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Patrick Cosmos

@veryimportant.lawyer
47.7K followers 946 following 21.2K posts

NO HOMEWORK PODCAST - @nohomework.website // veryimportant.lawyer // bigsleeprecords.bandcamp.com/album/… I think you’re headed for the disco burn

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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 11h
leon kennedy being eaten by del lago the lake monster in resident evil 4
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 15/10/2026
Singing my life with his words
Can You Eat Sprouted Potatoes?
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 14/10/2026
IN THIS HOUSE, WE BELIEVE:
DOGS CAN PEE ON THE YARD 
IT'S TOTALLY FINE 
THAT'S HOW DOGS WORK 
SCIENCE IS REAL 
DOG SCIENCE 
THEY PEE PLACES
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 13/10/2026
Little domino labeled "Hangman Adam Page says "workers' rights" in a promo"

leading to a big domino labeled "The Houthis have caught, and compromised to a permanent end, Danhausen"
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 12/10/2026
??
cammy from street fighter. hot blond lady who is also violent and wears a red beret
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 12/10/2026
COUNTLESS EYES ARE STARING AT YOU
FULL OF WEIRDNESS
(chintzy probably ai illustration of a bunch of glowing eye yard decorations)Staring from Hell
Countless eyeballs and skeletons gaze at you, creating the most terrifying atmosphere of Halloween
(A closer up image of a few of the eyes)
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 10/10/2026
guy posting "god i wish that were me"
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 10/10/2026
And as it turns out, Geddy Lee is “a huge fan of Steely Dan,” the frontman and bassist tells Rolling Stone in a newly released interview from our recent cover-story sessions. “Almost named my daughter Aja after that record. I love that record so much. I wore it out.” meme of the girl who is "going to be okay" but it says progressive rock fan instead of girl
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 10/10/2026
please say yes. i have a lot riding on this
Do Rush Like Steely Dan? We Found Out The Answer

Rolling Stone
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 09/10/2026
Old lady with walker: YOU USED TO GET PRESCRIBED MEDICINE BY A DOCTOR
INSTEAD OF BUYING IT OFF THE TV

Young lady helping: sure grandma let's get you to bed
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 06/10/2026
zelda totk logo but it says "hot dog"
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 06/10/2026
a billboard about heart health that says "this year thousands of men will die from stubborness." somebody spray painted NO WE WON'T underneath
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 01/10/2026
Reading the Bored Ape Wikipedia page feels like how it must feel when people with pet reptiles read the Silmarillion
Gwyneth Paltrow. During their 2021-2022 peak valuation, individual Bored Ape NFTs sold for millions of dollars, the most expensive for over $24 million. By April 2024, they had lost approximately 90% of their value relative to their 2022 peak.?]
~ Development and function
v Valuation history
v Legal issues
~ Reception
^ Controversies
ApeFest ocular injuries
In November 2023, guests reported burning pain in their eyes and vision problems after attending a Bored Ape event known as "ApeFest," in Hong
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 30/09/2026
billy corgan on the old, bad, bootleg ass infowars before it got real. he is layered the fuck up
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 29/09/2026
i would simply not be browbeaten by the self-appointed arbiters of Traditional Manly Masculinity when they can't tell sports teams apart and talk about "trip[s] down Budwesier Lite Lane." they might not have their fingers on the pulse of Traditional Manly Masculinity the way they say that they do
a facebook post from Oregon Republican Party reading:

In a trip down Budweiser Lite Lane, Tillamook Creamery has decided to label their products "Halal."

Oh, Tillamook, isn't it enough to say that EVERYONE loves your cheeses and ice cream and more? Did you have to join with the destroyers who divide us by race, religion, and ethnicity?

For those who care, Tillamook's Maker's Reserve 10-year Extra Sharp Cheddar is NOT halal, which means "permissible." We think it might be the best one they make.
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 29/09/2026
AMERICANS WHEN STUFF IS FOR THEE: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!! AMERICANS WHEN STUFF IS FOR ME: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.
an approximate graph of a poll saying that ~80% of americans  think "america would be better off if more americans worked in manufacturing" whereas ~25% believe "i would be better off if i worked in a factory." the republicans polled were slightly higher in both before somebody gets mad at me for not making this about that
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 29/09/2026
since I first mentioned the back to school beaver three weeks ago we have seen inflatable caleb williams and now this, which will come down within a week and be replaced by a yard full of halloween inflatables. initially i thought i was overselling the phenomenon but if anything i understated it
a yard decoration setup with an inflatable scarecrow sitting on a pumpkin. a tan pitbull dog looks back at me, disgusted.
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 29/09/2026
our human genes have been stolen by the cajun fried corn from wingstop
Headline: This Virus Stole a Human Gene and Won't Let Go of It. Photo is of nubby yellow blobs with a reddish stain in the middle
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 28/09/2026
referencing In Concert (2×LP, Album, Reissue, Gatefold Cover) CBS 88601

It's not mentioned anywhere, but this edition is a misprint. To play the disc in the correct order, you must first play side 1 then side 4 which is the opposite side of side 1 (like a normal disc in fact), and finish with the second disc with side 2 , and side 3 which are in reality, sides 3 and side 4. The auto-coupling announced is therefore not real but the indications on the labels are not correct.david cross losing his mind in the "pre-taped call in show" sketch
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 28/09/2026
the cover art of spinal tap's break like the wind, featuring the single "bitch school," looking like it's saying the quoted post
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 25/09/2026
silent hill baby nothing like it baby let's fuckin go silent hill let's go back to the sleepy town of silent hill
escalating vince mcmahon meme:
Simon Ordell is called back to the island of St. Amelia to ‘put things right’, 

encountering a town lying quiet beneath a heavy fog, seemingly abandoned but not at rest. 

