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Craig D. Lindsey

@unclecrizzle.bsky.social
856 followers 228 following 1.3K posts

I write. A lot. unclecrizzle@gmail.com

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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 16h
Yeah, I wrote about it. unclecrizzle.substack.com/p/so-were-st...
unclecrizzle.substack.com
So, We’re Still Raping, Fellas?!
As always, men and their dicks fuck up everything.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I wrote this.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
On Shaq, Chris Brown, and dealing with wealthy assholes. unclecrizzle.substack.com/p/if-you-ric...
unclecrizzle.substack.com
If You Rich, YOU A BITCH!!!
Another week dealing with wealthy assholes
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
WHO SHIT THE BED THIS WEEK?!? unclecrizzle.substack.com/p/shittiest-...
unclecrizzle.substack.com
Shittiest Week Ever (for the Moment)
Who shit the bed this week?
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Five years ago, I wrote about post-9/11 cinema. (S/O to my editor @jacoboller.bsky.social for making me revise the ending.) www.pastemagazine.com/movies/9-11-...
pastemagazine.com
The Movies Trying to Make Sense of 9/11 Serve as an Honest Historical Record
Cinema made, and changed, after 9/11 represent some of the same confusion and struggle for understanding felt by people all over the nation.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I wrote this too.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I wrote this.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
A new Thursdays at Midnight just dropped. unclecrizzle.substack.com/p/so-those-t...
unclecrizzle.substack.com
So, Those ‘Terminator’ Movies Didn’t Teach Y’all A Gotdamn Thing!?!
That jacked Austrian sumabitch warned us AI would kill us all -- BUT THEY DID THE SHIT ANYWAY!
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
I wrote about Dolly. unclecrizzle.substack.com/p/dont-be-a-...
unclecrizzle.substack.com
Don’t Be a Douchebag (and Other Things Dolly Taught Me)
On legends who leave, assholes who stay and how to not be a walking Summer’s Eve bottle
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
I wrote about the Natalie Harp thing. unclecrizzle.substack.com/p/a-hand-job...
unclecrizzle.substack.com
A Hand Job in the Middle of Nowhere
On Natalie Harp, presidential sex scandals, and some dull biopic with Bill Murray
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Yeah, this too.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
I wrote this too.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
I wrote this while I was in the hospital.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Some weekend ish for @culturemap.bsky.social. houston.culturemap.com/news/enterta...
houston.culturemap.com
These are the top 15 things to do in Houston this weekend
With 713 Day on the horizon (more on that soon), Houstonians might want to enjoy some music-related fare this weekend.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Just got off a bus where the driver got into it with a Spanish-speaking dude about not paying, before eventually giving up and letting him ride. When he got off the bus, he told the driver, “Have a nice day!” I now understand why bus drivers are assholes around here.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
QTP with a gif of a powerful woman!
static.klipy.com
Helen Mirren Shooting
ALT: Helen Mirren Shooting
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Well, the secret’s finally out. www.chron.com/culture/arti...
chron.com
Houston's finally getting another Half Price Books in 2027
Montrose is getting its Half Price Books back.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
I wrote this.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
I'm doing a 713 Day rundown again for @culturemap.bsky.social. If you have any events on that day, now is a good time to speak up. Here's last year's rundown: houston.culturemap.com/news/enterta...
houston.culturemap.com
More than 20 deals and specials celebrating Houston's 713 Day
Is it just us, or has 713 Day blown up these past few years?
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
I swear to God, if someone posts “India.Arie is trying to ruin my summer” ONE MO GOTDAMN TIME…
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Anyone know where I can track down the original (or director’s) cut of SHAOLIN SOCCER?
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
My favorite movie about America. Just sayin’. www.theguardian.com/film/2021/ma...
theguardian.com
Hear me out: why 1941 isn't a bad movie
The latest in our series of writers defending maligned films is a reappraisal of Steven Spielberg’s 1979 comedy flop
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Is there a thunderstorm in Houston, or are we still doing fireworks?
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
I’m bracing for the inevitable race war that’ll go down if and when the Democrats win the midterms. I wouldn’t be surprised if Orange Chicken “suggests” to his MAGA peeps that all the minorities/immigrants/queer folk are coming for them & they should stock up on AR-15s, just in case.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
Every time an attractive person roasts me, I’m like, “Well, that’s gonna fester some resentment.”
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
Just thought I’d remind all the Houstonians that I write a weekend event planner for @culturemap.bsky.social every Wednesday. If you have events that need a shout-out, let me know. If you need something to do on the weekends, here’s the link: houston.culturemap.com/series/weeke...
