pas accomplie.

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

One thing that the nations of the United Kingdom all have in common, whether you are English, Welsh, Scottish or northern Irish, is we are the worst tourists. Globally despised and for a reason

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

One thing that the nations of the United Kingdom all have in common, whether you are English, Welsh, Scottish or northern Irish, is we are the worst tourists. Globally despised and for a reason

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

Is this the same group from the village show who said that your home made elderflower cordial lacked character and your sourdough hadn’t been kneaded properly?

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

I would rank the smell of pets from least to most smelly as cat, dog, reptile. I can’t comment on ferret as I don’t live in 1950s Yorkshire

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

I’d imagine the reason that the 2nd and 3rd class passengers couldn’t send emails was because they kept all their friends email addresses in a book called email addresses. The books must have got soggy during the sinking so couldn’t be read until they got to port and dried them out

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

I think you’ve just shown us why AI is useful

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

I’m glad my webposting brought you a boost. Also as it came from your most loyal supporter, me, it should really encourage you to produce more of this content [PRIVATE MESSAGE to Sir Michael, Pam and Cathal have both come out to say privately how poor the posting was. They are not loyal to you!]

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

I disagree, as a loyal supporter of your webpostings, both on here and MySpace, I always stand up and applaud everything you give us. [PRIVATE MESSAGE to everyone apart from @sirmichael.bsky.social - he’s clearly lost it. This is very poor, bordering on embarrassing. Shall we follow someone else?]

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

I’m sorry to have made that suggestion and Pam is correct, you would never mess with the rules of the game [Private message only for @sirmichael.bsky.social I’ve sent you €37 as I’d also like to see a Gladiator style combat section with real lions and tigers. Also could we have lots of fire?]

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

I know you are a man of honour @sirmichael.bsky.social and want to see football put back at the centre of the World Vup rather than it being about half time shows, advertising and revenue. I have €17 to invest but would like to see more BMX stunts in the game. Can you do something?

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Reposted by Willgoose

Trish Byrne @trishyb.bsky.social · 30/07/2026

The Hatchback of Doctor Moreau.

On the rear windscreen of a dusty red car, a sticker reads "My kids have PAWS."

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

Obviously the character is entirely fictional but I would say anyone who takes €14.37 and spends it on crisps and karate magazines must be the most evil person alive. Possibly also not a very good criminal. As I say, this is a fictional character

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

Once again you are an inspiration. I’ve written one; PC Falstaff, short change investigator. Falstaff meets his match when called to investigate why 6 ladies all claim to have been short changed in the village store. The villain, Lord Mitchel turns out to be the worst criminal he’s ever come across

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

When I first moved here I knew she lived in the village and assumed she was just the local celeb. It quickly became apparent that she was so much more. She was a pillar of the community and everyone knew her. She was lovely with the children and always had time. She will be missed

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

Went to see a very famous band a few weeks ago. Won’t name them as the rest will be telling. The support act were quite fun, a bit punky, loud and angry. Was impressed until they pulled out a flute. Ruined it. I hope they never find success

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

How are your friends at the Neptune Marketing Board? Remember @sirmichael.bsky.social the investigation into the missing money from the post office is still ongoing and Father O’Reily will ask to see your bank account. Will there be an unaccounted payment of €17 from NMB? Corruption to the core

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Willgoose @willgoose.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

That episode of In the Night Garden where Upsy Daisy put the Pontypines on trial for suspected communist leanings was the end of it for me.

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