Venturing deeper, and driven to understand his connection to the place and its inhabitants, 

Simon begins to discover fragments of a past rising to the surface.
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 22/09/2026
its them
the 69 boyz
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 21/09/2026
the youtube video "gardening on salvia" right after the dude smokes salvia and goes directly to space
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 21/09/2026
fucked up high contrast gold foil portrait of robert f kennedy jr the low-information pervert with the diseasestim heidecker - the normal kind of pervert - on tom goes to the mayor
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 20/09/2026
POV you just won your Dana White's Power Slap contest against Jake Hager
a shot from rise of the triad with blood and eyeballs flying around after a guy got exploded
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 20/09/2026
i think this sequence of kyle fletcher pictures have potential. i think they could be powerful.
aew wrestler kyle fletcher looking at a guy making an intense faceaew wrestler kyle fletcher looking at a guy making a "ain't i a stinker" face
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 20/09/2026
some of you guys are alright, don't go to wicker park tomorrow
RIVERS CUOMO lookalike contest Sunday 9/20 12PM in Wicker Park $500 prize!!
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 19/09/2026
This beer art has been cracking me up since I was old enough to drink (17)
Moose drool brown ale from big sky brewing. Art is a painting of a moose just spraying a waterfall of drool. It rocks
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 18/09/2026
it's spelled "sherrhoan" in the uk
a record listing for "ed sherrhan"
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 16/09/2026
Caleb Williams showed up today
An inflatable yard decoration of Bears quarterback Caleb Williams
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 13/09/2026
me watching black sabbath Paris 1970 on YouTube for the six hundredth time
Leaning forward in my chair and paying attention. To Black Sabbath Paris 1970
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 12/09/2026
As a basketball fan I sincerely cherish getting this text every year
A birthday text from a job website whose ceo is named Harrison Barnes
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 12/09/2026
Happy birthday to Squirrel. Today is her birthday. She is 12 and people still think she is a puppy
A tan pit bull dog. Today is her twelfth birthday. She smiling
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 08/09/2026
The day after we recorded I walked by my neighbor’s house and
Inflatable American flag peace sign hand. For Labor Day I guess
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 08/09/2026
(Trying not to act too eager) Grimace asked about me?
Email from Linkedin
7:25 PM
Someone at McDonald's you may know
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 07/09/2026
report post
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 07/09/2026
two comic panels
on the left, ray smuckles warily regards a glass of wine
on the right, cartilage head looks directly at the viewer with a drawn and mournful face
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 07/09/2026
Xfinity bill went up after my promotional rate expired
Michael Douglas in Falling Down
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 06/09/2026
An extremely sweaty and faded Ricardo Villalobos
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 06/09/2026
Other angle of her sleeping against the wall Zoomed in she sleepin against the wall but it’s rotated 90 degrees and she is smiling
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 06/09/2026
Got my dog into dabs today
Me teaching my dog how to use a dab penMy dog sleeping against the wall like a doofus
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 05/09/2026
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 05/09/2026
my Sims watching me delete the ladder:
Your Pool Is My Nightmare
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 05/09/2026
i'm at the combination The Onion and I Think You Should Leave. it sucks by the way
Trump calls Iran war 'small potatoes,' says 'it's not a big thing'
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 04/09/2026
Teodor: Hey, guys! What's goin' on? 
Beef: Oh uh we celebratin' that Ray finally graduated from ass man to breast man 
Teodor: Seriously? I was startin' to wonder about you, you chowderhead! 
Ray: Are... are ALL my dudes breast men? 
Teodor: Here, let me order you a Breast Man. They make a really good one here. 
Ray: You... we even got a drink? Ass men don't got no drink! 
Teodor: Bartender! Three Breast Men, if you please! 
Barkeep: Password? 
Teodor: "entropy9." 
Ray: Man, our drink has a PASSWORD? That is JAMES BOND IN A TOWEL! What other perks breast men get? 
Beef: Discounts on candy Phone call from a fireman Free karate lessons Corvette ignition ringtone Secret menu at Taco Bell 
Ray: There ain't no secret menu. 
Beef: Hee I brought my copy 'cause I knew you wouldn't believe me
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 04/09/2026
i don't think you should get in trouble for directing a member of your security detail to make it rain in the club www.nbcnews.com/politics/tru...
In April 2025, the report said, Chavez-DeRemer requested an off-the-record stop during personal travel to Oregon at a place that featured “partially nude dancers” with the member of the protective detail with whom she had a relationship. The secretary asked another agent to take money from her purse and “drop the bills one by one onto the partially nude woman.”
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 03/09/2026
Ray smuckles being held by the penis
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 03/09/2026
bookmarking this and checking back in at all-star break
grim reaper with a trail of blood behind him and open doors labeled "brooklyn nets" and "los angeles clippers." he is knocking on a door that says "philadelphia 76ers"
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 01/09/2026
josh (oldfriend99)
@oldfriend99

Caillou's dad: (texting) caillou is freaking the fuck out

12:15 PM · Nov 24, 2015
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 30/08/2026
link in zelda trying to prop a sign up with a horse
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