houston.culturemap.com
Weekend event planner houston on CultureMap Houston's site
CultureMap Houston
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
NEW YORK IS A WHOLE-ASS MOTION PICTURE NOW!!!
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Reposted by Craig D. Lindsey
Joe Scott @joexscott.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
Remember when a woman director made a Barbie film that grossed $1 Billion at the box office, and studios basically responded by saying, “That was great, but never do it again!”? Pepperidge Farms remembers….
static.klipy.com
Pepperidge Farm's Memorable Ad
ALT: Pepperidge Farm's Memorable Ad
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
If the India.Arie/Yung Miami whateva has taught us anything, it’s that a lot of muhfuckas out here really don’t know how nuance works.
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Reposted by Craig D. Lindsey
Cabel Sasser @cabel.panic.com · 04/07/2026
new metaphor just dropped
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
I wrote about AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY for @nashvillescene.com. www.nashvillescene.com/criticspicks...
nashvillescene.com
Critic's Pick — Staff Picks: 'Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery'
8 p.m. July 7 at the Belcourt
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Some weekend ish for @culturemap.bsky.social. houston.culturemap.com/news/enterta...
houston.culturemap.com
Here are the top 14 things to do in Houston this Fourth of July weekend
It’s Fourth of July weekend (aka America’s 250th), which means fireworks displays will be happening all over the Houston area.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
I wrote this.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
At what moment did you learn life was unfair? For me, it was when I chased some elementary-school kids around a classroom for constantly telling me I had AIDS, and I ended up getting paddled by the principal for it. Also, somewhere in the middle, some kid beat my ass.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
“The cavalcade of jackassery on display is exhausting.”
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Reposted by Craig D. Lindsey
Kayleigh Donaldson @ceilidhann.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Mel Brooks and the Davids.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
I wrote this.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Nicolas Cage’s best movie.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Has anyone ever given you a “How dare you!” unironically? And wasn’t that the exact moment you realized this person was a POS and needed their ass beat?
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Reason #22 I Was a Weird Child: My ten-year-old ass was obsessed with this movie. I had the soundtrack and everything. crookedmarquee.com/classic-corn...
crookedmarquee.com
Classic Corner: Ruthless People — Crooked Marquee
The 1987 screwball comedy is a Swiss watch of comic precision.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Finally read @bilgeebiri.bsky.social’s beautiful oral history on Spielberg that people in the comments don’t appreciate because dude is apparently a Zionist. www.vulture.com/article/oral...
vulture.com
The Raider of a Lost Art
Over 30 actors, filmmakers, and close friends recount how Steven Spielberg infiltrated Hollywood and helped the Movie Brats take over.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
So, basically, the Great American State Fair is just the Fyre Festival if the organizers still went ahead and put on a show.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
I’ve mostly been in the house broke and depressed as fuck, so I’ve only seen three of these. Check the comments to see which ones. www.avclub.com/best-films-2...
avclub.com
The best films of 2026 so far
The best films of 2026 so far include scrappy horror hits, ambitious first films, surreal daydreams, and at least one bicycle fight.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
I’m at a bus stop on 59 and Bissonnet and I’ve already had two 65 METRO buses pass me.
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Reposted by Craig D. Lindsey
Technical Fy-el @sdotcarter.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
They found Popeyes. 😭
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
Some weekend ish for @culturemap.bsky.social. houston.culturemap.com/news/enterta...
houston.culturemap.com
Here are the top 14 things to do in Houston this weekend
This weekend has several heavy hitters doing live concerts, including rap boss Rick Ross, soul songstress Alex Isley and, Lizzie McGuire herself, Hilary Duff.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
Bumped into another person today I’ve recently gotten to know, but didn’t recognize. At this point, I don’t know if my face blindness is due to early-onset Alzheimer’s, my formative years of being a TV-watching hermit, or just losing faith in people & choosing to be by my damn self.
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
I once heard somebody say, “I went to see WHY DO FOOLS RUSH IN last night.”
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Am I going blind or is it now customary for movies to look like that shit was shot in the dark?
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Craig D. Lindsey @unclecrizzle.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Since I haven’t been there in a while, are the bathrooms at Houston Public Library’s downtown location still, for lack of a better word, nasty as fuck?
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